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I find it easy to forgive but hard to forget

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posted on Apr, 3 2007 @ 09:56 AM
If the one you love cheated you, and you have forgiven. The the next step is to forget. Now, that, I find so hard. I keep remembering every minute of betrayal. The pain, it's like a monster that consumes my mind & my body. It's alwasy there, teasing. It can drive someone crazy. It's torture.

I need kind advice to forget painful memories so that I can go with my life. Free of guilt, regret and keep thinking what could I have done to prevent it from happening.


posted on Apr, 3 2007 @ 03:34 PM
Friend, there's probably nothing that you could have done to keep it from happening. If someone is wanting to cheat, they're going to find a way to do it, no matter what. If you try to always "be there" then you run the risk of smothering them and they'll get tired of that too...

I don't know what encouraging words I can offer other than what I live by...

When I first met my wife, I was a little worried about cheating. We'd both come out of long relationships and wanted to be together, but at the same time wanted a little freedom.

Up until meeting her I had always been a very jealous person, since I was a teenager, most of my girlfriends cheated on me and I think that my first wife thought about it. Now you may ask, well why did that happen, was it my fault? I don't think so. I'm a very nice guy, I treat women very well. Some times too well, but thats another discussion.

It was very hard for me to trust Jen when I first met her, 9 years ago. She was a very independent person. I had to learn to love and trust her at the same time.

I did this by telling myself, I'm going to put myself out there and love her and trust her, if she does something then it's not my fault. I did the right things, treated her right and gave her my love, if she messed up then it's on her and I must choose to get over it or move on.

Well we're still together, I trust her completely to this day as she does me. I still feel the same way, if she cheated, yes it would hurt, but it wouldn't be my fault, I would have to move on.

You'll probably never be able to forget what happened, I know that I wouldn't. You just have to learn to accept if as a fact and maybe a lesson in life and go forward.

I don't know if that helps, just keep your head up and try to move forward.

Good Luck.

[edit on 3-4-2007 by elevatedone]

posted on Apr, 6 2007 @ 11:22 PM
Ya, ia lso many times forgive. Actually, i almost always forget. But i often hold a grudge about a certain thing. SOmething that waz hurtful is very hard to forgit even if u are talking to that person like every thing is fine.


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