Listen up.

Started a thread a while ago here but it's bad form to tell you all to go to another site where it's all posted. So I'll bring it here.

Best thing to do right now is make a pool on how long I'll last.

My name is Mark for the denser of you that couldn't put that together. My screen name is also my street name. My black friends told me white boys can have and choose their own street name. There ya go. My real screen name is teacher. You'll see why.

I'll now take some time to give you a real bad first impression of me.

I'm here now. This Pyramid garbage is over. I'll be posting how it could have been built. My way is head and shoulders above all the other theories. I challenge you to find fault in any part. You can't, but try. You're better off trying to understand it. This is now out in the world. I've been sending emails every where with a short message as polite as this one and the site where the theory is. I've had no mistakes found in my method yet. Most seem to dwelll on my charming disposistion and humble character. Which I guess is what you do to the man that is ending you carreer of using the interest in Pyramids to make a buck making crap up about something they don't have a clue about while I embarass and show them their place in life. The days of these charlatens is over. There is not one theory or explanaion that I have come acrcoss that I haven't been able to shoot mulitiple holes in in seconds.

Here's why.

As many know the aveage wieght of a block is 2.5 tons and about 3' cubed. Most people tying to explain how it was built were taught all they know by someone who has to call me to get their cat out fom behind the stove.

Fo ten years I moved safes. The owner was cheap. No forklift. Often moving safes with only levers and rollers. There is a way to do this. Safety is the main concern. Not once have I seen a constuction explainer have even the rudimentery basics down. Substitute 2.3 million blocks with safes. Now forget about safes. I'll be moving blocks. Still with me? Many will hate me. I'll chew your silly theories up wih hands on hard learned expeience. It's for you own good. Want to go through life being horribly wrong and telling everyone you're right or know the truth?

This can go several ways. Don't let it get ugly. I'm smarter than you and no one can talk s**t better than me.

Some suggestions.

All the methods I'll explain for moving blocks I have made a living at doing. Don't try to question them.,me. I can tilt a ton safe, raising one side in the air easily with a 3 foot crow bar. I'm not gonna give you leverage formulas or link you to a site where it says listen to me.t Don' ask me to prove nothing. I'm right. Prove me wrong. I'm busy and don't want to hold your hand while I explain rollers are round and roll. If you do anyway I'll be forrced to abuse you, and not knowing this site get banned and then you will spend the rest of you life tying ballons to blocks trying to move them.

Read all I post before questions or attempted rebuke. This will be a while. I can also explain Stonehenge, Mayan pyramids, obilisks, and on. All the methods apply, just clever varied aplications. In time this will lead to my submitting this to the good Dr. Hawwas and then the Nobel prize. But I want to spread some joy fist. I abore liars, theives, and immorality. I'm cleaning house on this matter. If you find a mistake and prove it I will admit it. If. Now forget about that.

Bad spelling does not keep a pyramid from being built. Is there spell check here? Pointing out my English mistakes does not shame me and shows you have nothing of value to add, you can't rebuke me, and points out your small petulant character. And may bring my wrath which is terrible to behold. Ask informed thought out questions. If I haven't covered it ask, it will be coming because I have this from quarry to top.

I'm here now. Be thankful in your good fortune and pay attention.

[QUOTE=teacher]For ten years part of my job was moving safes. At times with only rollers, levers, blocks of wood, and shims, I and my coworker would move up to 6 ton safes around, up and down stairs, ramps, over curbs and such. The Egyptians who built the Pyramid had the exact same tools available to them. When it dawns on you the simplicity of my theory, which I call twide, (the way I would do it), you will ask how I was the first to think of such an obvious method. I use this analogy. You know how Lincoln Logs are notched at the ends so the middles are close fitting? Who do you think was the first to come up with that? A leather elbow patched tweed jacket wearing tenured Oxford professor or a guy in the woods with an axe? Egyptologists and archaeologists largely were the only ones to really ponder this. Not a safe mover with a massive brain. The details are in the basement. Following is the bare bones.

The great Pyramid of Giza stands 481' tall. The sides are 756' long. The slope is a tad under 52 degrees. It's made up of over 2.3 million blocks averaging 2.5' high and 3' x 4' wide and deep. The average weight is 5000 lbs. 203 levels make up the pyramid. The problem is getting a 2.5 ton block up 2.5' at a time with out a forklift. Do that once and then do it 202 times for the highest block. Here is the best way put forth in over 200o years. Set up 5 steps. The first is 6" high. Then 1', 1.5', 2', the top of the fifth step is even with the top of the level the block will sit upon.

