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Originally posted by millerman
You're exactly right and I have tried this exact approach. I have spelled out for her the things she does that I hate and want her to stop doing - and I have spelled out the things that I love about her and exactly what I expect from her.
The problem is - she doesn't listen to me at all and always does the OPPOSITE of what I tell her! So we end up in this neverending battle for control....
How to deal with such a person? When we can't work things out and be Happy together, I can't cut her out of my life completely (due to too many common interests, connections with friends etc), and, obviously, I can't kill her! (JUST JOKING OF COURSE)
Originally posted by AngelaLadyS
The solution is indifference! Which is exacly the reason I started this thread. LOL
Not indifference as in 'I don't care about you', but indifference to that emotional bond/love thing.... another words, what you need to do is exactly what I had to do... begin caring for that person as a person, not as an intamiate relationship or lover, just as a person. You have to do this within yourself - it's a mindset. And when you are able to do this - it would be like your friend that you never had any 'feelings for' getting a new boyfriend... it wouldn't make you jealous or anything. It's just a person you know and get along with.