Ask... El Pollo Diablo

El Pollo Diablo . . .

Is my father with you? If so, was he in my apartment with me last night?

Originally posted by notbuynit
Diablo, will my team finally win the Super Bowl this year? New Qb and all but he's supposed to be pretty good.

Oh, great and terrible El Pollo Diablo! Hear this petitioner's query. What message shall pass from thee to we?

...

"Bah! Whats is its with all of these pertaining to sports questions? This is being the last ones of these I answers. And I covers this for everyones: Daunte Culpepper is goings to have cases of butterfingers; Steve McNairs will fall behind dues to fungus in shoulder pads, but bleaches and steams will clear this ups, and he will has a season of breaking records; Phillip Rivers, AKA Pretty Boy Phill, will suffers traumatic experiences on Its Being Small Worlds at Disneylands. After some therapies, he will be on tops of his games again, causing Marty Schottenheimer much reliefes.

The real guys to being watching is the Eagles of Philidelphia #88 Mike Bartrum. Hes is a super nice fellow. Thank you. Come again."

Originally posted by Gazrok
Great Devil Chicken....

Are you related to Gollum?

Oh, great and terrible El Pollo Diablo! Hear this petitioner's query. What message shall pass from thee to we?

...

"Let's me start offs by saing no. I understands the confusions, but that Gollums talks more with a sinister sound of being rasping and choked, yes? I's on the other hands, both of them, is speaking more like Inigo Montoya, from the Princesses Bride. Or that devilishly rougishness of the Mexican wrestler Strongbad, no? After all, we is all Spanish-type rascals. Well, not Gollums, yes? Thank you. Come again."

Originally posted by denynothing
hello i am wondering about something do i get a scholarship to college or do my grades collapse in highschool, also i wonder about who i marry is it someone i no

Oh, great and terrible El Pollo Diablo! Hear this petitioner's query. What message shall pass from thee to we?

...

"Well denysnothings, heres what I has for yous. A scholarship with your naming on it is waiting for you! Good news, yes? The poorly side of the news is that it is a shcolarship for beings a mime. So keeps your grades in the ups and ups, and be getting involved in your schools program of instruction involving theaters. If your school has not one of these, being starting one!

For your being the second of questions, it is always bests to be marrying someone you knows, yes? Thank you. Come again."

Originally posted by S1LV3R4D0
According to my spanish speakin co-worker, he thinks that pollo is used when referring to chicken meat not the actual chicken itself. So technically i think its the devils chicken meat...

Oh, great and terrible El Pollo Diablo! Hear this petitioner's query. What message shall pass from thee to we?

...

"Of courses it means chickens meats! Which do you think be scaring English sea dogs more and mores? A little chickens with horns, or a bads case of the salmonella? You dos the maths, yes?"

Originally posted by euwhajavb
Hey, El Pollo Diablo...

What should I focus on now in my life?

What is my girlfriend's name? (no question too small)

How can I, specifically, change the world.

Oh, great and terrible El Pollo Diablo! Hear this petitioner's query. What message shall pass from thee to we?

...

"Well euwhajavb, it is time you be focused on the constructions trade for a while. Learns hows to be working with concrete and the laying of brick. It is a good trades, and when the housing bobble inevitably bursts, you can be pursuing career as an industrial maker of arts, yes?

As for your girlfriend, I calls her 'dumpling'. She knows me as that Spanish rogue that haunts her dreams. I's sorrys euwhajavb, that's just the ways we roll. Looks on the bright siding: I is merely a spirit and not much of a threats to your relationship.

To make change abouts the world, I has being sick and tired of the sayings 'thinks globally, acting locally'. But neverthelesson, it is true. Bill Gates has his foundations buying computers for starving childrens. Whys? So's they can buy things on ebays? You wants to makes change, smile mores, give hugs thats you mean, and understands that much of the worlds problems comes from pains and fears. To sum up, works on improving your own neighborhoods (if everyone dids that, the world would change, no?), but support the deaths penalty because somes people just needs killing.

Thank you. Come again."

Originally posted by dvd500
one question Pollo Diablo


WHY?

...

"Because I loves, damns you! Because I loves!"

Originally posted by Hurricane
El Pollo Diablo . . .

Is my father with you? If so, was he in my apartment with me last night?

Oh, great and terrible El Pollo Diablo! Hear this petitioner's query. What message shall pass from thee to we?

...

"Hurricanes: He is not with mes at the current timing of moments. He is being out back arm wrestling Greg Boyington. So far he's got Boyingtons on the ropes, and he just called him a 'sissy mary jarhead'. Gregs is mad, but there doesn't seems much he cans do abouts it.

Waits. He just sents me a note. It says... 'Tell that cargo shipping panty waist boy of mine that I will wear whatever G..D.. cologne I want to. Maybe I think that HE smells bad.'

Ooh. He just pinned Boyington, and Greg sure is angrys. I think he wants to rassle, now. I'm going to go watch. Thank you. Come again."

Will 8-Tracks ever come back?

I'm still saving my Hudson Brothers set.

El Pollo Diablo,



I have this burning sensation and I have no idea from what or where it came from.....do you?

Also, what is the recipe for Wendy's Chile?

Originally posted by Hurricane
Will 8-Tracks ever come back?

I'm still saving my Hudson Brothers set.

Oh, great and terrible El Pollo Diablo! Hear this petitioner's query. What message shall pass from thee to we?

...