The fine art below shows how to go up one step. Feel free to question, mock and ridicule this. If you don't understand something ask. The biggest thing I'm looking for is flaws in this process. The process is finished in the next post. Print them out and tape them to your fridge. Show them to your teachers and drinking buddies. E-mail to tenured professors and ask how a blue collar guy came up with this and they couldn't. Annoy as many people as possible. Try to claim as your own and I'll sue you. I could publish this or write a book on this and get rich. But then you know me. I just want to prove my brain is larger than Billo's.[/QUOTE]

Someone pleasegive me the skinny on posting images here. I've many and they will sooth your toubled minds. I've tried a couple of ways but no go. They will greatly lessen your confusion. Other wise I'll have to find a way around something and direct you elsewhere, then you'll stay there, learning.

It's hard to take you seriously with all that smack talk getting in the way.

To post that thread I need attachments. But in my first thread I explain it all in text. Good thing I did, but then I'm me. It's a dy read but if you want to know you gotta do it. Or the folks that got to see where I post this on another site can get all helpful and steer you. This is from quite some time ago.


You know how Lincoln Logs are notched at the ends so they link together with little or no space in the middle? Who do you think was the first to to think of that? Some professor in a tweed jacket with leather patched elbows or a guy in the woods with an axe? On this topic I'm the guy in the woods.


Why here?

I've only been on the net since last Thanksgiving or so. This site is about all I go to the net for. Except for some research on this topic right after this idea came to me. I like this site and those on it, mostly. The whole Billo thing speaks for itself. There's only two on this site I really don't like. All the smacking I do here is in fun. I get a little serious in the 9/11 thread. Now I get WAY serious. I'm sure my crazy self will leak into this, but what you gonna do? I post this in the basement because it's where I spend most of my time. Only registered, logged in members will be able to read this. And because it's near my precious monkeys. I expect, nay demand, this receives the upmost serious criticism. I may be wrong. There may be a glaring mistake I've missed. If this passes muster I may be privy to fame I don't seek nor want. But alas, it comes with the territory. I hope spell check has had it's coffee because this may receive much attention. Which, if I'm right, it well should. Because it's the way I am and to dispence with the greed factor so as to lend validity to my theory, I put this out there for free. In the professional and academic world there seems to be the swatting aside of those with novel ideas who don't have that piece of paper that says you're smart. No way could a blue collar guy like me come up with something that those people who have made their life's work pursuing have missed. How embarrassing. But you know me. I'll enjoy sticking it to them. Big time. This is something I feel the unwashed masses should get for free.

Enough already with the BS, what is it you ask?

What is perhaps the greatest terrestrial, non religious or philosophical question that mankind has pondered for over two thousand years? Besides how can Billo lose his car keys when they are in his pocket? Why the only remaining of the seven wonders of the world of course. How were the pyramids of Egypt built? For our conversation we will stick to The Great Pyramid. Though the tactics I speak of here apply to all great structures that baffle humanity. My theory, which I will for now on refer to as twiwdi, (the way I would do it), will show that the building of the great pyramid is not a architectural and enginering mystery but only a well run job site. Some of you can now shake your heads and go back to seeing what Billo, Navy, Skil and champs are fighting aboot, the rest of you, commence drooling, slack jawed with amazement.

Originally posted by Marchimedes

I'm smarter than you and no one can talk s**t better than me.

Quite a statement to make on ATS that you are smarter than people here. You've either not been around for very long or your are very naive.

The latter part of your above sentence though, i do not doubt......hence the fact that i stopped reading at that point. I may finish your post later i don't know.

What i do know though is that you have a theory, not THE answer. By all means be confident in your research and subsequent findings, thats an admirable quality in a conspiracy theorist i think, but to jump into a forum like ATS stating that it all ends with your theory......well lets say i've seen even the most knowledgable minds debunked here.

CX.

This is the reason it came to me. In the past, for ten years, I had a job installing and servicing bank equipment. Along with delivering lolly pops and paper forms, installing, delivering and servicing of office furniture, CCTV, tube systems, alarms and chairmats, I also built modular bank vaults, installed vault doors, safe deposit boxes, and, wait for it, safes. As the owner of the company was either cheap or liked to watch us sweat, we did not even have a forklift. Available to us was a van, a flat bed trailer, pallet jacks, jacks, cribbage, (lengths of various sized wood, mostly 2x4's and 4x4's), shims, various levers, (like crow bars of all sizes), cumalongs, plywood, and rollers. I and my buddy would show up to a bank with a two ton safe on the trailer and endure the usual "how are you two skinny guys going to get that in here"? Often many would watch in amazement our practical use of the lever and basic physics. I think my best compliment was when left alone with my tools and a 5000 lb. safe, after moving it across the floor and putting it in place perfectly level, (or the door swings knocking little tiny tellers on their butt), was to be called a magicine. After a while at this job I took to saying, "give me a couple of thousand slaves and I can build a pyramid". My only real problem was that though I could lift a safe up a height onto the next level, I couldn't, (using only what was available to the Egyptians), do it very safely in a timely fashion. The final light bulb went off in my head while watching TV of an unrelated subject aboot six months ago. I've only told my Father, Uncle, and Mother twidi. I told my Father, (a man with sizeable mechanical ability) and Uncle (who can't butter toast, sorry Uncle J), over the phone. My Father and Uncle both asked, "how come no one has thought of this before"? My answer was because no one with practical, similar hands on experience has put their massive brain to it. I've not seen a similar explanation in all my research. I think my Uncle still has doubts that I'm the first to come up with this. When I finally forced my Mother to sit down with me and my pen and paper, she went from rolling her eyes at me to being concerned with the attention twidi would get me. She was the first to clue me in on that. That is why I have thought so long on this before going public. My selfish concerns pales before the right for people to know. All I want is credit for this and for my kids to think I'm cool. So in other words people, I can move heavy stuff. I used to say if you're straining then you're doing something wrong. I may be stronger than I look but nobody can pick up a safe.

