Greatest quotes ever?

If an old physicist says it is possible - then he/she is probably right.

If an old physicist says that it is impossible - then he/she is probably wrong.

"A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money."


W C Fields

My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me.
Benjamin Disraeli (1804 - 1881)

To disagree with three-fourths of the British public is one of the first requisites of sanity.
Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)

I don't necessarily agree with everything I say.
Marshall McLuhan (1911 - 1980)

When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
Gracie Allen (1906 - 1964)

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.
Sam Levenson (1911 - 1980)

link

Our character...is an omen of our destiny, and the more integrity we have and keep, the simpler and nobler that destiny is likely to be.
George Santayana

"Skunkworks is not the armpit of the Universe."

-NGC2736

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

-George Carlin-
blogzarro.com...?fk

A few others.

[edit on 24-12-2007 by Rasobasi420]

“I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.”

Steve Martin

"if you lie down with dog's

you'll get up with fleas!"

my dad

Run for the hills, its the loch ness otter.

Legalizer.

This is too funny.

Regards,
Lex

"The most reliable proof that there are extraterrestrial intelligent lifeforms out there is that nobody actually tries to get in contact with us." -Dirk Mueller


"Your mind is like a parachute. It works best when open." -Matthias Elter

Cicero:
The function of wisdom is to discriminate between good and evil.

I once felt a person.

The most popular variation of Oscar Wilde's last words: "Either the wallpaper goes, or I go." (For history's sake, they both went -- Wilde first and then the wallpaper; also, there are squabbles over whether or not he actually said it a couple of weeks prior to his death.)

President Merkin Muffley: "Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room."
--Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb

Kilgore: "Charlie don't surf!"
--Apocalypse Now

Shaun: "The pigs got Grandma."
--John from Cincinnati

/tn.

"He's not called Spider Pig any more - now he's Harry Plopper"
Homer (the yellow modern day one)

I know this has a deep and spiritual meaning but for the life of me.........

George Carlin

again....

> MY NEXT LIFE
>
> By George Carlin
>
> I want to live my next life backwards:
>
> You start out dead and get that out of the way.
>
> Then you wake up in a nursing home feeling better every day
>
> Then you get kicked out for being too healthy.
>
> Enjoy your retirement and collect your pension.
>
> Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day .
>
> You work 40 years until you're too young to work.
>
> You get ready for High School: drink alcohol, party, and you're
> generally promiscuous.
>
> Then you go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, and you
> have no responsibilities.
>
> Then you become a baby, and then...
>
> You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in
> spa-like conditions - central heating, room service on tap, and
> then...You finish off as an orgasm.
>
> I rest my case.

"Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end."


from an email stating- "The following is the 2007 winning entry from an annual contest at Texas A&M University calling for the most appropriate definition of a contemporary term. This year's term was Political Correctness."

"And now for something completely different." There are too many Monty Python quotes. Ooo I want to find the simplified script and read it yay.