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Where can I join the NWO, UFO Division?

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posted on May, 17 2007 @ 02:16 PM
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I’d like to sign up for the New World Order in the Black Ops UFO division, which is why I posted here insted of the NWO site specifically. I’d rather not do the neo-fascist thing, but Capitalist Masonic Pig Dog would be fine with me. My grandfather was a Mason, and I know he would have encouraged me to join had he not died before I was born. I’m cool with it. I’ve heard so many good things about the NWO that I think it’s time for me to make my contribution to the greater good. Does anyone know how to submit an application? I mean, do the Men in Black monitor this board looking for recruits, or maybe the top secret black ops guys? I don’t know, of course, but I’m assuming they must, so I thought I’d just ask them right here since their phone number is, like, unlisted.

Look, I’m well qualified. I have a lifetime of experience in both conspiracies, UFOs, and bureaucracies. I’m computer literate and height/weight proportionate. I don’t smoke. I lean conservative and I’m a loyal American. I feel my education, experience, and loyalty qualify me as a commissioned officer. Considering that time is of the essence here (I’m no spring chicken), I suggest you start me off as, say, a Lieutenant Colonel. I’m not asking to set policy or anything, but I’d like to contribute at a meaningful level and I simply do not have the time to work up through the ranks. I’m a pretty good mission specialist. Just give me direction and I’ll get the job done whatever it is. Once you see my resume you’ll understand what I’m talking about. Eventually I’d like to join the General Staff. I know I have to prove myself first, but I wanted you to know I have goals. Oh, also! I’ve had a Secret Clearance before, so we don’t have to start from scratch.

So if you would just contact me off ATS (no U2Us, please), which should be easy enough for folks like you. I’m not really hiding, but I don’t want to deal with the cranks. I mean, I’ve got Caller ID on purpose. Other than that I’m easy to find. Contact me and I’ll point you to my online resume (if you haven’t found it already) and we can go from there. There’s a big open field directly in front of my house (see Google Earth to verify), so if you are restricted to, shall we say, more exotic means of travel, it should be no problem. You could always just drive up in a black sedan and knock on the door. That would be okay, too. Don’t worry about the dog. He has a big bark, but he’s really harmless. If he knows who you are he’ll hide under the bed anyway. That’s what he did last time the cops showed up. (It was no big deal. I’ll tell you all about it.)

Oh, by the way, I don’t require payment except for expenses incurred. I’ll volunteer. I wanted you to know how serious I am about this. And I’m a pretty good shot.

Thanks. Looking forward to hearing from you soon.

P.S. I'm not kidding.



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 02:28 PM
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Yeah, maybe we can get you to infiltrate them, steal some of the tech and bring it back to us!

Oops did I say that in the forum?? Oh crap, they know the secret plan now! Abort, abort!



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 02:35 PM
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Originally posted by millerman
Yeah, maybe we can get you to infiltrate them, steal some of the tech and bring it back to us!


No, I really don't want to do that, millerman. There is no "we" getting "me" to do anything. I'm not trying to infiltrate them; I'm trying to join them. If I do get involved is some of the tech I will be using it against people like you. Your comment assumes I'm somehow on your side.

I'm not.

Cheers.

P.S. How did you get negative points? Just curious. Buy something?



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 02:37 PM
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Thanks, but...

We're not accepting any new applicants at this time. We're rather flush with minions, and the pipeline is backed up on indoctrinating the new recruits.

The NWO thanks you for your interest in becoming part of the world domination industry, and encourages you to inquire again in six months, as some openings may develop.

HR Monkeys, not just for that second interview anymore...



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 02:42 PM
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To the OP member, why not appeal directly to the aliens themselves since they run the show anyways. I always say if you want it easy and to win in this 'world' then why kiss heiney of people that are too low. Go directly to the top and go up faster?

Beware, you will become their slave and not just for this lifetime or several more to come at that.



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 03:09 PM
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schuyler,
It's only fair to inform you -- but you never mentioned that your head is superior to regular ones in that you can blow into your ear and also make a sound like a train whistle.

Therefore, unfortunately, you fall short of qualifying as an agent for the NWO but don't despair! I heard there's a management position opening at a company that just might be what you are looking for! Check it out!

www.primatechpaper.com...



PS -- let us know how the interview went ok?








[edit on 17-5-2007 by Palasheea]



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 03:31 PM
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Originally posted by schuyler
No, I really don't want to do that, millerman. There is no "we" getting "me" to do anything. I'm not trying to infiltrate them; I'm trying to join them. If I do get involved is some of the tech I will be using it against people like you. Your comment assumes I'm somehow on your side.

I'm not.


Wow, such hostility!


Well, I forgive you, even if you end up killing me.



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 03:39 PM
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Hi Schuyler,

Please fill up the application form and submit your application fee $ 7,777 for immediate effect.