I will attempt to explain how the pyramids were built. Twidi will do this with the safest way, the least distance traveled, the least amount of energy used, the quickest method, using tools only available to the Egyptians, and explain why there is almost no archaeological evidence remaining as to how they did it. I've read that in order for the great pyramid to be built in the time alloted, a stone would have to be placed once every two minutes. Twidi does this.

Is there any chance you can put up some diagrams to help explain your theory?

Originally posted by CX

Originally posted by Marchimedes

I'm smarter than you and no one can talk s**t better than me.

Quite a statement to make on ATS that you are smarter than people here. You've either not been around for very long or your are very naive.

The latter part of your above sentence though, i do not doubt......hence the fact that i stopped reading at that point. I may finish your post later i don't know.

What i do know though is that you have a theory, not THE answer. By all means be confident in your research and subsequent findings, thats an admirable quality in a conspiracy theorist i think, but to jump into a forum like ATS stating that it all ends with your theory......well lets say i've seen even the most knowledgable minds debunked here.

CX.

Yea, that was cool huh? Guess you one of those wih no sense-o-humor eh? I say over and over again this is how it could be done, call it a theory, a method, not how it was done like some.

Told you I'd make a real bad first impression.

So I come in hard and ask for debunkment outright. You kinda lecture me about everyone getting debunked. Later in the posts I'll be going over people that can't see past appearences and attitude to get to the truth. Part of this crusade is pointing out human nature to the site where his comes from.

I also enjoy folks that don' read before spaz posting. Conspiracy theorist? I'm doing the opposite here. Show the possibility of guys with rollers and levers doing this, removing the cry of so many that it had to be aliens because no one can explain this. Till now. Normaly I'd now take you apart but I'm new here and don't know the limits here and want to get his down before THE CARNAGE THAT FOLLOWS. And you bo, have very swell carnage potential.

Originally posted by DodgeG1
Is there any chance you can put up some diagrams to help explain your theory?

Got tons already drawn. How do you post them here? Easy? Without a outside image service? But the text version first. Think.

To achieve perfect Plumb and level.

Plumb.

Simple here. A string with weight attached to it gives, (sans wind), perfect vertical. It's called a plumbob.

Level.

1. Two trains of thought here. They know they used the following device. Take a right triangle, (all measurements here are close, not perfect). Sides 5 3/16 x 7 1/2. Hold with hypotenuse down. Divide hypotenuse in half and mark. Attach string with pointer at bottom to top point of triangle. When two acute points are level pointer will match mark. Not a perfect system to be sure. As after 2500 years the base ends of the pyramid are less than 1" out of level it's not good enough for my tastes. Gives a rough level at best.

2.A widely accepted theory with some evidence to back it is the base of pyramid sits on bedrock. Dig trenches on a grid in bedrock for entire base of pyramid. Fill with water. Water finds it's own level. Grind bedrock over entire base down to water, fill in trenches, and you have a perfectly level base. Fine for this bottom only but then your back to the triangle for the next level.

3.Now we come to the first of my massive brain derived ideas. This may be out there but in my research I've yet to come across it. Imagine a 50' clear garden hose. Lay on base with each end, say, 3' at each end vertical. Fill with water to about 6" short of the tops of each end. Now where ever you drag this hose to the water at each end will be PERFECTLY level with each other. Imagine a large block viewed from the side. Hold hose up to each end and if the top right side of block is 1" above the water while the top left side is even with the water you know you have to raise the left end 1" or progressively grind down towards the right side 1". We know the blocks aren't shimmed so the stones had to come square from the quarries. Nothing new you say aboot water levels and you would be right. However the Egyptians didn't have plastic hoses. I suppose you could hold a custom made wooden trough up to the blocks and transpose from it but that's a little imperfect. A little off at the bottom is a lot at the top. Hard to to make a hose with the materials available to the Egyptians. No flexible water tight tubes around, or was there? And this is my thought. Turns out there was, and still is. Now one of my many epiphanies. Intestine. That's right guts. Interstines are in fact very long, flexible, water tight tubes. Sure they rot after a while but some one is always killing and eating some varmint. Proof kelzie couldn't make a pyramid. Poor Vegan. Ancient Egyptian water level, teacher style.



yea, this is way old. New ideas since. But good fo now.

