older people who think they own the world

in case you didn't know, I'm seventeen and about a month ago some guy twice my age came to my door and started yelling in my face "your daughter is out of control and needs to be stopped", first of all i don't have a daughter as i am seventeen i corrected him "she hit my son in the face with a shovel", my sister is twelve, his son was fifteen. then I find out he is at the wrong house, my sister didn't do anything, he said something like kathrin, that isn't my sisters name. I corrected him AGAIN, and i notid and told him this, he then poked me hard in the chest, spat in my face and called my a not nice word, so i dropped him, one punch in the face, can anyone tell me if i did the wrong thing


note: i would have posted this sooner but I forgot to :shk:

AHAHAH. That is hilarious. Honestly, that punch in the face will probably make him go home and tell his wife "That girl's dad is violent too! We should call child services!" It's extremely hard to control yourself when a guy spits on your face, but yes you did do the wrong thing, in my opinion.

You should've threatened to call the cops because the man was attacking you on your property, but I can see why you wanted to punch him in the face and that's pretty brave of you, so I give you props for that, ahaha.

Wow. What a tard!

If you're 17, you're a minor and for an adult to physically strike a minor is a pretty bad infraction. You probably should have called the police and filed a complaint.

Then I bet he'd have felt the idiot he really was and left you alone in the future.

No outrider, you did not do the right thing.
Obviously he was an violent person, looking for a confrontation.
If you are not playing macho, you are extremely lucky he didn't pull out
a pistol and blow you away, or stick a knife in your eye, or mace you down
and kick the livin **** out of you.

Now he may have your number and be out to get you.
Crazy people almost always think of or seek revenge.

Your macho BS, may have bought you more trouble than you can handle at 17teen. Better tell mommy and daddy.

You know what, I think you did something that at the time is fine, I didnt see it happen so I dont know, but he could have done more, you were just defending yourself, at this point, if anything else happens, call the police, but IMO, he deserved the punch.

The punch in the face was deserved. I'd just make sure your parents know about this, and maybe call the police. You're a minor, and technically he did attack you first on your property. You were defending yourself.

That guy sounds like a real jackass. I wonder what his son did to warrant getting hit in the face with a shovel...

reply to post by outrider


I here ya. I recently got into a car accident with a guy who blew a stop sign while making a left at a T intersection. It was nothing serious, but this older fellow was quick to try and intimidate me, as if it was my fault he totally blew a stop sign. A brief yelling match ensued until the officer showed up. Of course the cop told him it was 100 percent his fault, and his face turned so red after that!(not to mention it was his wife's car) I guess he was just assuming I would not be able to articulate my thoughts under a stressful situation.

It just seems there is a minority of older people who just assume younger folks are always wrong. It's something I have personally learned to recognize quickly and just try to deal with the situation accordingly. Your never going to change their attitudes, maybe they just wish they were young again like us.

well why does everyone except a select few think i did the wrong thing, i would like some more feedback on this, it confounds me to no end when you say i did the wrong thing

Originally posted by outrider
well why does everyone except a select few think i did the wrong thing, i would like some more feedback on this, it confounds me to no end when you say i did the wrong thing

Maybe it has something to do with that you didn't consider the consequences of hitting another; even if they did deserve it.

What if that person you hit burns your house down, or shoots someone you love in a fit of rage. Will the satisfaction you get from your punch be worth it then?

You are just a kid trying to prove how tough you are. You don't even know what tough is and I hope you never find out. IT can get real ugly; take it from one who has been thru hell.

I for one am not impressed with your macho BS. It's obvious that you are fishing for comments like "you are so manly and bad and so strong" Well amigo, I just don't see it that way. Sorry.

I guess I'm just one of those older people that had a little life experiences dealing with psychotic people. I don't own the world by the way but my little piece of paradise is paid off.

[edit on 15-10-2007 by whaaa]

[edit on 15-10-2007 by whaaa]

well, you did the WRONG thing.
the guy put his hands on you. what you should have done is struck him in the throat with the webbing between your thumb and first finger.
if it was a week ago, then he would just about now be getting to the point where he can swallow without pain.

it is not acceptable for people to put their hands on you....

of course you did the right thing....keep in mind, the right thing is not always the smart thing as dude could have got up and took you to the street.

sure, you could have called the cops but you would have sat there for a half hour telling them what happened, only for nothing to happen.

someone putting their hands on you is crossin the line. plus you said he spit on you.

what else are you suposed to to?
let people hit you and knock you around?

i say good for you.

reply to post by whaaa



i also can't say i disagree with some of this post.

that said, what if he called the cops and by some mirale the cops went over to brace the guy?
whats to stop him from burning down the house?

as i said, at least IMO, the 'right' thing is not always the smart thing...know what i mean?

for me, there are just certain things i can not or will not accept and someone touching me is one of them.
i am not some kid. i am married and have a child of my own.
same rules apply to them as well.
nobody else has the right to put their hands on them.

