posted on Nov, 7 2007 @ 09:18 PM
OK, I'm not taking sides here, just looking for information. I sure as hell don't want to be part of the Grand 9/11 Argument.
But if I'm planning this thing, sitting on my can in an air conditioned office reserved for Evil Government Minions, how do I know only four people,
most too far away to tell what is going on, are going to be all there is? How can they plan such a thing and not take it into consideration?
I can see it now:
Bertha and Bathsheba Butts drive over from Cleveland to see the sites the evening before. After staying in a Motel 8, they hope into their 1977 Buick
convertible with the wire spoke wheels, put the top down, and start cruising the Big City.
Bertha is driving and smoking a Virginia Slim in a holder while her 'fro blows in the wind. Ever since crossing the Potomac, Bathsheba has been
filming the sights with her new Sony Camcorder she got for her birthday. Not being students of politics, they don't recognize the big building ahead
on the right, but Bathsheba is impressed with it's size.
"Who you 'spose lives in that big old place, Bertha?"
"I ain't got a clue Sis, but get a picture and we'll tell everybody back home we took a tour."
And so the Sony whirs, focusing in on the odd shaped building. At just that moment, our mystery plane flies overhead in front of the car, and hops
over the Pentagon without touching it. A second later, as they are almost even with the building, a ball of fire erupts, along with a loud roaring
Bertha, always a fast driver anyway, is startled into stomping the accelerator to the floorboards and dropping here Virginia Slim into her lap, all in
the same moment The Buick's V-8 easily carries them beyond the expanding turmoil at a cool 94MPH.
Due to interesting inner city lives, both ladies have learned to never go back to something that could cause trouble. And from what little Bathsheba
could see over her broad shoulder as they sped away, this was trouble with a capitol T.
Scared that they might be blamed in some way for an obvious arson job, they find the quickest route out of town, and cut their sight seeing short.
Heading straight back to Cleveland, Bertha pushes the Buick, furious over the change in plans and the hole in her new red spandex pants. Since the
Buick has a monster CD player, but no radio, they never hear word one of what this day has been about.
Once home, the story is told to Eugen "Big E" Ledbetter, Bertha's on again-off again significant other. He, being at least 4 IQ points brighter
than the two sisters combined, immediately realizes that this picture of the plane and the explosion must be worth a weeks worth of his favorite
"candy", and promptly relieves the girls of this burden.
Eventually, through a couple of hands, each one progressively smarter than the last, this tape makes the evening news on KRAP-TV live from downtown
Cleveland, Ohio on 9/13. Now the cat is out of the bag, and the minions are in deep doo-doo.
Now this is how, as an evil genius, I would have to reason it out and discard this plan for becoming the American Il Duce. I couldn't be sure that
this hairbrained idea wouldn't get me a room at Sing Sing. I couldn't be reasonably sure that I could control enough factors with a busy highway
full of witnesses. Too much could go wrong for this to be a plan for anyone over Jr High age to hope to pull off.
Just my take so far. I'll read on and hope the plot gets less lame in this B rated re-make.