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light bulb jokes

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posted on Nov, 17 2003 @ 09:25 PM
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Q. How many Microsoft software engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?










A. None. They'll just declare "Darkness(tm)" the new standard.



[Edited on 17-11-2003 by William]



posted on Nov, 17 2003 @ 09:33 PM
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Q. How many ATS members does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A. 17.

1 Site Administrator to screw it in.
1 to complain about it not being screwed in soon enough.
1 to complain about it not being bright enough.
1 to complain about it being too bright.
3 to go into the next room and try to screw one in, but ending up in the dark.
2 to go outside and screw each other.
1 Moderator to break it up.
1 to complain about bad math.





posted on Nov, 17 2003 @ 10:00 PM
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Q: how many union electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?


A" 11. you got a problem with that???



posted on Nov, 17 2003 @ 10:28 PM
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Originally posted by MaskedAvatar
Q. How many ATS members does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A. 17.

1 Site Administrator to screw it in.
1 to complain about it not being screwed in soon enough.
1 to complain about it not being bright enough.
1 to complain about it being too bright.
3 to go into the next room and try to screw one in, but ending up in the dark.
2 to go outside and screw each other.
1 Moderator to break it up.
1 to complain about bad math.




lol i almost pointed out the bad math



posted on Nov, 17 2003 @ 11:51 PM
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Q:How Liverpool fans does it take to screw in a light bulb?


A:Just the one!



posted on Nov, 18 2003 @ 10:18 AM
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Q: how many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?

A: one, but it's gotta want to change.

Q: how many women does it take to change a light bulb?

A: one to hold it and wait till the world revolves around her.


and my fav, taken from boondock saints,

Q: how many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: "well it takes two doesn't it? one to change the light bulb, and a wee lil lesbian to suck my #ing cock!"



posted on Nov, 18 2003 @ 10:35 AM
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Originally posted by MaskedAvatar
Q. How many ATS members does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A. 17.

1 Site Administrator to screw it in.
1 to complain about it not being screwed in soon enough.
1 to complain about it not being bright enough.
1 to complain about it being too bright.
3 to go into the next room and try to screw one in, but ending up in the dark.
2 to go outside and screw each other.
1 Moderator to break it up.
1 to complain about bad math.




But that's only 11 people!



posted on Nov, 18 2003 @ 10:47 AM
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Originally posted by MaskedAvatar
Q. How many ATS members does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A. 17.

1 Site Administrator to screw it in.
1 to complain about it not being screwed in soon enough.
1 to complain about it not being bright enough.
1 to complain about it being too bright.
3 to go into the next room and try to screw one in, but ending up in the dark.
2 to go outside and screw each other.
1 Moderator to break it up.
1 to complain about bad math.




LoL MA



posted on Nov, 18 2003 @ 10:49 AM
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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I don't know it's never been done




[Edited on 18-11-2003 by Sapphire]



posted on Nov, 18 2003 @ 11:39 AM
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Originally posted by Sapphire
How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I don't know it's never been done



yeah it has,
blonds will screw anything



posted on Nov, 18 2003 @ 12:10 PM
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Q. How many frenchmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A. One, he holds the lightbulb and the rest of Europe revolves around him.



posted on Nov, 18 2003 @ 12:34 PM
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But that's only 11 people!


See this one...

1 to complain about bad math.



posted on Nov, 18 2003 @ 01:10 PM
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Well, there's 10 kinds of people.... Those who understand binary and those who don't.

Oops, not strictly lightbulb related, sorry.



posted on Nov, 18 2003 @ 02:18 PM
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Q How Many kids with A.D.D does it take to change the light bulb






A you wanna go ride bikes



posted on Nov, 18 2003 @ 03:28 PM
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Q: How many Windows users does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One. But they'll swear up and down that it was JUST as easy as it would be for a Mac user.



posted on Nov, 18 2003 @ 03:40 PM
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how many mac users does it take to change a lightbulb?

none of them know how to unfold a ladder themselves.



posted on Nov, 19 2003 @ 10:54 PM
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Originally posted by MaskedAvatar

1 to complain about bad math.



Yay! I got a mention!



posted on Nov, 19 2003 @ 11:01 PM
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How many ATS staff does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. They hold it up, along with 200 points and a graphical medal.


J/K

[Edited on 11-19-03 by Saucerat]



posted on Nov, 20 2003 @ 12:54 AM
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How many CIA agents does it take to change a light bulb???

Eight.

Two to watch each other while they change to light bulb.
Two to watch to first two to make sure they are not changing light bulbs for the Russians.
Two to deny CIA involvement in the changing of the light bulb.
Two to claim that either the FBI or NSA changed the light bulb.



posted on Nov, 20 2003 @ 01:33 AM
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Originally posted by Zzub
Q. How many frenchmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A. One, he holds the lightbulb and the rest of Europe revolves around him.


HAHAHAHAHA

Never heard that 1 b4!



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