The Perfect Toy!!!!!!!

So I'm sittin' here doin' some thinkin'...........
So I says to myself, Self, what would be the perfect toy?
Hmmmmm..........The perfect toy.......

A slingshot? Hmmmm, I like sling shots, you can shoot cats in the butt when they're meowing at night - they always look so surprised! And like you can shoot at tin cans and stuff. But if you run out of rocks, a slingshot is pretty boring - nope not perfect.

A sled? Man - sledding is fun! Like when you're going down a really cool hill and stuff, and everyone is lookin' at you, because you're going so fast. But if you hit some dirt, and the sled stops and you go flyin' and stuff - that's not so fun. Nope - not perfect.

An air hockey table? Shootin' that puck around is really cool. Makin' it go so fast that you can't even see that puck flyin' around. And like you can put your face on the table, and all that air shootin' up tickles your face. But if you're all alone, that air hockey table is pretty boring. Nope - not perfect.

C'mon brain, I need you to do some really good thinkin' here.
Hmmmm...... what would be the perfect toy....the perfect toy.......

Wait! I got it!

The perfect toy is a transporter!

Oh man, that is some good thinkin! Yep having a transporter would be so cool! A really fancy one, like that transporter on Star Trek!


Like you could go into the worst neighborhoods lookin' all scary and stuff. You could go and call the biggest, meanest gang a bunch of weiners, and act all tough and stuff in front of their girlfriends. Those girlfriends would think you're so cool!When that big mean gang pulls out their guns and stuff, you just beam away! I bet those gang members would be so surprised!

Or like when your loser brother in law is eating his dinner - you could call him on the phone. When he gets up to answer that phone, you could beam in - spit in his food - then beam out real quick! Oh man this is so cool!

Hold on! How is this for an idea? Oh brain I love you! Like if you're out at a bar with your friends, and it's gettin' really late, and you know your wife is gettin' all mad and stuff. You could use that transporter and beam yourself into your bedroom. Then you can call out "Honey when are you going to come up to bed?". I bet she'd be so surprised!

Oh man, that is some really good thinkin'! Man I really want a transporter!

I saw some show not long ago about future technology. A transporter might actually be in existence years and years from now.

The problem is putting all the little molecules and atoms of someone back together in exactly the same form as when they are "transported".