PICK ME!!! PICK ME!!! I WANT THOSE POINTS!!!

"My wife is so fat that she took up two seats on the airplane..... and BOTH of them were window seats!"


[edit on 8/30/07 by HaveSeen4Myself]

D: I'm telling ya squeeze it out slowly and no one will know.

D: So I think next convention I'm gonna have super hero suits made up for us You can be A, I can be T, and Lear can be the S.

S: (thought) can't hold it any longer, I can just blame Dave.

D: Look get over it Little House on the Prairie didn't go well with the convention.

D: I know you wanted the door prize I promise I'll buy you a whopper later.

Dave: I just can't resist - maybe it's the glasses on the shirt, i dunno - PLEASE, just give me ONE chance Springer-poo

Dave: I TOLD you I'd give you a pile driver if you didn't share your ice cream.

Dave: look, I wont lie to you - there is some attraction there, but it doesn't have to get weird or anything

"Have you accepted John Lear into your heart as your personal saviour? Let us pray."

Dave: So, I had this idea. All us ATS staff should grow mullets!

Dave: ok ok i got it this time - A for Above, T for Top and S for...... Shoe?
Springer: ugh, try again Dave

Dave: You will NEVER guess what i just heard... there were TWO shooters!

"I gotta tell ya Springer, I heard about this thing called Serpo ..."

"No Springer, O'Hare airport is NOT in Washington."

"You could have just saved $342 on your car insurance by switching to Geico."

"You are ....... NOT THE FATHER!"

Ok enough of the ones that have absolutely nothing to do with ATS.

"I'm telling you Springer, all we need is 5 cans of Crisco, 3 tube socks, a tomato and a 12 foot length of rope. THIS COULD WORK!!"

Dave: Just checked the site - they're STILL going with the bloody captions

"So, I was thinking, how do we generate more traffic on a website? That's right! So we could have the ATS playmate of the month. A forum for conspiracy related erotica. We already have chat, we just need to dirty it up a little..."

Originally posted by Dave Rabbit

DAVE: Just two more, pretty please!!! One on each cheek?
Springer: I told ya I am done with that stuff, go talk to John!!!

Springer your're a two pint screamer!
Ya drank the wobbly pop in a crop
and mumbled something like "Gort! Klaatu barada Hooters!"
Sorry Bud but, "You are the starchilds Earth Father!"

Dude, its not like we have'nt done this before.

"Look, I understand that booking Miss Teen South Carolina as the keynote speaker seemed like a good idea at the time, but..."

[edit on 30-8-2007 by Tuning Spork]

You have two options, crying is not one of them.!!

Dave: Im sorry I stole and maxed out your credit cards dude, but I saw that ad in the paper for "buy one get one free" on tin foil and I just kinda blacked out.


Dave: I was talking on my cell phone and uhhh.....well you know. Im sure the tow man can get your car out of the pool.


Dave: I have a deep dark secret that I have to tell to someone and it might as well be you. Im Elvis Presley.


Springer: My head hurts.
Dave: It's these shirts, the're from China. I have been injecting myself with small amounts of every chemical and poison I know of over the past decade to raise my tolerance levels, so I feel fine.


Dave: The third rule of fight club is "If someone says "stop" or goes limp, taps out, the fight is over."
Springer: (to himself) Not the Tyler Durden personality again...^%#*^!...it was just a movie...why dont he listen to me?


Dave: Three jelly beans up your nose and noone dared you to do it? Can you smell the flavors?

[edit on 30/8/07 by Pfeil]