Autism - It's Hit My Home., page 5
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ATS Members have flagged this thread 15 times


reply posted on 14-5-2007 @ 07:53 PM by intrepid
lombozo, you've been blessed and cursed at the same time. My youngest, a daughter(11 yo), was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome(autism). She's not "non-verbal", in fact she won't shut up. There are developmental challenges for her but she's the sweetest person I've ever met. That's the up side. She is also VERY emotional. Read that as needy. I can't go outside for a smoke that she isn't there. It can be overwhelming for a person. I'll share something here that I normally wouldn't but it's important for YOU.

From another forum:


My youngest child Kathy is an Asperger's child. It's a form of autism. You wouldn't know it to look at her(all autism isn't like Dustin Hoffman in Rain Man):



.. she's the sweetest person I've ever encountered. VERY emotional. Underdeveloped for her 11 years. You'ld have to spend time with her to notice the difference between her and another child her age.

She had this Russian hamster(nice pet) for about 2 years, it died yesterday. She was devastated. Today she was fine. I'm like , did she put it behind her already? Nope, I looked into the hamsters cage tonight and found a handful of "Forget me Nots" in there. It was Kleenex time.


And(a response to a query):


She IS beautiful. There is NO animosity in her at all. Even when dealing with her siblings(2 older kids). I hope she never learns animosity. These kids aren't only different, they're damn special. I'd wager Buddha was autistic. They have such a wonderful outlook on life.



Like I said, a blessing that you've been touched by a beautiful soul, a curse in a way that the effort can be overwhelming. It was to me until this week until I had a defining moment that put everything in perspective.

My wife is a member of an autism support group, if you want the addy I'll get it for you. As always, my u2u box is open, feel free to send me a message. Sometimes all you need is an ear that understands where you're coming from.


reply posted on 15-5-2007 @ 08:09 AM by lombozo
Originally posted by intrepid
lombozo, you've been blessed and cursed at the same time. My youngest, a daughter(11 yo), was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome(autism). She's not "non-verbal", in fact she won't shut up. There are developmental challenges for her but she's the sweetest person I've ever met. That's the up side. She is also VERY emotional. Read that as needy. I can't go outside for a smoke that she isn't there. It can be overwhelming for a person. I'll share something here that I normally wouldn't but it's important for YOU.


Wow. We share the same type of things with our children. My son also knows no animosity, and he is the gentlest soul. It at times is quite overwhelming dealing with him, but mind you, I thank heaven every day that I have him. I truly feel as though I was touched by god for the gift of my son. Being a cancer survivor (8 years clean), I was told that I would never be able to father a child. 4 years later, god smiled at me and my son was born into this world. (My wife is SO lucky that he looks like me!)
He at times will go from being outraged to the most loving soul in 1 minutes time, often times with no recognizable stimulus. My wife is a master at diverting his tantrums. I'm still trying to get that down. Sometimes I'll be sitting, and he'll come into the room and jump on me, wrap his arms around me, and tell me he loves me soooo much.

SoT - you're right, his face is angelic. It is different. I can't put a finger on it, but it is different. (Of course all parent think that of their own children.)
Nice links - thanks again.


reply posted on 3-3-2008 @ 08:06 PM by Michelle129
Hi Lombozo,

I know I've jumped on this thread way late, but just happened to find it doing a search for autism.

How is your little guy doing? I saw your last post (I believe) he was graduating from kindergarten...is he in grade one now? How is school going for him?

I'm not trying to pry, just trying to find some answers for my own son. He's been tested and assessed for everything under the sun and we still have no answers. I still believe it's autism but the closest we've come to that diagnosis is an official "doesn't meet enough criteria to be diagnosed within the autism spectrum, but does exhibit several autistic tendencies"

Very frustrating to say the least. Not necessarily that we want a label for him, just the proper tools to deal with him; and to help the school deal with him. He's an angel at home and a holy terror at school. Not the disrespectful, bratty, spoiled, aggressive terror. But I guess what it boils down to is his fight or flight reflex gets used quite often. He will run away and hide if given the chance, but if cornered he's like an animal and will, and has done some damage to his Educational Assistant, principal and teacher. He's never hurt another student intentionally but rather, kicked his shoe off during a flight episode and it hit a child in the back...that sort of thing.

His sensory issues are out of this world. I must add that he's hearing impaired. Profound loss in his left ear and moderate to severe loss in the right that he wears a hearing aid for. His sensory issues aren't to do with sound but rather touch. Since birth he already had his "personal space" all mapped out. Hated being held, touched, snuggled. All his baby pictures are of him sitting in his bouncy chair, or swing, or laying on our laps with a pillow between him and us (seemed to hate the touch of bare skin the most) Sad really when our other 2 kids' baby pictures are all snuggles and hugs and sleeping on our chest or tummy...makes me very sad to look through those pictures now

His hands are affected by what the doctor's call mirror movements. They keep telling us it will go away but he's nearly 8 now...What one hand does the other is doing totally unconciously. He had to go through 3 yrs of physical and occupational therapy just to sit, roll, crawl and eventually walk at 2 yrs of age. The hand movements took the most time. Things we take for granted like eating a bowl of cereal or soup. Both hands would be making the spoon scooping movement and neither was holding the bowl...very messy! Coloring, scissors, video games etc..anything requiring 2 hands took a long time for him to master. The funny thing is that the doc's all focus on his hands, but if you take his socks off you notice when he moves his hands his toes are also wiggling AND his tongue/lips...he's one big mess lol.

