This...is your brain on drugs. Any Questions?

Man calls 911 to report that someone stole his pot.
DOH!

Story here

The Pot thief had not been located, at the time of the story.

classic!

THis report reminds me of a book I have that is halarious. It's called the worlds stupidts criminals. They talk about police reports from all over the world that are funny or rediculus.

A bunch of theives broke into a brick industrial building a while back. They used dynamite to blast open the safe. THe blast worked. The problem. The theives never read the signage on the outside of the building that stated the companies proffesion. So they used explosives to blow the safe, which was holding all of the companies explosives, for they were a demolition company. The whole building came down in the middle of the night with the idiot theives inside.

A drunk blind guy was at the bar with his girlfriend and seeing eye dog somewhere in the south US. The blind guy and the girlfriend get into a fight and she storms out leaving him there and also leaves his car there too. He decides he is going to drive home. SO the cops pull over the guy cause he's sterring in the wrong lane, and weaving. THey find the blind guy driving and using his dog as a navigator. The dog would bark etc with the street lights changing (they're trained to do this) According to the cops the dog actually did a pretty good job. THe dogs name given to him by the drunk blind guy...no joke...Budweiser.

COps respond to a domestic desturbance in the middle of the night that is going on in a quite middle class suberb. When they show up they see a naked man wresteling and fighting with ....An Orengatan...in heat...trying to have it's way with him. No means no, but that doesn't work if the animal is a monkey!

A cop once told me the funniest thing he's ever seen was a guy on a PCP trying to mail himself, by attempting to stuff his body into a regular home mail box...while naked...in broad daylight. The guy wasn't violent just adament that he was going to mail himself.