Or you can join george bush club, he will do you in the back.

"It is not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country".



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 04:50 PM
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Originally posted by millerman
Well, I forgive you, even if you end up killing me.


Nah. That won't happen because of the multiple lifetime thing. It's only a temporary fix. (See below)


Originally by denythestatusquo
Beware, you will become their slave and not just for this lifetime or several more to come at that.


Yeah, I know about that. I was hoping to sign a contract that limited them to three lifetimes. That should give me enough experience. But I'd just as soon work with my own species because I still like girls and, you know, I can't be too explicit here. I was hoping for some fringe benefits.



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 04:59 PM
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climb the govvy ladder start out in air force or naval intelligence then apply to work at the pentagon youll need credintials like college diplomas in physics something like that anyway but the goverment doesnt like people that are as straight forward as you are



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 05:27 PM
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Originally posted by kontol
Hi Schuyler,

Please fill up the application form and submit your application fee $ 7,777 for immediate effect.

Or you can join george bush club, he will do you in the back.

"It is not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country".



George Bush can't even spell NWO



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 05:57 PM
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Originally posted by Cydonian Priest

George Bush can't even spell NWO


Hehehehe......... it is funny.

Sorry moderator for 1 liner.



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 06:13 PM
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Originally posted by Mirthful Me
The NWO thanks you for your interest in becoming part of the world domination industry, and encourages you to inquire again in six months, as some openings may develop.


Thanks, Mirthful, but I'm thinking you are not the real deal. I'm thinking maybe you are one of those disinformation specialist type people and that maybe you don't want this to get out that the MIB actually do pay attention here and actually are looking for a few good men, an army of one, people like me. If people actually knew they would all begging on here and we don't want to even see that. Ewwww!

And also, Mirthful, you claim to herd cats and I know that's just about impossible. I have four lilac point siamese and we all know who runs the household. Their faces look a lot like the grey aliens, and....Oh, wait just a minute here! Hmmmmm.



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 06:20 PM
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okay then army of one....what experience do you have as far as combat training......can you read a topographical map...do you know how to figure out how big a object is by estimating elevation......dont think that theyed come to you just cause you say you want to be in show them some intillegence theres other ways to get there attention then just saying there name



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 06:27 PM
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Originally posted by schuyler

I'm thinking maybe you are one of those disinformation specialist type people and that maybe you don't want this to get out that the MIB actually do pay attention here and actually are looking for a few good men, an army of one, people like me.


Yes, the covert/intelligence world most certainly has a presence on sites like these. Even if just to gauge how much people know.



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 06:38 PM
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Dealing reality and other popular card games...


Originally posted by schuyler
Thanks, Mirthful, but I'm thinking you are not the real deal. I'm thinking maybe you are one of those disinformation specialist type people and that maybe you don't want this to get out that the MIB actually do pay attention here and actually are looking for a few good men, an army of one, people like me.


Every keystroke, letter, number, punctuation mark... The very thoughts of each member are carefully logged here and scrutinized...



And also, Mirthful, you claim to herd cats and I know that's just about impossible. I have four lilac point siamese and we all know who runs the household. Their faces look a lot like the grey aliens, and....Oh, wait just a minute here! Hmmmmm.


Impossible for you maybe... You just lack the proper technique.

Rawhide Monkeys, not just for rounding them up, and moving them out anymore...



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 06:49 PM
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Originally posted by justanothergangster
okay then army of one....what experience do you have as far as combat training......can you read a topographical map...do you know how to figure out how big a object is by estimating elevation......dont think that theyed come to you just cause you say you want to be in show them some intillegence theres other ways to get there attention then just saying there name


You mean "their". Spelling counts with the MIB. I'm not going to answer any of your questions. I already said we would get to the resume stage and then they'd understand what I was talking about. This is just an inquiry to let them know I'm interested. I'll put it on monster.com and craigslist, too, in case they read those at their leisure. But you don't need to know. Security stuff is on a need to know basis, and you are out of the loop. Sorry, but the rest of this is taking place off ATS. We're not having a public interview here. Like my son, who has a pretty interesting job right now, likes to tell me, "I could tell you, Dad, but then I'd have to kill you!" Snicker, snicker. Yeah, I told him that for years so now he's just getting back at me.

I just consider joining the NWO kind of like the peace corps, but since the peace corps sucks, I've decided to share my expertise where it will do some good. It's really, for me at least, a public service issue.



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 06:56 PM
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ah, my dream job...... does the MIB have any need for large men to set on people when they try to escape?
cause that's about the only thing i would be good for!



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 06:56 PM
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your going to join a black ops branch of the military through monster.com...............................well....good luck with that



posted on May, 17 2007 @ 06:59 PM
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by theres other ways to get their attention i didnt mean monster.com go to google start digging around about the siprnet theyll talk to you



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