i've thought a lot about this topic. and i have no doubt that some people can be together for there entire lives. though do we really need this institution attached to it. cannot two very close people simply live together, merely acknowledging their love on a day-to-day basis, for howsoever long it is meant to last? is it something for show, something we do to be accepted into society? what's in a ring, besides the symbolism?

if you ask me, no wedding band is stronger than the heart.

-peace-

There are women I wish I had married and women I wish I hadn't

I'm just glad the ones I wish I had married, aren't now also one's I wish I hadn't.

Did that makes sense? It's an episode of Friends I think.

Helen? The old tradition of a wife sending her servants to bed with her husband to keep having children after the wife passes the age of child bearing always struck me as odd given the commandment against adultery.

I know God scolded Sara and Abraham for not having faith in his promise of a child, but never denounced the practice per se. (Nor having slaves for that matter).

Any thoughts?

I really don't think there is a NEED for it, but I think it's more of a want. I believe its like a personal security for people that really do love each other. Of course, it would work if they just lived together. It doesn't seem like the same though, boyfriends and girlfriends can live together and it's still not the same, marriage just seems final.

I predict that this will soon revert to an all out war on homosexual marriages.

I think that marriage is a union of two souls,

MAN/WOMAN,
WOMAN/WOMAN/
MAN/MAN

I personaly cant wait to get married,
Though I have to finish school first, Get a financialy secure job, with enough income to support my wife and kids, hit puberty, then I should be all right

Deep

Originally posted by joshter
marriage just seems final.

It isn't.

I got married 2 weeks ago.
Why? Not for security or for symbolism. My marriage was making the statement to my wife telling her that I will stay with her until my time on this planet is up.
If there were another way to express this to her, I would have taken it. But to me, marriage is a bond. You enter binding contracts in day to day life over all sorts of issues all of the time.
Marriage is the ultimate contract.
With that contract comes many things hidden away in the small print that mean different things to different people!!!

Originally posted by Leveller
I got married 2 weeks ago.
Why? Not for security or for symbolism. My marriage was making the statement to my wife telling her that I will stay with her until my time on this planet is up.
If there were another way to express this to her, I would have taken it. But to me, marriage is a bond. You enter binding contracts in day to day life over all sorts of issues all of the time.
Marriage is the ultimate contract.
With that contract comes many things hidden away in the small print that mean different things to different people!!!

Congratulations are in order!

helen....

Marriage Blah! I am 28 and have never been married. I honestly see no reason for it. The woman I am with now wants to get married. When I ask her why, all she can say is "what I am not good enough to marry?" Marriage is supposed to be a holy or religous ceremony. I am not religous and neither is she, so why make a promise to a god that I am not sure if I believe in? I understand it is also making a promise to her also, but when I tell her I want to be with her, isnt that enough? The only thing marriage is good for is health insurance if one of the 2 isnt working. Also forever is a long time, what if I come home one day and she is banging the mail man or something, am I supposed to say "well I promised forever, nothing I can do, let him have it honey". This woman, as I know right now, would never cheat on me, but ther is always that "what if".

I would just like to remind everybody that marriage has been around a lot longer than the bible. Man and woman have pledged loyalty to each other for millenium. Cultures that have never even heard of the bible get married in their own cerememonies having nothing to do with the bible.

I just wanted to state that before people start spewing on about the "holy" sanctity of marriage and implying that it is the Christians who should decide the rules of marriage.

Koolaid has a point.
Dusty,
The "WOMAN", what shes just a WOMAN to you?
lol,
Marriage is not a union to god, its a union to eachother.
Deep

Sorry if I confused religon and marriage, but werent adam and eve married? Werent they the begining of life, according to the bible?
No she is not "just" a woman but for this discussion, no need for anthing more.


Ignorance is bliss.