To within inches the great pyramid base is true to square.

Laying out for square.

So we now have a level base upon which goes the first level of blocks. They knew the dimensions and just had to lay it out square. Here's how. Let me introduce my good friend Pythagoras. For whom I guess the Pythagorean Theory is named. Simply put. For any right triangle: A squared + B squared = C squared. In construction and other trades a simple way of utilizing this is to use the 3,4,5 triangle. That is, a triangle with the sides equalling 3', 4' and 5' will yield a perfact 90 degree corner. Apply this to the Egyptians. Take a length of rope, any length, triple it, and you have a base rope. Set aside. Take original rope and lay out 4 times, cut new rope to that length and you have the second side. Take original rope, lay out 5 times, cut new rope and you have the hypotenuse. Find corner of your pyramid to be, lay out #3 rope with right end at south east corner of pyramid and lay out to the west. Take #4 rope and start at east end of #3 rope and run north. Take #5 rope and match to the ends of the other two. Adjust until ropes are taunt and even at ends and you have an true square at south east corner. Don't worry We'll find true lines of direction in the next post. Transcribe lines from ropes to base and you have the square sides of a pyramid. At least bottom and right sides. Now just move your ropes to the next corner and repeat. The Egyptians knew the lengths of the pyramid's base before hand so it's not a big deal. Think a little for yourselves people. I want you to be able to clearly envision this in your minds eye. The south base measurement is 756.09227 feet in length. Hey, they could do math too you know. I, and many the good old boy in the know have used this on jobs for a long time. 3,4,5.

To check for square.

Square you length, double it, take the square root of that and you get 1069.2759 feet. Cut a rope exactly that length. Bring the ends to your south east and north west marks. If they match, so far so good. Do same to the south west and north east marks, if all match, you got yourself a big, perfect square.

Commence laying blocks.

Egyptians with bricks come,
Egyptians with blocks come.

Dr. Seuss, Fox in Sox. teacher style.

No sleep till Hammersmith baby. Caffeine and Marlboro's.

It will help if you get paper, pencil, a ruler and a compass for this post. Nothing new here either. Just a little help from remembering an old math teacher and my massive brain. Hold your breath while Billo uses sharp objects. Maybe a little prayer is in order. No, not to make him stick it in his eye.

Paper #1.

Get your paper at hand. For this class we'll go with north/south and east/west. I could use top/bottom and left/right but the first way will come into play later. Draw a 4" line n/s. This is line #1. With your compass point on the north point draw a circle with a 3" radius. This is arc #1. Do same at south point. This is arc #2. There are two points where the arcs intersect. The east intersection is point #1. The west point #2. Draw a straight line from these two points. This is line #2. Where it crosses line one is point #3. It perfectly bisects line #1. It is also perpendicular to line #1. This is how to find the midpoint of a line, soon to be a stick.

Paper #2.

New paper. We are now on the Giza Plateau. Level an area. Drive a 6' stick plumb 2' feet into the ground. As soon as the sun rises enough to give a shadow mark the top of the sticks west shadow point on the ground. This is point #1. When the setting sun gives you the last bit of shadow mark the sticks top shadow point on the ground. This is point #2. Connect the two points and you have an almost perfect east/west line. This is line #1. Horizon elevation can skew this I think. Not good enough for old teacher. We need to double check this.

Your line is going to be north of the stick. Drive two 6' sticks, 4' apart, plumb 2' into the ground at points one and two. East is stick #1, west stick #2. Attach a 6' stick level with equal amounts off the ends of sticks 1 and 2 to three feet above ground. This is stick #3. You have 1' off each end. The east attachment point is point #3, the west point #4. Find the midpoint between sticks 1 and 2 on stick 3. This point #5. Drive a 6' stick 2' plumb into the ground at this point. Stick #3 will be our new shadow making stick.
Next morning, wake up Billo, sight east down stick three and when the top of the sun hits it mark the shadow of stick #3's top. This is point # 6. In the afternoon go to the nearest, cheapest bar, rouse Billo and sight west down stick #3 and when the top of the sun lines up mark that spot. This is point #7. Draw straight line between points #6 and #7 and you, my realization is slowly dawning on you friends, is a PERFECT east/west line. This is line #2. Now, using what we learned on paper #1, bisect line #2 and find the perpendicular north/south line. This is line #3. Now you're gonna have to get a little creative sighting the sun perfectly. I want you to think. The best teacher teaches his students how to learn and inspires the student to go forward on their own. More sticks may be in order.

