President Chokes Back Laughter During Space Policy Speech

Bush: "America Must Probe Uranus"; President Chokes Back Laughter During Space Policy Speech
January 16, 2004
Satire by David Albrecht

WASHINGTON, 16 January, 2004 � President George W. Bush called for a return to American manned space flight in a speech before NASA employees and members of Congress. He called for a permanent space base on the Moon and for an eventual manned flight to Mars.

But the president's goals did not end with two of Earth's closest neighbors. "We don't know where the journey will end. But we do know that it's time for human beings to enter the Solar System. To that end, I'm proposing a complete manned survey of the planets and their major satellites. This generation has a rendezvous with Pluto and a mission to Mercury. It's time to take a gander at Ganymede. Finally - and I can't stress this enough, America must probe Uranus."

The president then paused in his speech to choke back muffled laughter before spelling out some of the economic benefits of his ambitious proposal.


www.democraticunderground.com...

This is the kind of juvenile president we have. This guy is supposed to be an adult and he's still telling elementary school jokes---AND LAUGHING AT THEM. This guy is a moron. This is proof positive that the new "space policy" is a joke.

But, the morons called repugnants will fall for it---as usual.

I would have laughed too! That's funny, I can't believe he would tell that!

He would say that because he is still a child of negligible intellect.

And they say Nostradamus was a fraud!

Good thing he did choke it down, cause myself, along with documented others at that press conference, would have busted out laughing. I mean geezus Colonel, lighten up a bit...how would you like to be the one selected to probe URANUS?



regards
seekerof

That is histarical and Yes he is a moron.

But if I'm reading that correctly he made some major mistakes in that speech which I think proves he is a moron.

1. Enter the Solar System? We are part of the Solar System already.

2. The planets and their satellites? First of all I didn't know other planet had satellites unless they are ours. He makes it sound like these satellites he reffers to belong to somebody else.

3. Haven't our scientists speculated that Pluto is just a star and not a planet?

4. He needs to probe his own uranus. (Sorry I just had to say that)

Now if I mistook any of this for what he said please let me know.

Mr. Mulder

I call for going back to space, it's not just the "repugnants". I don't think it is time yet to go back. (see Money or lack there of)

I do think there could have been a better way to phrase that, but I don't think it points to the space pogram as a joke.

Originally posted by Seekerof

Good thing he did choke it down, cause myself, along with documented others at that press conference, would have busted out laughing. I mean geezus Colonel, lighten up a bit...how would you like to be the one selected to probe URANUS?

regards
seekerof

The sheer fact that he treats the whole subject as a kid joke provbes that his words are a farce.

A moon is a satellite.

Originally posted by mrmulder
2. The planets and their satellites? First of all I didn't know other planet had satellites unless they are ours. He makes it sound like these satellites he reffers to belong to somebody else.

Satellite is a term for an orbital body around a planet. So Mars has 2 satellites, Jupiter 62 last time I checked, Earth 1, etc.

3. Haven't our scientists speculated that Pluto is just a star and not a planet?

A star? Not in the past 50 years, they haven't. They've questioned if it might be a huge asteroid or a comet, but current speculation is that it is, in fact, a planet.


Now if I mistook any of this for what he said please let me know.

Mr. Mulder

Hope this helps!

America must probe Uranus

I kind of felt he's done that with his presidency, hehe....

Originally posted by junglejake

Originally posted by mrmulder
2. The planets and their satellites? First of all I didn't know other planet had satellites unless they are ours. He makes it sound like these satellites he reffers to belong to somebody else.

Satellite is a term for an orbital body around a planet. So Mars has 2 satellites, Jupiter 62 last time I checked, Earth 1, etc.

Oh, that's interesting. I never heard of that term used before in that fasion.

3. Haven't our scientists speculated that Pluto is just a star and not a planet?

A star? Not in the past 50 years, they haven't. They've questioned if it might be a huge asteroid or a comet, but current speculation is that it is, in fact, a planet.

Really? Okay. Guess I was mistaken. Thanks.

Hope this helps!

That does help. Thank you.

I guess everyone including Colonel missed a very important part of the originating post. Take a look again:

Bush: "America Must Probe Uranus"; President Chokes Back Laughter During Space Policy Speech
January 16, 2004
Satire by David Albrecht

Nice try there Klink.

Better luck next time.

LOL I missed that! Good catch, Fry!

BTW.....the earth has 2 moons. The other is called Cruithne. Its about 3 Km wide and not visible to the naked eye.

Originally posted by DjNothing
BTW.....the earth has 2 moons. The other is called Cruithne. Its about 3 Km wide and not visible to the naked eye.

link?! Never heard about that guy!

Originally posted by Fry2
I guess everyone including Colonel missed a very important part of the originating post. Take a look again:

Bush: "America Must Probe Uranus"; President Chokes Back Laughter During Space Policy Speech
January 16, 2004
Satire by David Albrecht

Nice try there Klink.

Better luck next time.

Very good eye

Originally posted by junglejake

Originally posted by DjNothing
BTW.....the earth has 2 moons. The other is called Cruithne. Its about 3 Km wide and not visible to the naked eye.

link?! Never heard about that guy!

Ask and you shall receive

www.space.com...

Originally posted by Fry2
I guess everyone including Colonel missed a very important part of the originating post. Take a look again:

Bush: "America Must Probe Uranus"; President Chokes Back Laughter During Space Policy Speech
January 16, 2004
Satire by David Albrecht

Nice try there Klink.

Better luck next time.

Ok, you got me. I did indeed miss that part in my zeal for attacking Bush. However, Bush is still an ass. Repugnants still suck and you're still a Nazi.

I like this quote at the end of the page...

However, President Bush responded to critics of his proposal by stressing the diplomatic benefits of such a plan, particularly in the case of a mission to Mars. "It's critical that we establish diplomatic relations with John Carter, Tardos Mors and the freedom-loving red people of Helium," he stated. "The barbaric Tharks and Warhoons must understand that their multi-armed, thoat-riding aggression against the other races of Mars will not stand."

Don't worry about it Colonel. You're still The Man. Well, not "The Man"...but...you know what I mean. I'll shut up now...