If people need to get married to prove their love to one another then their relationship is obviously not good enough. Marriage isn't a completely neccesary thing. Most marriages now end in divorce so why do it ? Sorry i was a synical, single parented child. [i/]

does who need it ? if two persons marry its normally because they like it..so who needs it then ? Its just a contract between two people, a very loose contract..if they need it then they need it but who is we in this...pz, joz

Sorry if I confused religon and marriage, but werent adam and eve married? Werent they the begining of life, according to the bible?

Well exactly, its according to the bible.

And of course, this can be argued weather or not that they were the begining of life, which science has proven wrong, in terms of adam and eve.

I dont think they were married, were they?

I just thought, God realized that Adam must be real bored and needed to get laid here and their so threw him a girl down in the garden of eden to get busy with, but the two timing hoe cashed out with some snake and his apples.

Deep

it's good to see that everyone is contributing to this topic. i believe it's something that we all eventually strive for. not necessarily the idea of marriage, but the union of two souls. never follow doubt.

[Edited on 18-12-2003 by deafence#]

Originally posted by Leveller
I got married 2 weeks ago.
Why? Not for security or for symbolism. My marriage was making the statement to my wife telling her that I will stay with her until my time on this planet is up.

Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!

Did anyone round here have any idea?

Good sentiments there man, especially all those things you refer to as the fine print in your unique "contract". Sounds like you took all the time you needed to sort them out before you gave it your ultimate signature!

Warm fraternal greetings and hearty good wishes to you and your wife, Leveller.

Originally posted by Dusty
Marriage Blah! I am 28 and have never been married. I honestly see no reason for it. The woman I am with now wants to get married. When I ask her why, all she can say is "what I am not good enough to marry?" Marriage is supposed to be a holy or religous ceremony. I am not religous and neither is she, so why make a promise to a god that I am not sure if I believe in? I understand it is also making a promise to her also, but when I tell her I want to be with her, isnt that enough? The only thing marriage is good for is health insurance if one of the 2 isnt working. Also forever is a long time, what if I come home one day and she is banging the mail man or something, am I supposed to say "well I promised forever, nothing I can do, let him have it honey". This woman, as I know right now, would never cheat on me, but ther is always that "what if".

Well, actually, I think you're kind of having some tunnel vision here - maybe on purpose...LOL.

A RELIGIOUS marriage ceremony is, in fact, intended to make a public commitment before a Higher Power. But as some one so correctly stated here, marriage is found in isolated civilizations. So removing the "religious" ceremonies from this act of marrying, you get down to two levels of commitment:

1. A commitment to monagomy - which seems to be a very strong need in most women. We just don't like to share our joysticks. <== This not sharing has developed in many many cultures - for health reasons! I'll be damned!

2. A commitment to support each other - you're saying you've picked your buddy on the big life buddy-system and you're going to watch their six, and they're going to watch your six. This applies to emotional support, to financial support - you've entered into a partnership that helps both of you weather the big logistical issues of life.

Now, when you look at the above reasons you start to see why there could be a question of "am I not good enough to marry". I think diminishing the importance of this question for the sake of being able to get out of answering it is less than honorable.

I don't believe marriage is necessary, but I do believe the commitment to the other person is an honorable thing to do....it is a commitment to be there. And, if you haven't found some one that makes you understand that, you're not ready!

P.S. In order to have a true and well-rounded discussion on marriage, we have to also include divorce. If you look at the historical record, the "setting aside" of a marriage has NEVER been a big thing...almost down to the most minute civilization. It has basically been about as hard to do as standing up in the mess hall and saying...I'm done. There was no such thing as "divorce", but usually considered a setting aside of the contract. By verbal or written proclamation, the marriage was over (the stinky part is that this power to set aside was usually only available to the man, not the woman.)

There was no law in the Catholic church against divorce until the great power struggle between them and the King of England - who was wanting a divorce REAL bad. At that point the Vatican wrote themselves up an anti-divorce edict which they hoped to use in this power struggle against the King of England...When they all of sudden decided he couldn't change wives...he threw them a great big flaming "up yours" and hence the origins of the Church of England. Guess he taught them a lesson, huh?