Newz Forum: FOOTBALL: Dean's List: Amusing Musings for October 7, 2004

In Miami, AJ Feeley is the back-up quarterback for the Dolphins. And in Atlanta, "Just" Jay Feely is the kicker for the Falcons. Not since the heyday of "Sesame Street" has the letter A has so much significance...

In the NFL, does an upheld challenge constitute an "official" flip-flop?

His name is Ray Lewis. He plays for the Baltimore Ravens. And he's the best linebacker in the National Football League. Ravin' Ray is all about the action. Ravin' Ray is all about the power. Quite simply, Ravin' Ray is all about star power. So forget about reality shows - Ray Lewis is already "The Next Action Star." When his Hall of Fame career comes to a close, Ray should take his rightful place among Hollywood's A-List and do what the Rock never could: pick up where Arnold left off...

Speaking of which, President Bush should anoint the Ravin' Raven to hunt down Osama. Why not? Lewis has no problem "smoking out" the ever-elusive, world-class skilled players of the NFL, so Bin Laden would be easy pickings...

If Parity is a plague afflicting the National Football League, then Bill Belichick and the New England Patriots have the antidote. With an NFL record-tying eighteenth straight victory this past weekend in Buffalo, the 3-0 Patriots took another giant leap in their quest for history. As the league looks more like a parody of Parity with each passing week, New England's steadfast refusal to take any opponent lightly keeps the joke from being on them...

I can't remember the last time a running back averaged more yards per touch on the ground than through the air. And I know it's early, but the Jets' Curtis Martin is doing just that, averaging 4.8 ypc - as in yards per catch, not carry - with thirteen receptions for 63 yards and a whopping 5.0 yards per carry with 85 rushes for 425 yards...

Just how far have the San Francisco 49ers fallen? With salary cap issues that equate to nothing short of an aberration, the Team of the 80's & 90's is taking an indefinite leave of absence from the competitive realm of the National Football League. Comcast's description of their recent "Sunday Night Football" game against St. Louis summed it up best: "Quarterback Marc Bulger leads the Rams against wide receiver Brandon Lloyd and the 49ers." Yeah, I'm not quite sure who Brandon Lloyd is either...

Forget about a touchdown. The "whole" nine yards won't even get you a first down...

On the heels of his widely publicized "60 Minutes" interview with Mike Wallace, it bears repeating that Cowboys coach Bill Parcells is the undisputed Master of the Media. Not because he's a bad-ass, but because he's funny bad-ass. How else could one man paradoxically command boundless quantities of fear and admiration? Following Dallas' recent Monday Night victory against the Redskins, the legendary linguist was asked if he was "surprised" to see arch-rival Joe Gibbs across the sidelines "after all these years." What a set-up. "I was getting ready for it," Parcells quipped. "So it's not like I didn't anticipate him being there."

Bill has the pats on a record pace and its funny how this weekend they play the dolphins who currently hold teh streak for 18 straight wins, and now if the pats win they will have the record in their hands.

I think nobody is going to argue that ray lewis is the best linebacker in the nfl maybe even the dest defensive player, how many tackles does he make per game? i think i always hear that he makes 15 plus tackles per game, that is something else, and that is one play maker that can turn a game around.