We think there may also be some OCD involved...washing hands, brushing teeth, lining up shoes and toys. Very perfectionistic (is that a word?) about school work...ripping up papers in extreme rage if he makes one mistake and wanting to start over. Won't sit at his desk in the morning until he paper towels "the germs" off the top etc

Anyhow, we love him to death and he's so cute he actually made it into one of the school's advertising pamphlets for deaf children! At home we have no problems with him as he's totally relaxed(other than a few extreme emotional mood swings here and there), but the minute he steps into the school he becomes totally neurotic and on edge. Unfortunately his panic usually manifests into anger and violence but that's just not him...you know. The school thankfully has been very understanding and is very accomodating. But he seems so sad and out of place and unhappy there. I would homeschool but I feel that would do him such a great injustice. He's extremely intelligent, doing work far above his grade level. There has been talk of moving him up to keep him challenged and not bored, but emotionally and socially he should actually probably be back in kindergarten rather than grade 2....

Anyhow, sorry this turned into a ramble, I always seem to talk to much when it comes to him lol. I'm wondering if anyone else in this thread that has children with aspergers or any other austism spectrum disorders has experienced this aggressive and violent behaviour and how have you dealt with that?

We as a family are currently involved in a community program...almost like an anger management class for children but I'm finding it's not applicable to us. The kids in the class are the bullying type of kids that are continuously aggressive and violent, stealing, cheating lying which is not our case. We attend as a family including his other two siblings so we can all help but it's starting to feel like a waste of time

Michelle



reply posted on 4-3-2008 @ 07:38 AM by lombozo
reply to post by Michelle129



Hi Michelle129.
Thank you for sharing! My son who is 5 is doing quite well. I am blessed enough to not have some of the issues you deal with. I knew he was different from before he was one. He did the 'hand flapping' from very early on, which apparently is a red flag. His toys needed to be in perfect symmetry. Routines needed to be absolute, no deviations whatsoever. He would just simply 'turn off'. There is no other way to say it. He would be playing, then suddenly would just go into a funk. Didn't hear, or see our advances to interact with him.
I had every test known for him. He in now enrolled in a school just for autistic children. Very hard to get accepted into it, but let me tell you. This school does it right. He repeated kindergarten, and the difference in him is astounding.
He is my entire universe. I've never loved anything as much as I love him. He amazes me every day. EVERY day.
I'm no expert, and I don't claim to be. However if you ever want to talk, you know where to find me. U2U's are a very cool thing!
Stay strong.
lombozo


reply posted on 6-9-2008 @ 07:58 AM by JonjoeMcHackey
reply to post by lombozo



Sounds like your son has the exact same condition I do so I can probably give you a bit of information on it. I'm 22 and only got diagnosed a couple of months ago though. Everyone thought I was some sort of genius child too because I could speak when I was about 2 and could do all sorts of complicated math problems when I was 6 and I think people got pissed off with me because they could see I wasn't stupid but I acted like a complete retard in all social situations. Most people take that as a sign of disrespect or something because they can't understand why I don't respond to verbal cues and all that kinda stuff.

Thats basically the only handicap I have. Not being able to read people at all and taking things at their face value. People with aspergers/high functioning autism have trouble understand the implied meaning of statements and tend to take them literally. I talk fairly monotously kinda like a robot so that may give people the impression that I'm stupid but when they see I'm smart then they shift their opinion to thinking I have some mental issues or something.

My advice would be not to give your son # for acting funny in social and formal situations as he's growing up. My mom gave me massive amounts of # because I eat like a caveman and she'd be embarrassed bringing me to restaurants. She thought I was trying to be rebellious or something but that wasn't the case at all. I ate the way that was most natural to me. I also pay no attention to getting food on my clothes and couldn't really care less about wearing dirty clothes with stains on them and some people find that weird. I also walk funny and carry myself differently to everyone else and people who don't know me think I'm some sorta maniac.

Autistic peoples brains seem to be wired differently so when they act naturally their natural is different to the average persons natural so they might come across as maniacs or idiots or immature or crazy or whatever.

BTW Its hard to say whether you should tell your son from the start that he has high functioning autism. The only grief this ever caused me was not understanding why I was so different. My whole life I put it down to being dropped on my head too many times as a baby. When I got diagnosed it was a bit of a relief because its not entirely my fault that I act the way I do. It was just causing me alot of grief because I wouldn't acknowledge the fact that I acted weird and as far as I was concerned I was just like everyone else but everyone around me kept telling me I acted crazy all the time and were wondering what was wrong with me.

[edit on 6-9-2008 by JonjoeMcHackey]


reply posted on 6-9-2008 @ 08:18 AM by Psychopump
Hi lombozo,

I have only read your OP, so please excuse me if similar things have been said already.

I was born in 1977, and in 1980 I was "diagnosed" with autism. My mother refused this verdict and allowed me to grow up without the label, stigma and burden of autism.

Later, around my early teens, I was diagnosed with ADHD (attention defecit hyperactivity disorder), which ahain, my mother paid no heed to; while the school authority wanted to put me in a "special school".

In my mid-teens I joined MENSA with an IQ above 150.

In my late teens I was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder (AKA Manic depression), but I had learned from my mother and refused the meds.

Now, in my early 30´s, I have no issues at all. I am seen as very intelligent by my peers and other contacts. I make friends easily. I speak 5 languages fluently, and consume books like they are cookies.

It is my belief that children who are more intelligent than their peers are often stamped with a "disease" to separate them from the rest. It is a proven fact that children who stand head and shoulders above the rest can be disruptive in school, can get bored easily, need constant stimulation and can even undermine the authority of teachers etc.

THIS IS A GOOD THING!
(but it is also why they want to drug and separate these children from the mainstream)

In this ever more corrupt world, the powers that be do not want very intelligent citizens. Very intelligent citizens ask too many questions instead of following blindly.

You have a gifted child and should protect him from those that see him as a threat.

Be strong.
Be resolute.

Good luck to you!
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