BTS Improv

.............. where at least we can run and sing in peace, and meet the badn boston and then travel to the unknown dark streets in boston and have some boston tea parties and the run to the boston....................

....tatoo parlor where we can have "I love my Mother" and "Born to Raise Hell"
Written in blue ink by Sailor Jerry on our biceps. Now just you wait a minute; listen....sorry....I thought I heard someone chanting one of those "mantras" something about om um yum. Nevermind it was just my mind playing tricks on me. Don't you just hate it when....


[edit on 20-7-2006 by whaaa]

fall out a plane without a parachute, that happened to me just the other day and luckily I landed on.......................

[edit on 20-7-2006 by Xeros]

............... a cow, that had the name of james, he went to town making sounds that coul dnot be nice and holy, but just then out of the pen came a nice............

chicken with a plate of pies attatched to its back with a note reading.....................

.......... please help me, I am lesbian trapped inside a mans body, I do not know what to do, someone please help, its freezing hot up in here..... and then...............

...like a stinking bolt of lightning all the pizzas in the land took a life on thier own
and began to dance the mambo with anybody with in dancin range. But the heat in downtown Brazil was oppresive and the toppings started sliding of onto the carpet and the pizzas and the dancers were slip, slidding away into a strange place that looked a lot like Detorit with out the palm trees. But when your lost in the rain in Juarez and its easter time too....

...... you always stumble upon an easter egg where you will find too.... a cheesemonger and some more people talking about these three guys named.........

....Chedder, Monterey Jack and Brie. Those wacky rascals from Wisconsin. They live up in the dells and really live large up there with all the tourist and nite life.
ssssshhhhh. Keep this under your hat....they are secret agents working for...

...Tweedle Dee, Tweedle Dum and Zeb. The Tweedles are a little on the geeky side, but Zeb is a living god among men, sorta like Johnny Depp, except without the pirate get-up. Anyway, the Tweedles and Zeb have partnered with...

...............Chedder, Monterey Jack and Brie, to help save himanity and fight pollution with..................

A man by the name of..................CAPTAIN PLANET! Mr planet arrived on earth via.........................

...the Infinite Improbability Drive, piloted by a manic-depressive robot and some poor bloke hankering for a decent cup of tea. Unfortunately for Capt. Planet, he forgot to bring his towel and is unable to find a decent white sale due to...

.....spotty to nonexistant mail service, painfully slow dial up and vandals stealing the personal notes stuck to the door of his rocket ship with duct tape. Capton Planet though is a resorceful lad and called his good friend, Dreadlock Carl via his cricket phone. "ese Carlos, que paso" said Capn' Planet in his best imatation of a wetback, is K-mart.....

....running a blue light special? I'm in dire need of a fluffy towel and a sense of humor. D-Carl, who was rudely awakened from blissful slumber, curses under his breath and asks, "dude, what the hell is wrong with you, it's 10 a.m.! Are you smokin' crack again?" Capt. Planet does his best to apologize, but is distracted by...

.....three cheese heads snooping around his trailer. Capn' Planet, quick as a flash grabs a nine iorn stashed in the corner for exactly this type of confrontation. "Show yourselves, you smarmy bastards" our hero yells. Just then Montery Jack takes the garden hose and soaks Planet good and proper. Laughter rings out in the.....

...theatre, as audience members clamber to their feet in a standing ovation, shouting, "author, author." The stage curtains draw to a close, and everyone sits down waiting for the next act to begin...

......the house lights dim and the maroon 5 curtains open to a completely bare stage save for a solitary figure seated on what appears to be a sack of peanuts. The figure stands, raises his arms and begins to speak....

..."Three sightless rodents, three sightless rodents. Observe how they scurry. Observe how they scurry. Their tiny paths intertwine with the agricultural engineer's domestic partner, who detaches their hind appendages with a sharp kitchen utensil. Three sightless rodents. Three sightless rodents." As he speaks a single tear rolls down his cheek, then...

............ this fat cow walks out of the bathroom singing a jimmy buffet song, yes it is magaritaville, and then walks up to the these three guys standing on the street and says.............