You did the wrong thing, not that it is wrong for you to defend yourself, but what this man was doing was as simple as turnng around and closing the door. Violent solutions to any situation should always be a last resort not the first. Because all violence does is beget more violence. you had to many options availble to you to justify hitting the guy sorry.

You had the right to defend yourself. I see it as the guy was leading up to punching on you, as he tested your defense mechanisms. Besides punching his face, you should have called the cops in and had him arrested for assault and battery for poking and spitting on you.

Apparently he woke up and came to his senses since no cops showed up to cuff and question you.

Forgive me, but this sounds more like a:

"this is what I should have done in hindsight, because I am so pissed off right now"

I'm speaking of the part where you dropped him.

But, if this IS a completely true story.
I would say that you did something that was within your rights.
You embarrassed an older guy..No cops were involved. NO ONE officially knows of this altercation

Which leads me back to:
"this is what I should have done in hindsight, because I am so pissed off right now"

Except now..the guy, with the black eye is thinking it.
I hope he doesn't live nearby..

Originally posted by outrider
well why does everyone except a select few think i did the wrong thing, i would like some more feedback on this, it confounds me to no end when you say i did the wrong thing

I think it's because we're far older and have much more experience with the way the world works than you do (not intending to be snippy, just being blunt), including the justice system. Or, more properly, the INjustice system.

He could have called the cops on YOU. He's the one with the bruises. You could be facing assault charges yourself. It would have been his word (guy with the black eye) against yours (the guy with no marks on him).

Discretion is the better part of valor. This is something you'll learn as you go along, hopefully without too much collateral damage to yourself or to others.

Of course you did the wrong thing. You should've found the girl with the shovel and paid her to tune him up.

All I have to say on this subject is violence begets violence. Let the police handle matters like this. Obviously he was baligerent (sp?) and was looking for a fight. He didn't even stop to find out if it was the right house.

reply to post by outrider



Why was it the wrong thing to do? Sure the guy was a jackass of epic proportions, but he's also, from your description, someone with violent tendencies. Punching him out, while momentarily satisfying, also could trigger him to do something rather more violent as retaliation. People like him tend to escalate issues.

The next time might involve something other than a poke to the chest and a not nice word or two. You might want to consider that if there is a next time. Situations like this one are why there are cops.

There's really no shame in backing away if given the chance. Very few people are going to think badly of you for attempting to defuse a situation.

Originally posted by outrider
well why does everyone except a select few think i did the wrong thing, i would like some more feedback on this, it confounds me to no end when you say i did the wrong thing

The answer to the above question is the same as the answer to your original question, and the answer is experience.

We older people have just plain seen more. We understand consequences, having witnessed the process of cause and effect more than you have. We have learned to think more long range than you do. We have seen more combinations and permutations of trouble than you even know exists yet.

You also must remember that every one of us can look back and see how stupid and ignorant we ourselves were when we were your age. We expect the same stupidity and ignorance from you. Don't take it personally.

You do have the right to defend yourself. Did this situation call for it? I wasn't there so can't say. Was it a smart thing or a wise thing to do? I don't think so. Violence should be a last resort. It sounds like you still had other options.

You should pay attention to many of the things that the other posters have said. Violence does return violence in a karmic sense. This guy might be crazy and escalate it. He might use the system to get revenge by lying on you to the police. As was wisely pointed out, he's got the physical damage if anyone does and he is an adult which means that the very same "own the world" factor will slap you again as the adult police believe what he says over what you, the kid, says. Yeah, that kind of thing can happen and yes, people can be that vendictive and petty.

It would have cost you nothing, except maybe a little pride, to just back up and shut the door. It would not have made the situation any worse, but could have made it better by diffusing it or making him commit to it. If he breaks your door down, you have physical proof and ironclad justification to do whatever it takes to subdue him.

Here is some advice from one of the "owners"

Don't go looking for trouble. Understand that it's already looking for you. Make it work hard to find you and then beat the hell out of it when it does.

well, i have a short temper, period. That I held on that long without hitting him is an amazing act in and of itself, ive done so much worse than hit an addault, but were not talking about that are we, anyway my entire life i have been picked on and made fun of, people have spat in my face almost every day and this guy was no exception to my, yes MY rules, which are as follows, 1. dont try to agravate me, 2. dont make fun of me, my family or anyone i know, 3. dont come into physical contact with me with hostile intent, those are basicly my three rules, he broke all three and I got a little angry, can this shead a little more light on my little problem?