I must eliminate all emotion,lest I feel something...I may have to feel it all
Stone cold, defeated
I long to dissolve.There is no compassion left for one such as I
And in reality,I should not expect there to be.
Very heartfelt words, I feel your pain.
I can empathize in how you feel, I have been through two years in hell, then meant someone that I thought saw things the way I do. That someone I gave
all my heart too, something I have never done in my 45 years of life. I was always on guard because I grew up in the ghetto and knew how cruel people
That someone I thought was my soulmate, the one I thought to be my mirror, ended up being the most vindictive person I have ever meant.
I have come through the other side though. Now I am ready to try and live again. Sometimes the bad things in life that seem unbearable to get through
happen for hidden reasons we cannot see until we reach past the present and see the bigger picture.
You will come out of this stronger and a bit wiser (not to be confused with Budweiser lol) and if you see it as an experience in life that had to
happen, and learn from it without becoming jaded then you have succeeded in moving forward in your Karmic journey of lifes lessons for the soul.
Goodluck, and love and light, Brian
If you feel a need to talk to someone that feels the same way, please feel free to u2u me.
S'alright Ducky...at least you didn't BLIND ME WITH SCIENCE...
So now I'm feelin' kinda eighties,still down,still missing him,and hating myself for it.So to match my new black hair...and my leather pants...
Actually-I dressed like this in the 80's,black hair and all....my high school nickname was Joan Jett.
Behold the glass menagerie
Delicate and sublime
She glistens in her golden hours
With beauty rich and fine.
Admire the glass menagerie
How frail its art design
Breathe not the whisperings of your heart
Lest its polished crystal sigh.
How sad the glass menagerie
Refined on shelves it sits
A rarity of treasures seen
Yet senseless prize, unfit.
"Unfit! the glass menagerie"
Its hollow core echoes
Unleashing not passions desire
Encaging the priceless soul.
Come see the glass menagerie
How silently it falls
Crashing with never a sound to the ground
Exposing its broken remains.
I am the glass menagerie
Naked, unveiled to all.
Lament for the fragmented toy of a girl
And the woman she never will be.
We've all been there, AD. You're not alone. Right here for ya if you need a friend.
Oh, whitewave...that was beautiful...and so fitting.Thank you so much.It speaks to me in ways you would not believe.
In my life..I never really dealt with a bad situation when it happened.In my mind(metaphorically speaking) I had a big shelf full of glass jars.Just
like grandma's preserves.In each jar was an incident that made me sad...and I didn't want to feel it..so I put it in a jar..on that shelf..and got
on with it.Well recently something big happened that made me very sad.And when I tried to put that event in a jar..I found my shelf was full..and it
all came crashing down at once.Shattered fragments of memories every where that cut worse than glass.I cried for a very long time...and literally
wanted to disappear.
But when you hit bottom..there is no where to go but up.My friends here..and my family..pulled me out of a very dark place.I refuse to put up another
shelf..and there will be no more jars.I will deal with life as it comes, whether I want to or not.
Change is the only constant in this world...and I cannot change the past..only move forward and be a better person for it.Life is about knowledge and
experience, and out of this event in my life I gained both.
Some very wise words given to me by a friend...Thank you Sphinx...
"Isolation does not exist. We are born alone and will die alone. there is no one to safe you from it. No one will. The only one you can depend on is
yourself. If you reshape the expectations you have, you can live easier.
If you do find people that are like minded, want to help or care it is more of a gift aswell, but one should never expect it.
Disappointment in people is your own 'mistake': you can't expect people to be better than they are. That is not fair. They are what they are. Even
if they could and should be better persons. Don't blame them for not being that. It will hurt them and won't help them be(come) the person you hoped
they would be.
I made the mistake and hurt someone bad. Even if it was meant well, and caused by that person hurting me to begin with. I blamed them for not being a
better person. And that made things worse, because they obviously could not be a better person yet. I just made them feel guilty about it and then
they were worse
I learned. but it was a high price, hurting someone like that. There is a difference between drawing the line for oneself and demanding someone else
to change the behaviour when they can not"
Words to live by.....
Iam guilty of doing this very thing.I expected more from someone than they were willing to give....and I lost someone I care for very much.I will
always hurt badly because of my own mistake...and I hope sometime he will forgive me.....
Hey AD, i have no songs to post but then again perhaps i like other genres hehehe but the fact is, yes, you have friends, some near and some far but
you have a friend indeed in me. I do not know you THAT well but i know you and you deserve a smile and hug a day to help keep the blues away and read
this today and again tomorrow and know that a hug and smile is on its way.
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