Obesity 'not individuals' fault'

As someone who is very overweight, I can speak to a different side of the health facts on this issue. I used to be underweight for my height and the fact that I am a big framed person. The way to tell if you are big framed as in having large bones, is to grasp your wrist, if you have a large wrist bone then you are big framed.

Though I will tell you I am fat now, when I was skinny I still could not get a 7 inch bracelet to fit due to my large wrists. I went to a weight clinic and based on their measurements I was classified to have a large frame.

So, I used to work full time as a nurse's aide in a nursing home (a very physically demanding job), walk 3.5 miles home (didn't drive) and come in and head out to the tobacco fields and work until dark, then cook, clean and do the same thing the next day.

It was grueling, during this period of time in my life when most people would have been losing weight, I gained 35 lbs in one year. I went to the dr. and found out I have hypothyroidism and that means that my thyroid is slowed and that controls your metabolism which controls how fast your body burns calories. At that time without medication to have lost weight I would have had to run ten miles a day and drink water only.

I was eventually put on a high dosage of thyroid meds, but by the time they got me on the right dosage (they start out small dose and then slowly add to it and test every three months), I was already 75 lbs. overweight.

I was still working and walking like before but now I added a routine 1 hr. a day exercise program into my life and yes for the record I was eating healthy, we were too poor to go to fast food restaurants often and we grew our own food, so we ate a lot of veggies and meat and fruits. I still gained weight.

Then I hurt my back and had to quit working per doctors orders, surgery was not an option or believe me I would have had it and I was no idiot I went to the most highly recommended neurosurgeon in my area and i got more than one opinion. The pain at times is so painful that it is hard to live. Meds of course help, but that only adds to the drugged up vegged out state.

So now I went from a healthy individual with thyroid and weight problems who could and did exercise to a physically disabled person who could barely walk at times, there were periods during the worst of it to actually needing someone to walk on each side of me to help me stand and walk. I was practically bedridden for two months.

The weight kept piling on despite the fact that my diet was still a healthy diet and I was not overeating since I was only eating breakfast, a bowl of cereal and supper, the kids were at school, hubby was at work and I was not capable of climbing the stairs to get to the kitchen to get any lunch. And friends are never around when you need them the most, at least my friends never have been.

Right now I still eat a healthy diet, we live 35 miles from the fast food places in our area and very seldom eat at one of these places when we are in town, unless we are starving and in a hurry, otherwise we go to a restaurant that serves real food.

Hubby who has always been slim, never anymore than maybe 10 lbs. overweight, wears a size 34 waist jeans, found out just as he slipped into the 36 waist jeans that he was developing diabetes, so we modified our diet even more and I was a tyrant about it and I also was a good wife and only ate the types and amount of foods he could eat, mostly because cooking two different types of meals is difficult and I did not feel like doing that. I did not cheat and stuck to the diet, but I know for a fact hubby cheated on occassion and would sneak in a hamburger and maybe a candy bar about every three weeks. He told me he did this after the fact.

He lost so much weight in six weeks that people were worried he was sick with some awful disease, I on the other hand did not lose a pound.

Right now I qualify for the weight loss surgery, but the insurance will not pay for it and I can't pay for it out of pocket, I wish I could. I have arthritis in both of my knees due to carrying all of the extra weight, on my worst days I have to use a cane to walk, when I shop I use the buggy like a walker and lean on it to walk.

I am not a lazy overeating person as most people assume, I have been made fun of by strangers and mistreated by skinny designers, who offer me the same cut just larger made clothes in the worst fabrics possible.

BTW if there is anyone who thinks it is funny to make fun of fat people you best not do it within their sight or hearing, the last young male (easily 25 years of age and should have known better) was not laughing too much when I confronted him. I think I actually scared him, maybe it was hubby who is an ex-marine and still looks like one. Of course hubby was not in the aisle with me when the young man decided for a laugh to make cow noises at me. It took me a few minutes to figure out why he doing this, I thought something was wrong with him, and it was not until he left the aisle did I realize that he was not mentally impaired in some way, he was just a jerk.

Honestly I am not a mean confrontational person, (never been in any kind of trouble), but for someone to attack me for absolutely no reason other than the fact that society still considers it ok to make fun of fat people and he thought he could get away with it, and only did it to show off in front of his girlfriend or wife made me so angry I was willing in those moments to kick his cowardly butt and go to jail for it. So for your own safety don't make fun of fat people, even a sick old fat arthritic, peace loving woman like me can still pick up a can of corn out of her buggy and hit you upside the head if you make her mad enough. Though I didn't, that little boy still left real quick, he is very lucky I never told hubby what he did.

Wow, sounds like quite an ordeal.

Though I was never very big, I did develop a gut that stuck out. People in the cafeteria would walk by me so closely that they'd hit my stomach with their shoulder. And...they'd do it as if they were entitled - or that I was taking up more than my allotment of space. Of course I blamed myself. At the time, I didn't realize what was wrong with my diet. (I worked in IT food services, for one thing, ) As soon as I figured out what it was, I fixed it. So was it my fault that they were feeding us all this cr*p? (we were expected to test out patient diets for some of our lunches).

This kind of story, though, is why I urge people that even if they don't diet, they should consider tracking what they do eat. It's free, it's online, it's even fun.

I think one reason people feel they are not over eating yet still can't lose is that:
1. they don't have any idea what their maintenance calories are for their size, and
2. they don't realize their diet contains some very high caloric food, and they're unaware of their current intake.

So tracking, even without dieting, gives you a tool to use. Remember even though it's initially scary to track your calories, Knowledge is Power.

The big innovation is that it's no longer difficult to track your calories and diet. There's been a big jump in technology with the advent of sites like Fitday.

Anyway, you have my sympathies and certainly my empathy.

Good luck!

reply to post by goose


You are a very admirable person. Thyroid problems are another common issue that causes a person to gain weight with no fault of their own.

What I have observed about many people that make fun of fat people such as myself are not exactly prizes themselves. I have never been made fun of by a person who is health conscience. In a matter of fact, the last time I was made fun of for being fat, I was at the social security office to get a copy of my social security card. There was this woman who was obvioulsy on something. She couldn't sit still, she was way too skinny, she kept rubbing her nose and chattering her teeth (the tell tale signs of a meth addict) and she had the nerve to say to her lover as I walked by "There goes another fat one!"

I wanted to turn to her and say "There goes another meth addict" but I decided to take the higher road and just keep walking.

reply to post by budski


Obesity 'not individuals' fault'

What a stupid statement this is !!

This is how simple it really is:

If you eat more calories then you burn, you gain weight.
If you burn more calories then you eat, you lose weight.

These 2 things are completely under the control of everyone unless of course they're force fed or starved. To state that it's not the individuals fault is irresponsible at best and dangerous at worst.

reply to post by jfj123


In a nutshell, that is essentially correct, but is missing some key elements, such as thyroid disorder, or naturally slow metabloic rate.

The point is that some people have to work a LOT harder to rid themselves of excess calories - I think it's a bit dangerous and ignorant to just lump all people who have weight problems together in a sweeping generalization.