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Originally posted by JamesMcMahn
Ever wonder why mexicans are brown? Its because Chuck Norris uses them as toilet paper.
Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk, and prance around like a homo.
Chuck Norris turned down the Tom Hanks' role in Philadelphia because, he said, "It hits to close to homo... I mean home."
Chuck Norris is trying to bring back the "fanny pack."
Chuck Norris once ALMOST finished an entire double-mocha frappuccino latte at Starbucks, but stopped when he started to feel "woozy."
Chuck Norris loses bladder control while watching scenes from Death Wish III that feature the epitome of masculinity, Charles Bronson.
The line “Can you tell me how to get, how to get to Sesame Street” originated when Chuck Norris, nervous and eager to have sex with puppets, lost his way to the Sesame Street auditions.
Chuck Norris once hid his cornflakes in a safe because he heard a serial killer was on the loose.
Chuck Norris was once struck by a van, and miraculously revived at the hospital. His family sued the hospital.
Chuck Norris is so gay that when he goes to the donkey show, he get jealous of the woman.
Chuck Norris clutches the hell out of his Coach bag.
Originally posted by bodrul
Chuck Norris was once invited back to his high school to speak at a graduation. Upon his arrival, Screech, Slater, Kelly, Lisa, and Jesse said, "That's not Zack Morris, that's Chuck Norris!" Mr. Belding broke the bad news to the class that Zack would not be attending the graduation, then delivered a roundhouse kick to Chuck Norris and sent him to detention.