Do You Talk to Strangers?

When out and about, do you willingly talk to strangers?

Do you start conversations? Offer advice if it seems needed? Answer questions only? Avoid all stranger interactions completely?

I will talk to strangers, but it depends on the situation.

I live in Oakland, which is rife with alcoholic and cracked-out street bums not to mention just plain insane folk. There is a certain type of street person who will hit on anything female in hopes that they might get lucky.

If some random stranger, smelling like they haven't had a bath in three years, approaches me, I don't make eye contact and tend to leave quickly, especially when I have my kids with me -- my daughter will talk to anyone that talks to her. One guy had the nerve to stop and talk to her while I was getting the baby out of the car and actually grabbed her hand.

If I'm minding my own business and I hear "Miss? Excuse me, miss? Hey! Miss!" and similar noise that doesn't stop even when I ignore the person, I know they're going to ask for money or sex, neither of which I'm giving to a stranger.

If I see someone in obvious puzzlement over local rules or events (such as the elevators at the police station that go off at 6 p.m. every day) I will offer advice and speak to them uninvited, though sometimes this backfires and someone cranky goes off.

I find it easier to talk to strangers when my kids are present, but only the kind that are obviously sane and solvent, and who seemingly appreciate children.

I used to be painfully shy and found it difficult to talk to anyone. Now it doesn't bother me so much.

It really depends on the situation. I live in a fairly big city where every which way you look there are about a kajillion different people. I'm a pretty talkative guy and always trying to make new friends and chit chat, but I've noticed most people in the city don't appreciate people talking to them.

I do, however, frequent the suburbs and more rural areas of New England and try my best to talk to everyone I think may be wanting to talk. I try to flash a smile or give a nice compliment to people who are obviously having a bad day, simply because it really makes a huge difference when people do it to me

I come from a small community, and we are all guilty of talking to complete strangers on a daily basis. The extent of the conversations are normally gratuities between the two of us, but it is still an interaction. If I found myself waiting in a line, odds are a conversation would strike up among us waiting in the line. I can't help but talk to anyone who happens to around me. To ignore them, I couldn't help but feel rude or ignorant.

When I lived moved to larger cities; Calgary, Edmonton, Vancouver, Ottawa; I was given some harsh looks when I tried to politely say Hello to individuals who walked past. It was not a social norm in these larger cities, and to attempt to engage a complete stranger, well it didn't come across in the best light.

[edit on 25-4-2007 by chissler]

I find that to be true of cities here and in Europe, but when I was in Brisbane, AUS complete strangers kept striking up conversations. At first it was really awkward, especially when it happened in an elevator. You do NOT talk to people you don't know in an elevator in Oakland. It really blew me away how different the proprieties about speaking to people you don't know are in Australia.

I can relate to Chissler. I grew up in a small town north of Toronto where everyone was polite to each other and we knew mostly everyone anyways so it was Ok to talk to the person waiting in line with you or on the street or whatever. I live in a small city now and I admit it's scary for me and my kids. I was never exposed to homelessness, drunks , crazy people etc. This city has a prison and mental health facility which I swear at least 50% of the population visits on an out-patient basis conservatively speaking. I rarely speak to anyone when I go out and I never go out at night.I miss my hometown.

I am more apt to talk to strangers and kick up a conversation if I am looking good and feeling social. Otherwise it always seems when I rush out without makeup and dressed frumpy that others seem to want to talk to me first.

It really depends upon the situation. I grew up extremely introverted. I was an Army brat, and we moved around constantly. Every time I would make friends we would move, and I became increasingly introverted. I very rarely start a conversation with a stranger, but if I make eye contact with someone I'll almost always say "Hello", or "How Ya Doin'". If someone starts a conversation with me, I will always keep up my end of the conversation.

Do You Talk to Strangers?

Only if they offer me a lollipop and want me to get in their car.

Peace

Originally posted by MajorMalfunction
I find that to be true of cities here and in Europe, but when I was in Brisbane, AUS complete strangers kept striking up conversations. At first it was really awkward, especially when it happened in an elevator. You do NOT talk to people you don't know in an elevator in Oakland. It really blew me away how different the proprieties about speaking to people you don't know are in Australia.

Oh how I miss my home in Australia right now! This made me smile though and I am glad you have experienced true Aussie hospitality on your visit

I married and moved to Japan last year and I can honestly say I was expecting a bit of culture shock but not like this!
I understood it was going to be how it was when we lived out on town amongst Japanese nationals - let's face it, not alot like Americans (well not in the military-based areas) and they just seem to figure me to be one - not that I mind but I can't say I've ever worn my 'Australia" tshirts more than I have in the last year - or I'm wrong and these strangers have an issue with me for some unknown reason. But anyway, we moved onto the Navy base a few months ago and it's really not that much different here sadly.

I understand people are busy but damn, no smiles let alone a hello when I look to people for them, they just go about their business and/or chat to who they already know and are with. Except of course the young single sailors but that's really not the kind of attention I want now.

I am an extremely down to earth person, very friendly and am finding it so very hard over here, I was so eager to make new friends but the few people I did have the opportunity to talk to more than a "hi" haven't kept in touch, as nice as I was to them.
So as excited I am to be here I'm also quite sad - I love having friends around me and have none right now, not here anyway *sigh*

Frankly, as the days go by and the more I think about how rude some people have been the less I care and even want to befriend anybody here. I just hope it isn't contagious and I don't become that cold






[edit on 25-4-2007 by ImJaded]

Of course. Everyone must talk to strangers at least at one time or another, otherwise we would not have any friends or acquaintences.

I don't just talk to anybody off the street, though.

I rarely engage people in conversation, but for some reason a lot of people want to talk to me and tell me the most intimate details of their lives even though they don't know me.

Usually I just listen and give an occasional nod or "uh huh" but never give any unsolicited advice.

I find it difficult to talk to anyone I don't know, especially women. I think either I am too shy, or I lack communication skills that most people have. Other than saying "hello" and "how are you doing?" I can't seem to really keep up a conversation. This makes people think that either I am a complete snob, or that I am not friendly. I am probably one of the nicest people you could meet though. I think it could be from practically raising myself. Even with my current friends, I took forever to be able to carry on a conversation with. I have been trying to get past this shyness and for some reason I just can't. Perhaps it's just low self-confidence.

Some of the older Australians are a friendly bunch, they will strike a friendly conversation with almost any stranger. I got a shock when it happened to me, later on I found out that it is not unusal for this to happen.

Australians seem to have a friendly culture but like everything else, it cannot be generalised as I have encounter many unfriendly ones as well.

I generally do not speak to strangers if there isn't a need, (paranoid personality) but I will be friendly towards most strangers until they give me a reason not to be. (rude, hostile)

Strangers who are trying to preach a religion to me, I avoid, as with most salespersons, drunks, teenage/adult groups and touts.

My wife says I am too friendly.
I talk to clerks, and people standing in lines, passers-by, etc.
I don't always get a good reaction.
Doesn't matter to me..I understand that I have an extremely dry sense of humor, and I enjoy people's reactions..Good or bad.

It's really odd, because as a child I was EXTREMELY introverted.
Sometime around 13-14 years old, I told myself to snap out of it. And I did.
I said to myself..."look at those morons, they aren't afraid to talk to other people, even though they would lose to a turnip on Jeopardy."

So then, I talked.