So now we have perfect north/south and east/west lines. To move these around you have but to use basic geometric tried and true principles. There's way more fun stuff we can do with geometry here. But nothing that I think at this point necessary. It's in my mind eye. You with me? If I have erred please point it out to me. I'm only quickly proof reading this. Like the Chinese say, "Wo shi yige nanren le".

Egyptians with bricks and blocks and hungover Billo comes.

Let's get into it.

The majority of the approximately 2.3 million blocks that make up the great pyramid were quarried aboot 500 yards to the south of the pyramids them selves. Many theories abound. I'm gonna smack them all.

One unanswered question of the building of the great pyramid is how did they transport the blocks there. One theory is that they made a packed earth road and slid the blocks on sleds with the blocks being pulled by a mule train of men if you will with the runners of sleds being lubricated with water. Seems like this way to this old safe mover is a good way to dig ruts. With the ruts constantly having to be repaired. The average block is 2 1/2' tall and 3' by 4', weighing 2 1/2 tons. That 5000 lbs. Billo. Let's dispence with the sled thing first. With 2.3 million blocks that is 4.6 million extra steps taken that does not need to be done. Putting the bocks onto sleds and then taking them off. Like I said, this to me is not a great mystery, just a well run job site. On jobs you have a thing called a schedule. 4.6 million steps is a deadline killer. I can explain the process of getting a 2 ton block on and off sleds but it's not necessary. maybe later in this thread. Dragging this much weight, no matter how many men you have, is just damn ridiculas. Some proport the use of rollers on a track system. Not bad but you need a well packed and made base for the rollers to stay workable over 2.3 million trips. Some dismiss the use of rollers, (logs), as they would be too much work and not readily available. I don't think the thought, "too much work", entered the Egyptians minds. They quarried and transported the largest pyramid stones and obelisks from up 500 miles away. So what's a few thousand logs? And when they where done with them and, as must have been, used them to ruin, they made a nice fire for folks like Billo to roast weenies with. Expains why they are not in evidence today. Logs as rollers are essential for twidi. What's one thing besides sand they had in abundance back then on the Giza Plateau? Blocks silly. The blocks if you don't know were expertly quarried and smoothed. Some joints you can't stick a pieace of paper between. They made a damn road out of blocks. Thick, hardy, and heavy, therefor not given to much movement. The first blocks out of the quarry they used for the first pavers in the road. They paved their way to the pyramid. The last blocks in the pyramid were from the road. The last paver was aboot the last block on the pyramid. They, as we know, could do math. They knew how many blocks they needed. The blocks that made the road are in the pyramid today. The last block out of the quarry was not the last block in the pyramid. The first paver in the road was the first of the pavers to be used in the finishing of the pyramid. Oh, just had some smack come to me. You know the insult, "may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits". Hows this? May all the hairs on Billo's back be lodged between your teeth. Don't you love the way my coconut works? But I digress. Rollers were staged on the length of the road. You can either have lots of guys, roller dogs I'll call them, whose only job it was was to keep the rollers squared away. One of many things I learned moving safes is that once you get a weight moving you want to keep it going. Much harder to start and stop to start again. The smooth road bed is also way important. Many is the time I have been moving a safe on a smooth concrete floor with metal rollers to be brought to a screeching halt by a tiny screw laying about. A clean, smooth path is essential to quick work with MUCH less effort. Think if every block gets halted only once that's 2.3 million pauses in the building of a pyramid. This idea also explains why there is no present evidence of how the blocks traveled to the pyramid. The evidence makes up the pyramid itself. In my research I've not seen this idea put forward. I can greatly reduce the number of roller dogs with my idea of a roller stay/pass by method but it's not necessary at this time. I'm going with the bare basics here. This idea alone is noteworthy over the present theories of how the pyramids were built. The ground breaking light bulb appearing over my head thought is still to come. Next post.

So a killer smooth and stable road road built by the stones that make up the pyramid itself covered in rollers, (logs), pulled by human mule teams, gets us quickly with less effort to the pyramid better than any other theory yet put forth.

How about it? New kids walks in, talks smack, boasts way huge, CX dodges something unimagined, then kid starts ripping it off. All that level and plumb stuff? Didn't think about it, plan it, research it, just started typing. Haven't checked it, proof read it, gotta be mistakes and room for improvement,I know one thing, mostly from remembered high school geometry and then expand.

How you like that road? That's new eh? That's all me CX. Get on it, go get some of those "most knowedgable minds" to come check this. Solves a lot don't it, that road? But that's not the gem. Refute me CX. Hasn't been done to my theory yet. Over a year.

