man spiritual evolution

I am not a Christian, not a Jew, not a Muslim, not a Buddhist, not an atheist or follow any other religions.
My being is full of anger and confuse with joy. What we hear what we smell what we see is only an illustration of what we understand with what our mind is capable of interpreting. When I was a child and I was been taught in class room about the history of the world, I remember that all of this was not making any since. Incoherence in the chronology of history was so obvious to me. I have struggled about it since then, not any of my friend or family members really understand what I mean about discrepancy in the way the history of the world has been tolled.
Out side the class room long after I left school I have find many scholars' and writers' that actually where in the pursuit of the true history of the world.
From Plato, to Shakespeare via Bacon to Eckhart, I have found vast rays of dotes that still today I have difficulty to joined.
The purpose of this post is to engage in a discussion about what really happen in the past, what really shaped the ancient world from roman antiquity to middle age Europe passing threw Arab civilization and Asian influence.
I do believe that in the mist of the ancient world to today world we may be able to unfold the mother of all secret conspiracy theory which in my view could embrace all religions, politic and civilization of this planet.
I know that it is a very wide topic but I am sure we could just narrow it threw what many people here on ATS have read or watched (books or Video).
If my post is of any interest to some then I will invite you to read this below. This was written by a German thirteenth-century mystic.

"I pray to God to rid me of God.
If myself were not, God would not be either.
If I were not, God would not be God.
God is within, we are without.
The eye through which I see God and the eye through which God sees me is the same eye."


This sound very modern and yet it is thought and written by a clergyman long time a go. This is the heart of my post, things happen in the world where we can see advancement in a world where time frame is in contradictory with man spiritual evolution. It is not like we going forward one generation, backwards an other or stagnant in some, but it seems like a total chaos with no visible evolution stream.
I invite you to post your confusion about world history, what you have felt that didn’t make since to you in the way it has been taught.
I hope we can engage in some kind of inspire discussion.

Kacou.