86% of South Africans want Chuck Norris for President

I found this when I was looking at the news, I guess the South Africans are losing their marbles. Chuck Norris for President

I thought these were funny.

* "Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there."

* "They wanted to put Chuck Norris on Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn't tough enough for Chuck's beard."

* "Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink."

* "Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming that 'Law & Order' are the names of his left and right legs."

* "Chuck Norris sleeps with a night-light because the dark is afraid of him."

* "Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas."

* "There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live."

* "When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he doesn't push himself up. He pushes the Earth down."

* "When the boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris."

[edit on 11-12-2006 by thehumbleone]

Come on.

Eighty-six percent of respondents to a South African mens' magazine does not constitute a consensus of voters-at-large.

Norris is an admirable individual for his accomplishments, but the article cites no evidence that such a poll actually represents any political reality anywhere in the world, not even South Africa.

Well, i think South Africans are very wise people. I dont know what Chuck's politics are, but i do like his manners and looks.

I wish I could grow a beard as thick as Chuck Norris.

Originally posted by thehumbleone
I wish I could grow a beard as thick as Chuck Norris.

I do, too, actually.

I'm sure every country yearns for a president with a thick, handsome beard.

Originally posted by GradyPhilpott

Originally posted by thehumbleone
I wish I could grow a beard as thick as Chuck Norris.

I do, too, actually.

I'm sure every country yearns for a president with a thick, handsome beard.

For the love of...

With a face like this, he has to be the Antichrist.

Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter! Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves. Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.

Originally posted by thehumbleone
I wish I could grow a beard as thick as Chuck Norris.

In Communist Russia, think beard grows you.

Haha, I love those Chuck Norris jokes. But in all serious, if anyone could be my hero, besides Jesus, it would be Chuck Norris. He is an amazing person and a great contributer to society. And I also love all his films.

Check out "Breaker, Breaker" from 1976.

Originally posted by thexsword
Haha, I love those Chuck Norris jokes. But in all serious, if anyone could be my hero, besides Jesus, it would be Chuck Norris. He is an amazing person and a great contributer to society. And I also love all his films.

Check out "Breaker, Breaker" from 1976.

Chuck Norris and Jesus as your role models..

Interesting...

86% of South Africans wanting Chuck Norris to be their leader is no more shameful than 50% of Americans wanting George W. Bush to be their leader.

Chuck couldn't act his way out of a paper bag. Bruce Lee actually fractured Chucks neck when he was trying to be smart. (verifiable) Chucks "exercise" equipment that he hawks on TV is a piece of junk.

The South Africans can have him. We will even toss in G.W. Bush for free. ... And if they act now they can get a slightly used Rumsfeld for a Christmas stocking stuffer.

Chuck Norris once brought a dead chicken back to life by rubbing its dead body on his beard.

He then killed it by wringing its neck

Proving once and for all that what Chuck giveth, Chuck taketh away!

lmao thoses chuck norris jokes are so retarded they are funny

Chuck Norris and Jesus as your role models..

Interesting...

Yeah, that's correct.

Originally posted by Impreza
Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter! Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves. Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.

It' probably an old one but I have never heard the Victoria's secret joke.

Just a little info on the magazine in question here:

"ZOO Weekly/Weekliks brand features a variety of topical, newsy and entertaining content, packaged neatly together in a compact formula of girls, sport, cars, gigs, jokes and gizmos. ZOO is aimed at affluent, urban men with an average age of 22 and is edited by former FHM Managing Editor Margot Bertelsmann."

So you see, little boys all love gung-ho kung-fu fighters so we really shouldn't be surprised.

and:
"Launched mid-October ZOO Weekly/Weekliks has sold 30 544 copies of its launch issue, 37 563 copies in week two, followed by 35 197 and 31 618 copies in weeks three and four respectively."

Now, 86% of the above figures gives you a good idea of how small the section of the population really is that want an American B-grade movie actor for president!

The above quotes taken from www.bizcommunity.com...

Just because we're Africans doesn't mean we're stupid. So please don't send Chuck Norris or gforbid G W Bush our way please!

Chuck Norris was examined by scientists and after careful study of the structure of his eyelashes came up with the Bowflex powerrods.