Giddyup.

So, we have a road built to the prepared, level, squared pyramid base. The first of 203 levels is the easy one. Now we have to get a 2 1/2 ton block up 2 1/2 feet to the next level. Let me put forth the three main theories now so I can shred them later.

The first is the giant, straight ramp theory. The big problem with this is the ramp would use more material than the pyramid itself. There is also no credible evidence of such.

The second is a ramp which spirals around the pyramid. For one that is a whole lot of more distance traveled, up hill thank you, dragging big time weight. Also in question, in my mind only so far as I've read, is how do you attach a ramp to the smooth casing stones that used to face the pyramid. Also a major problem is the moving of the large stones such as used in the king's chamber around small corners. This old safe mover would have no part in that thank you. This idea also uses a huge amount of material, also not in evidence today.

The third is the step method. Closest by far to twidi. This uses the steps of the pyramid itself to rise the blocks up one level at a time. Two methods I know of for this.

The first was an old dude circa 450 bc. by the name of Herodotus. His idea was crane like counter balanced teeter tawters on every level. Very labor intensive and time consuming and dangerous in my view. Also doesn't account for the massive, (theorized weighing up to 70 tons), blocks as in the king's chamber, getting up to at least the 70th, at the bottom, level. The counter weight alone would need a counter weight. And you'd need redwood trees to make the lever. I just don't see it.

The second was illustrated in the PBS show NOVA titled "This Old Pyramid". There a stone mason named Roger Hopkins I think was in charge of some poor bastards to build a small pyramid to test this theory. If I were there the most I would let that guy do would be tug on the rope. This method uses levers to crib up a block to the next level. This is doable but is time consuming and dangerous. Before my epiphany this was the only way I saw to build the pyramid. But as it was too dangerous and time consuming I never pursued it. This I'll have to explain.

Cribbing for now is pieces of wood. Say 2x4"s and 4x4"s in 4' lengths. We will use two views here. We are on the south side of the pyramid looking north for a side view and from the top, south being the bottom of our view. Top view. We have the first level in place. Now we have to get the first block of the second level up onto that level. I'd best at this point explain the system I'll use to help envision twidi.

Imagine the first level of the pyramid being 100 blocks square. We'll set this up on a grid/graph type deal. From the top view, the south west corner is block 0/0. The columns go in increasing order from left to right. The rows the same from bottom to top. Block 0/0 is the south west corner. Block 100/100 is the north east block. The north west corner block is 0/100. The south east block is 100/0. Got it? Good. Imagine our first block of the second row sits south of block 50/0. I had to do this once with a 5000 lb. safe, up about two feet. Scared the hell out of me. And I i was using todays machined, square 2x4"s and 4x4"s on a perfectly flat, level surface on to the next flat, level surface. Even scarier using what the Egyptians had. So our 3' x 4' x 2 1/2' foot high block sits where I said. Running north/south under the east and west sides of the block run two 4x4"s. You put a lever end under the south middle of the block running north/south and lever the south edge up high enough to slide like a log cabin a 2nd level 4x4" running east/west so it sits on the south ends of the level one cribs. Set back down. Now we have to get a crib under the north side of the block. Stay with me. The block sits next to the south end of the row so we can't get a lever in from the north side running north/south. Place lever under the east side of block at the north edge. Place weight down on top of the south east corner. This will rock the north west corner up and the south east corner down so you can slide the second east/west northern crib on level two of our log cabin. Our block is now up two levels on our log cabin. Level three north/south cribs are next. This go round is easier because you don't have to play the rocking game. But back to it next level. When bottom of block is even with the top of the first row blocks your cribs must be running north south. This time instead of east/west cribs we use rollers. Roll off of log cabin onto east/west rollers allready placed on block level two. Keep on rollers to move to far back corner. Remember, we have a deadline and even to the Egyptians time is money. Or food for slaves. Wow. That was friggin tedious, but necessary. Two problems with this way are as the higher you get on cribs the more precarious your perch. Also the heightened fulcrum gets dicey. like I said, I've only had to do this once and it kept me on my toes. Imagine doing that to 2.3 million blocks. Working day and night for thirty years you'd be hard pressed to meet your deadline with enough living and unmaimed workers. Like I said, I've come up with a safe, simple way around this. Next post is money time. To see Roger Hopkins do this on NOVA took all my courage to watch that amateur. That guy had no right exposing those workers to such danger. I wouldn't expose even Billo to such danger. And that is the best we had to date. Until this old safe mover came along. You with me so far?

Note: Billo's head makes for a good fulcrum. Besides, it can't possibly do any damage.

Originally posted by Marchimedes

Normaly I'd now take you apart but I'm new here and don't know the limits here and want to get his down before THE CARNAGE THAT FOLLOWS. And you bo, have very swell carnage potential.

