posted on Oct, 12 2006 @ 11:06 AM
So I'm sittin' here doin' some thinkin'.......... So I says to myself, Self, what would be the perfect way to make a terrorist confess?
How to make a terrorist confess? Hmmmm, those terrorists are pretty tough and crafty...........
How to make them confess....how to make them confess?.......
Torture? That'll usually works, but like you have to put newspaper on the floor and stuff. And the screaming will hurt my ears I bet. Nope, not
Sleep deprivation? Nah, that can't be perfect. When I don't get much sleep I don't want to talk to anyone about anything. Nope not perfect.
Drugs? Hmmmm...... I tried some of those drugs, and I don't know what the heck I was sayin' and stuff. I was thinkin' I was a bird. Nope, don't
want those terrorists thinkin' that they're birds!
Hmmm.... So what would be the perfect way to make those terrorists confess?
C'mon brain, do some good thinkin' here..........
Wait! I got it! Oh brain this is some really great thinkin'!
The perfect way to make those terrorists confess is to have them go to a family function at my mother in laws house!
Yep, you make that terrorist sit in that house, and in 5 minutes my wife, her 2 sisters, and the mother in law will be yellin' at each other. Then
all 7 of the little kids will start cryin' and fightin' and stuff. Then my loser brother in law will bore the hell out of that terrorist with stupid
jokes, and other nonsense.
Oh man, this is such good thinkin'! Wait! There's more! Now we make that terrorist sit at the table and eat my mother in laws turkey. If he doesn't
break his teeth on that dried up turkey, then he's really tough. Then he has to try my sister in laws green beans and spinach dip. Then he has to go
and try that turkey stuffing that is so soggy, that you want to puke when it hits your tongue, all dripping with oil and juice and stuff.
Now everyone is yellin' at each other about how everything that everyone else made is so terrible. That terrorist will wish he chose to be a suicide
bomber instead I bet.
Then he has to drink that coffee that is so strong that it melts your spoon when you swirl around the cream and stuff.
Then that terrorist has to sit in the living room and watch the game while all the guys well- how shall we say - start "tooting".......I bet that
terrorist would be so surprised! Yep, all that tooting, and the kids all cryin' and fightin' over toys, and the women all yellin' at each other to
shut up. That terrorist will be confessing in no time.
Yep, that is the perfect way to make a terrorist confess!
Oh brain I love you!