"Hurricanes, if yous keeps coming back I may have start charge you of ATS points. But yes, the tracks of 8 will come back. Current technologies will proves to fragile in the longs run and there will be much gnashings of teeth until tracks of 8 and betamax re-emerge to provide entertainments for us all! Thank you. Come again."

Originally posted by SportyMB
El Pollo Diablo,

I have this burning sensation and I have no idea from what or where it came from.....do you?

Also, what is the recipe for Wendy's Chile?

Oh, great and terrible El Pollo Diablo! Hear this petitioner's query. What message shall pass from thee to we?

...

"Thank you SportysMB for visitings. Glad to have yous. Firsts of all, I am sensing two things, and because of the solar type flares I am having some troubles with my diagnosis. Your burning sensation is either being caused by some nasty funguseses, probablys cultivated by some evil co-worker at work, who then sneakily applied them to your underarms deoderant. For this, Lamasil AF seems to works pretty goods. If that does nots clear it ups, then the others being of possibility is inverse psoriasis. This is a treatable and non contagious type of shame. A succsessful applications of cortosteroids presribed by a reputable physician or witch doctor should do the tricks. If that still doesn't works, and I is slowly to mention this, you has probably been cursed, but fear nevers! A simple gris gris of walnut shells, essence of rhodedendron flowers, crushed tortises shell, and the umberella from a mint mojito (mmm... tasty) should fixes you right up.

Wendy's Chili Recipie:
2 lbs. fresh ground beef
1 qt. tomato juice
1 (29 oz.) can tomato puree
1 (15 oz.) can red beans, drained
1 medium onion (1 1/2 c.), chopped
1/2 C. celery, diced
1/4 C. green pepper, diced
1/4 C. chili powder
1 tsp. cumin (if you like real flavor, add more)
1 1/2 tsp. garlic powder
1 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. each: black pepper, oregano, sugar
1/8 tsp. cayenne pepper
Methods/steps
In a frying pan, brown the ground beef; drain. Put the drained beef and the remaining ingredients into a 6-quart pot. Cover the pot; let it simmer for 1 to 1 1/2 hours, stirring every 15 minutes.

Don't forgets the celerys. I know it is weirds, but peoples always forgets the celeries. Then they cry 'Oh why hasn't my Wendy's Chili Recipie been greats? Why is it not full of hearty success?'. It is the celerys.

Thank you. Come again."



[edit on 8/10/2006 by hogtie]

Dear El Pollo Diablo,

Is there a special place in the after-life for gold-digging ex-wives?

Originally posted by Hurricane
Dear El Pollo Diablo,

Is there a special place in the after-life for gold-digging ex-wives?

Oh, great and terrible El Pollo Diablo! Hear these petitioners' query. What message shall pass from thee to we?

...

"What did I says to you about so many accursed questions? You are like a tick with spotted fever from the rocky mountains. I could kill you but your heads stays under the skin, and on tops of that you make me sick to where my joints ache. So's I answers your question:

Yes there is a special place. It is rights here by my sides. All the fine ladies come flockings to me in the afterlivings, mostlys because yous guys don't know how to treats your womens. You're all 'hey yous, get me my beer! Hey yous, change the tvs chanelling, and don't use the remotes control! Hey yous, fix me my dinner of flank steak and peas!' This is how you roll as well, yes? I knows you do. I knows all abouts it. The ladies comes to me because I treats them wells. I strokes their hair, gives them foots massages, calls them turtledoves. They loves that.

Thank you. Come again."

Yesterday, can it have only been yesterday?, you said to attract my dream girls I should be more suave, only one question oh great and enlightened El Pollo Diablo. How does turning myself into a bottle of shampoo aid my cause?

I was going to bring up the fact that the gas prices haven't changed any, much less gone down, but I won't...my old priest and the young priest ran away to become PC pirates, or some such thing.

Originally posted by seagull
Yesterday, can it have only been yesterday?, you said to attract my dream girls I should be more suave, only one question oh great and enlightened El Pollo Diablo. How does turning myself into a bottle of shampoo aid my cause?

I was going to bring up the fact that the gas prices haven't changed any, much less gone down, but I won't...my old priest and the young priest ran away to become PC pirates, or some such thing.

Tuning in for clarification. Nnnnnnnnnn...

...

"I see where your problem is. You are pronouncing suaves wrong. You are pronouncing it like mauves, guava. This is the wrongs. Notice that I said that you must be swave. It is an "sw" sound, with the long a sounds after. It is sounding like 'wave'. You must act swaaaaaaaves. Do this, and you have no problems with attracting the womens. Using shampoo is also a good step, yes? So keep ups the progresses.

But these gassing prices. I told you they was going to go ups! Ups! And I told you to buy the BP stocks in a couple of weeks. What elses do you wants from me? And as for the olds and youngs preists gone missings, make sure that all of the altar boys in your township are safe at homes and not being missings. This is very importants!

Thank you. Come again."

Hey, I think I actually like this thread.

But was'nt it in Personal Predictions Forum yesterday?

And I should have a request sooon. Still have'nt heard from Miss Cleo.

[edit on 8/10/2006 by Mechanic 32]

why do i become a mime and what school would give a scholarship for mimes, is there any way i could change that i would rather go to nebraska university for baseball or football, whats the name of the person i marry

Devil chicken. My request is a simple one. When were you born and when did you die. Simple no.

Ohhh, El Pollo, you slay me. :-D hahaha.

I have a few other questions.

What should I do about my hydrochloride?

Is a trip to New York a good idea?