You have voted Marchimedes for the Way Above Top Secret award. You have two more votes this month.

The above vote is based purely on the basis that it's the only post for a long time to give me a good belly laugh! Ok fill your boots Mark, i'll leave you to it.

Good luck.

CX.

Hang on to your knickers Nurse. It's go time.

So, we are here. Nigh before where I post THE epiphany. I'm all a titter.

(In the voice of Bevis). Uh huh. He said titter.

I've done my best to keep my insanity out of my posts so far. With much success I think. For me any way. Here we go kids.

So kids, we are the point where we have to raise a block from the ground onto the first level of blocks. I have a couple of ways to do this, I choose this one.

We have the first second level block up against block 45/0. The view is now from the south side. The height of the first level is 2 1/2'. The block is 2 1/2' tall, 3' deep x 4' wide, and weighs in at 5000 lbs. 4' runs with the row.

Here it is.

From the top view. We are gonna add some rows of blocks. Remember the one thing the Egyptians had in abundance besides sand is blocks. We are gonna add two rows. Rows -1 and -2. These will be our block raising rows. For this demonstration, imagine they run the length of the base. Keeps it simple for now. This is a hellova thing to describe something visual in text. If you think it is ponderous to read, imagine typing such. We'll say the depth of these rows is 4'. A little deeper than the normal 3'. Gives us a little play to work with. Safety and expediency dictates such. Our block now sits on 2" rollers. Much the same as we got it here. Maybe. To the left is a 6" high, 4' deep, 6' long block butt up against the row zero lenghtwise. Our block sits atop it's rollers with the west end against the first 6" "step". Running north/ south smack (hehe) against the west end of the first 6" step is a 1 3/4" high crib. We insert a lever under the east end of the block running east/west with the lever resting on a fulcrum at least 4" in tallness. Push down on high end of lever, the west end of block does not go to the ground but catches on our crib there. Lever end goes to ground. Making the middle end of the block raise at least more than than 4" off the ground. Insert 4" roller running north/south dead under the middle of the block. Release lever. The block in a perfect world is now balanced on the 4" roller. We may have to lay a finger on the east end of the block to force the east end to ground. The human mule team pulling the always attached rope will start to pull west. The block will be stopped either by the east end dragging on the ground, or the west end bottom dragging on the east end top of the 6" step. Our west end of the block now over shoots the east end of the step and is over the pre-placed 1 3/4' roller on the east end of that first step running north/south. Now keep in mind we don't want the east end of the block to drag on the ground lest we not be able to get a lever under it. Unless of course there is an indent or out crop at the bottom middle east end of the block to receive said lever. The sweet part is that there is evidence that one or both exists. If not, then a small crib must be pre-placed under the east end of the block running east/west so as to facilitate the room for the lever to be paced again under the east end of the block. Place a at least 4' fulcrum under the lever and lift the east end of the block up to at least 7 3/4". Take out our 4" roller and replace at the middle and 3/4 distant on the east end from the west end of the block with two 7 3/4" rollers running north/south. Let lever down. Now our block sits on thick rollers on the low side and thin rollers on the high side. I can now by myself push said block on to the next 1' high step. Lather, rinse, repeat until you get to the next, 1 1/2' step and so on until our block is on the top step even with the the top of the next level. I wont tell you cretins how to change north/south running rollers to east/west running rollers and back again with out appropriate questions. Again, a good teacher inspires his students HOW to think, Not WHAT to think. Now, class, our steps jog to the east, same deal, only reversed. Lather, rinse, repeat all the way to level #203.

That, class, in a fair and just world, is a Nobel Prize winning paragraph. No joke. Coming from me you should understand the enormity of me saying, "no joke". That tiny slew of words solves a 2500 year old question. TWO FRIGGIN THOUSAND FIVE FRIGGIN HUNDRED years this question has eluded the so-called best and brightest among us. Makes me question the so-called "scientists and their global warming" bull#. Engage your brains, take it to the next level, never take for granted what the "esteemed academians" tells us. Force them, as I have done here, to put it into "laymans terms". If they can't or aren't willing then they are full of shi*t or stupid and holding onto tenure by the hair of their chinny chin chins. And I, teacher, of the massive brain, did it. Please try your damnedest to find fault. I ask you, of the top 1% of the American public, to try your best to wrap your massive brains around this. Just like the 9/11 thread. Puts that little dog and pony show in perspective I think. How you like me now Canuck?

