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God VS Chuck Norris

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posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 05:01 PM
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Originally posted by bodrul
chuck norris is out dated and should be forgotton


I hope you had fun, because Norris is going to bust down your door, down a bottle of petrol and then round-house kick you through a window.

All while he saves the world from a bunch of ninjas. With frying pans.




posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 05:22 PM
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Chuck Norris is so fast that he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 05:27 PM
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Chuck Norris is one of the D-boys.



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 05:29 PM
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Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 05:44 PM
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Chuck Norris Doesn't spleep... he waits..



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 06:08 PM
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Originally posted by Zanzibar
I hope you had fun, because Norris is going to bust down your door, down a bottle of petrol and then round-house kick you through a window.

All while he saves the world from a bunch of ninjas. With frying pans.


chuck norris is so old when he tries to smash down the door his legs smash and then spills on his petrol setting him self alight



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 06:10 PM
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Chuck Norris is the Lord of War.



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 06:15 PM
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On the seventh day God rested and Chuck Norris took over.



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 07:51 PM
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Chuck is good...hes REALLY good. Hell...here is even a flash cartoon to PROVE that he is from the heavens.



[edit on 22-11-2006 by The Collective]



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 09:36 PM
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The Devil went down to Georgia not because he was looking for a soul to steal.. Chuck Norris took over hell for two weeks and told the Devil to get the # out.


When Chuck Noris jumps in a pool he dosent get wet water gets Chuck Noris.

Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.


Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.


Chuck Norris doesnt eat. Rather he kicks ass until hes full
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Chuck Norris never gets laid, rather: laid gets Chuck.

Chuck Norris only masterbates to pictures of Chuck Norris



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 09:49 PM
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When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.


[edit on 22/11/2006 by Beelzebubba]



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 10:34 PM
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Why did God kill Jesus? Because he was trying to make someone as perfect as Chuck Norris and failed.

Reason it took God so long to make humans was because he was trying to make someone as perfect as Chuck Norris but gave up when he couldn't.

In Soviet Russia, Chuck Norris doesn't beat you up, you beat yourself up as not to get your 3rd class human blood on his knuckles!

The Lord said let the be light, Chuck Norris came and kicked the crap out of dark and so light came to be.

God did not defeat Lucifer, Chuck Norris beat Lucifer.



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 10:39 PM
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CHUCK NORRIS TOILET PAPER...



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 10:42 PM
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thats wallpaper material right there!! lol!!!



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 10:49 PM
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Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 11:07 PM
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There is no such thing as evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.



posted on Nov, 22 2006 @ 11:55 PM
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Originally posted by Musky
There is no such thing as evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.




AHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAH luaghing my #!ng ass off!!!!!



posted on Nov, 23 2006 @ 01:02 AM
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If Chuck Norris wants your opinion, he'll beat it into you.



posted on Nov, 23 2006 @ 01:11 AM
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Every morning after his coffee kicks in, Chuck Norris grabs the paper, heads to the bathroom, and takes a big Sylvester Stallone.



posted on Nov, 23 2006 @ 01:15 AM
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Chuck Norris wipes himself with Jean-Claude Van Damme.

[edit on 23-11-2006 by Musky]



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