Originally posted by Lost_Mind
reply to post by Texas_Longhorn
Is there a way you might be able to kind of "gauge" your sons level of fear for us. I would think that for your son to react to something like he
has he would have had to have had a somewhat prolonged and very close encounter with this object/event. . . .
It would nearly have to be an "intimate" encounter for him to draw any kind of long term memory based fear, certainly a fear based on something very
real, at least to him. He would have to have been in the presence of an unknown, percieved as threatening and out of the norm long enough for him to
realize that it might be dangerous to him in some way.
This psychologist thinks you are absolutely correct.
And, it sounds like either he doesn't want to remember the specifics enough to talk about them as they are too frightening to remember THAT MUCH
he is concerned he'd be ridiculed in some way. I'm thinking probably more the former.
Here are some questions for the boy:
1. Son, how many times--can you guess how many times you have seen the shield?
2. How many times have you seen creatures like the one you drew in the back yard?
3. Did such creatures touch you?
4. Did they do anything with you?
5. Did they take you anywhere?
6. What did they do that frightened you?
7. Did they hurt you? If so, how?
8. What feelings did you feel when you saw the shield or creatures? Cold, hot; sad, happy; rough or sharp vs smooth; . . . . what did you feel?
9. What did you see with your eyes?
10. What did you see with your mind?
11. What did you hear with your ears?
12. What did you hear in your mind?
13. Did you see the shield or the creatures in the morning, afternoon, evening? Which?
14. Have you had any dreams about the shield/creatures?
15. Have you seen the creatures in your bedroom when you were not dreaming?
16. How have such dreams or visits begun?
17. How have they ended?
NOW, DAD, I realize that these are leading questions in some respects. Deliberately so. I'm not interested in research about the phenomena here. I'm
interested in helping your son.
Wording questions this way GIVES YOUR SON PERMISSION, MORE COMFORT to own such things. He sounds like a very bright fellow but also sensitive. The
more permission and support he feels from DAD, I believe the more he will be able to communicate comfortably and specifically.
He must be terrified. Very terrified. Please avoid underestimating or dismissing or minimizing or pooh-poohing his fears in any way to any degree. No
need to maximize them either but just treat them matter of factly would be my encouragement.
I would also communicate that--IF YOU CAN HONESTLY SAY THIS--THAT YOU WILL DO ALL YOU CAN TO HELP STOP SUCH EVENTS and to rid your home and yard of
such a fear inducing presence.
maybe more thoughts later . . .