That, folks, is the bare bones of twidi. As much as I've posted, I've at least double the amount up my sleeve. Details, original thoughts, answers to your forthcoming questions, (I hope), to be sure. I've another slant on the stated twidi and yet another option that lets blocks be dragged up to the top with out a stop. But I don't think they were that smart. Takes way more set up time but cuts down way much on the block moving process. If you think this version was long winded you should hear that one. I have left little bits and pieces out of twidi for the sake of brevity for this first go round and consequently leave openings for your sure to come inept tries to dog me. I have the answers to the staging and placement of the large blocks, my roller stay/pass by idea, the safe and expedient loading and unloading of the truly massive blocks onto and off of the barges, and the staging and placement of said massive blocks. My principles will work on the raising of other large structures, Stonehenge, the South American pyramids, building the Sphinx, raising obelisks, and to include what the native Cairo population was doing what/when. The slowest part of the process in my mind is the actual quarrying of the blocks. Just as I've been mulling over 9/11 since, well, 9/11, I've been noodling this one since the late '80's. I DO have all the answers. Try me. I beg you. Do better than the dipshi*ts in the 9'11 thread. I'm up to the challenge. It will just make me look better and educate you. You who have read twidi now know more than the best and brightest in the entire figgin architectural and so-called Egyptologists world. These posts ARE the final words to date on this subject. Only I know more than you, who now knows more than the leather elbow patched tweed jacketed Oxford educated pinky extended while drinking their afternoon tea muckity-mucks. I moved objects of the same weight and dimensions with the same tools for ten friggin years. I do by rote and with barely breaking a sweat what those esteemed eggheads would throw their back out trying to do to no avail. Go find your local safe mover and run this by them. They'll just nod and go, "yep".

Just wait for the multiple Top Tens on this subject. Be there for the day in the life of an average pyramid worker. Get ready for my insightful thoughts of human nature inspired ideas of WHY the pyramids were built.

The night of the day I came up with the step method I had a livid, full color dream. I was in charge of all the Egyptians. I was wearing blue shorts and white Nike's speaking English to the Egyptian speaking workers while baking under the brutal Egyptian sun. I saw this work and tasted the salt in my sweat that night in my dream. It worked well. Make no bones aboot it.

Vauge. As this IS my intellectual property I'm going to edit this thread down to my words only. In the morning I'm going to Kinko's to have the hard copy time/date notarized. If this in any way violates the law please inform me and I will eat the hard copy and give the ensuing feces to my monkey army to fling, (with most excellent accuracy I might add), at Billo.

Tell this to everybody please people. I'll, with Vauge's leave, be passing hardcopies out like Pez. Let's have an average Joe's ground swell uprising against those who think they are smarter then us. I give this out for free. I pondered the publishing of a choice scientific paper. I mused over the possibility of publishing a book on this matter. You kids know by now I'm not all that bad at writing. I can pen a book. I wont lower myself to calling myself an "aspiring author". Though the outcome would be the bastard child of Einstein's theory of Relativity meets "The Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy". I can write. Don't bother trying to tell me I can't. The proof, as it were, is in the pudding.

Now give me some critique. Good or bad. And do try to throw some smack in. I so love it when I get what I give. Gives me the chuckles. Make me spew beverages out my nose. Bring it!

Originally posted by bramski
It's hard to take you seriously with all that smack talk getting in the way.

Why? Do comics have to be stupid? Scientists dull? This is part of what I'm railing against. If I save a life with CPR do they care if I'm wearing a hat with a propeller on top? I'm trying to do something different. I'm trying to make it as hard on myself as possible to better test my idea and I just like a challange. And make no bones about it, this is how I am. I'm friggin nuts. Were I to get all stoggy and serious I'd be presenting a false front. I enjoy entertaining and annoying those I don't entertain. I haven't wore a tie in over twenty years. I will not take this through the "approved process" because that don't make this correct or not. Some of you will get used to me. Believe me, I'm way behaving right now.


Lemme know if this is within the rules that I'll never read.

I'm entrenched on a political debate forum. I hold sway there over the unwashed masses. Humor, satire, commemtary, debate, my own thread, shtick, features, inventions, advice, tips, abuse, insults, carrtoons, dawingsand all the big pointy thing in the desert stuff. I've about 4500 posts, all classic, and my thread has 40000 views. I don't lie and I let it all hang out. You can't hurt my feelings. If allowed private message me or whatever you call sending me a note and I'll give you the place. But don't worry you bosses. I'll post all my pyramid stuff here and try to behave. I laid off of CX's stuff right?

Originally posted by CX

Originally posted by Marchimedes

Normaly I'd now take you apart but I'm new here and don't know the limits here and want to get his down before THE CARNAGE THAT FOLLOWS. And you bo, have very swell carnage potential.

You have voted Marchimedes for the Way Above Top Secret award. You have two more votes this month.

The above vote is based purely on the basis that it's the only post for a long time to give me a good belly laugh! Ok fill your boots Mark, i'll leave you to it.

Good luck.

CX.