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(DOC) The welcoming committee

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posted on Jul, 27 2006 @ 03:27 AM
“Welcome ladies and gentlemen. A warm welcome. I hope you’ll enjoy your stay, although I doubt it. There’s a only a few… You, Mr. Bin Ladin… I thought I told you to hold questions until I’m done?”


Zippit. Where was I? Oh yeah. Warm. Rules… You are more than welcome to enter the pools, although I wouldn’t suggest it. That said, most of you will end up in the pools at one stage or another. It’s part of the package. Keep in mind that we don’t have any lifesavers here. I suggest you wear the proper attire. Any questions about the pool rules?… Mr. Hussein?”

“Are we allowed to take anything with us to the pools?”

“What did you have in mind?”

“A glass of water perhaps?”

“Glass of wa…Hahaha! Oh the new arrivals are always good for a laugh. No. Or let's put it this way: If you can find a glass of water, you can take it with you… Hehe. Any more questions? Good, let’s move on. The basement chambers are reserved for one-on-one … Err … treatments. Don’t go there until you are sent there. Questions? … Mr. Bush?”

“What do you mean ‘treatments’?”

“Why spoil the surprise Mr. Bush? Now you have something to think about, until you get there. Although I think you’ll be one of the first of this group to go to the tort … err … treatment chamber. Moving on. No feeding the dogs at the gates. They get all leftovers from the ... treatment chamber. No need to mention that they are well fed. Getting a bit fat if you ask me. We recently introduced a ‘running with the dogs program’ to keep them in shape.”

“You mean we’ll get to take the dogs with us on a jog?”

“Mr. Blair? Did I say you could ask any questions? And no… You won’t be running with the dogs but away from the dogs.”

“Now, to finish of. There will be no singing, no dancing, no sex, no eating, no drinking, no praying, no talking, no light – except at the pool areas – nothing we can do about that, no whistling, no going to the toilet, no bothering the Big Chief with your pesky questions. That’s the basics. You’ll soon enough find out what else you are not allowed to do. Any final questions? … Mr. Mugabe?”

“What are we allowed to do?”

“Ah. That’s a good question. You can and will be doing a lot of crying and screaming – could we please keep the screaming down to a minimum? Some people need their beauty sleeps. Then there will be the inevitable bleeding and suffering.”

“How long is this going to go on?”

“Mr. Bin Ladin, speaking out of turn again? If you read your Bible, you would have seen that it’s damnation for all eternity.”

[edit on 27-7-2006 by Gemwolf]

posted on Jul, 28 2006 @ 10:05 PM
Funny stuff! What you did with your story is what I love about fiction. You can rewrite, or in this case, prewrite history.

posted on Jul, 31 2006 @ 09:28 PM
I enjoyed it however in the beginning I wasn't sure if we in a jail or in hell, it wasn't quite clear, I didn't think hell had pools

posted on Aug, 1 2006 @ 02:07 AM

Originally posted by worldwatcher
I enjoyed it however in the beginning I wasn't sure if we in a jail or in hell, it wasn't quite clear, I didn't think hell had pools

LoL... Well that was more or less the point. To hide the fact that they were "down under" until the very end. So I achieved what I wanted to...

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