posted on Mar, 31 2007 @ 01:14 AM
Thanks ben, you are a good friend, maybe we can exchange emails, so that during the times that I get to visit home from the army I will be able to
send you an email and you can post it on ATS. In US, soldiers are allowed to use computers (I have a friend who just got back from Afghanistan, he
kept in touch with me via myspace, he is Afghani and was a soldier/translator in Afghanistan), but I don't think that is so in Russia, at least last
time I checked they only used postal mail, but who knows? Maybe they could be using computers by now, who knows.
The reason I'm going to Russian army is simple, Russia is my country, I love it very much and will never love any country more. I love all other
countries alot, every single country and all their peoples of all races and religions and cultures, but Russia is my country and I love it and want to
serve it. Many people have tried to unconvince me otherwise, told me not to go, but they were unsuccessful, some told me stories of the treatment,
some told me other stories, but I am ready for what is to come, after all anything can happen anywhere, life is unpredictable. I was talking to my
friend who is in his late 30s he said he payed the government not to put his brother in the military, then he told me about his experiences, he had to
kill, it was some sort of combat against some sort of extremists betwean the Afghani and Chechen wars. He said he got grenade fragments close to his
heart and all he has left from it is memories, waking up in cold sweat at night remembering it, he told me over and over not to go, but everything he
told me that day I had thought about and knew, and I accept it, I already do wake up in cold sweat from stuff that's happened in my life. I do not
like to kill, but I like to punish wrong-doers. If it comes down to it I am ready to kill those who threaten Russia. I talked to some Muslim friends
once and they told me, who is right in a war? No one. Both committ crimes, the soldiers are just pawns, I said ok, but once I'm in warfare, I'm not
actually killing a man who is following orders, I am actually killing someone who is at that moment threatening the life of me and my comrades. And
why am I here in the first place? To protect and serve my country Russia, it is a shame so many leave there and hate it, Russia needs people like me,
and my goal is to not go out there and kill and get killed, but to try to work for a better future for Russia. I have never until now started talking
about my real point in life.. it is to make a better Russia, and a better world. One person will not change the world, but can spark the change. I
will do my best, I will do what is in my ability and beyond. I am hoping to get through the military and go as high a rank as possible, get as much
respect and support. Like my friend told me, the more people you know, the easier life is. If you know people in high positions, you are better off
then a person who doesn't know this kinds of people. Then, as I work my art job I will see if it is possible to get a high government job, and the
higher position I have the more I will be able to help. But I am not firmly holding on to this, because I know that betwean now and then something can
get in my way, stop me from achieving that objective, so I live today, curious about tomorrow. And I am always expecting the worse, my personall motto
is better expect the worse and get hit by something not so bad, then expect the best, and get hit by the worst.
And thanks to all who have got my back and support me, it is impossible for a sane human to live without support and help from peers. Thank you.