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I Am Your Master

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posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 09:23 AM
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Originally posted by Your Master
I am the one who knows. Ask me and I will reveal the truth.


I been lookin' for you, pal.

1) Why can't women put on mascara with their mouths closed?

2) Why don't you ever see the headline, "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

3) If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy friends for her?

4) How can CFCs get to the stratosphere if they're heavier than air?

5) Why does a dog get angry when you blow in his face, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

6) Who put the ram in the ramalama ding dong?

7) Will your answer to this question be "no"?

We'll start there.

Oh yeah, welcome and stuff.




posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 11:51 AM
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loam,
George, How did you know???

Byrd
This is not the forum for a mathematical theory. You ask only to test and do not really seek the answer.
A “two-holed torus” can be a good design for your new handbag.(not ment for you to understand)

Denied
The first one.
I Am Your Master

MagicaRose
Being "The Chosen One" is a dificult task since it all depends on "The Chosen One".

Now let me humor you yeahright
1) Why can't women put on mascara with their mouths closed?

Because stretching their skin makes them look better.

2) Why don't you ever see the headline, "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Because no one ever reports it.

3) If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy friends for her?

It's not friends for her, it friends for a little girl that tricked you.

4) How can CFCs get to the stratosphere if they're heavier than air?

Chlorofluorocarbons? Density. Does a drop of color in water stay in one place?

5) Why does a dog get angry when you blow in his face, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Its about feeling, Do you scratch when you don't itch? Maybe when you a trying to figure me out.

6) Who put the ram in the ramalama ding dong?

Murphy

7) Will your answer to this question be "no"?

no

yes


I Am Your Master



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 11:57 AM
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Denied
The first one.
I Am Your Master


You are NOT my master, you are a new member with the usual attitude that piss us off.

Why dont you head for the joke section on BTS?

[edit on 23-6-2006 by Denied]



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:10 PM
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Originally posted by Your Master


Now let me humor you yeahright


Hey, I'm all about the humor. I believe my work here is done. Carry on.



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:10 PM
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Originally posted by Aelita
Having read the truly cunning words of Yours, oh Master, I think you deserve a second title, "Baiter".


[edit on 23-6-2006 by Aelita]


BURN!!!! lmao well done.

so back on topic, so you're my master? answer me a question... whats the meaning of my life? and i dont want any of that "it varys from person to person" junk, wot is the meaning of MY life?

btw ive only been a member for a while and ive seen alot of these people come.. and go, i like the last bit better myself lol

peace out

TheOne



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:11 PM
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o hi mr um your master if u no everything than tell me the answer to a very advanced question





will i get married ?





whats ur answer



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:19 PM
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You have been asked several times - What are you the master of? I wonder where the loonies keep coming from. I will kneel to no master, not you nor anything that is walking upright on this planet. If you are the "Master" show up here in 3 minutes. I figure if you are the master you can pick up my thought of what a nut case you are.
Well it's been 3 minutes and no you, so take a hike bozo.



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:21 PM
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Welcome Master. I long to thrown myself at our feet and follow your teachings.

But you must first bring me truth.
These are relatively simple questions for someone a person who would be my master.

What is my favourite comic?

What have i just finished studying in college (3 subjects)

How old was I when my dad died?

What is the one thing I hate about ATS?


I await your truth.



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:26 PM
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Hi "YourMaster",

Just wanted to drop in and Welcome you to ATS and congratulate you upon your completion of the school year. Any summer camp plans? (Just trying to get a handle of how long we'll have to deal with your attitude?).

Welcome!



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:31 PM
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WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT DO YOU WANT?

Image hosted by photobucket just for you.

You have 1 hour to talk. Lets have it.

If you want attention, you're doing a fine job. Eventually all threads die--dont count on the fun lasting too long. Or your membership if you have nothing to offer.



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:31 PM
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*clapping*
yay! I'm amused!
Thank You, Master.
-Raven



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:34 PM
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are you the master of baiting? i need fishing lessons...i can neve get that part right.

and if you are the master of knowlege, answer me this. How long do you really think youre going to be staying here with that attitude?



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:38 PM
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Wow Mr. Your Master, this is the first time I see a thread under Introductions got under "Hot Discussion" on the ATS home page.

Congratulations, what an amazing feat you achieved!



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:40 PM
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Honey, knock it off.....

I still need some shirts ironed and dishes are still piled up in the sink.



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:47 PM
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Tough crowd.


I guess I'm missing the "attitude" everyone else is seeing. Seems to me just a guy doing a little harmless goofin'. Easy enough to ignore, if you want. Actually, I thought his responses to me were at least creative.

But that's just me. I've got a pretty high threshold for "different".



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:48 PM
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Oooo! I love these games, and what a great prize.

If I answer right, I get a servant! YES!!! Okay, here's my attempt.


Originally posted by JackofBlades
is my favourite comic?


x-Men


Originally posted by JackofBlades
What have i just finished studying in college (3 subjects)


Oooo, tough one. Graphic Design, Art, and Astronomy.


Originally posted by JackofBlades
How old was I when my dad died?


Trick Question. He hasn't died yet.


Originally posted by JackofBlades
What is the one thing I hate about ATS?


Posters who are overly skeptical and/or religious.



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:48 PM
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10 years, I’ve been waiting for 10 damned years for my master to shut..errr..show up. I have walked many lands in this world of ours with many people of many faiths and many levels of enlightenment, and have yet to find the ONE that can answer why my all time top 10 conpsiracies are in fact even conspiracies at all.

Please answer the question contained within the 10 conspiracies if you would be so kind as to. This shall prove once and for all if you are indeed all knowing or just on summer break between 8th and 9th grades.

10. Have you ever seen Bob Lazar and Simon Grey in the same room at the same time?

9. The late 1980’s group Anything Box released a cd called “PEACE” yet the national enquirer said the bass player may be a terrorist…..and Leif Garrett is from Venus! Is this true?

8. Why does Speedy-Mart, when open 24 hours a day, have locks on the doors…hmmmm?

7. The monkey hugging tree loving left keeps telling me that I shouldn’t fear Iran, yet this is the same side of the guberment that slaps me down everytime I try to enrich uranium next to my still out back…why?

6. For years the “MAN” has been telling us to think either “GLASS HALF FULL” or “GLASS HALF EMPTY” but the real number six conspiracy is “WHO THE HECK DRANK HALF MY STUFF?”

5. If I truly have a face only my mother could love, why did she continue to hit me with a stick while growing up?

4. Does Bill Gates know where in the world Carmen San Diego is?

3. Why was Farmer Ted named Farmer Ted when, in fact, he was not a farmer at all?

2. Why does the media not talk about the “CTRL + ALT + DEL” feature of the bio-chips being inserted in humans by the governments of the world?

1. The number one conspiracy of all time is the refusal of humans to recognize a real conspiracy like the conspiracy of not recognizing REAL conspiracies. Will you and your stay here at ATS suffer a similar fate?

Thank you, thank you very much

The most revered Mr. Beezer! ©
Mr. Beezer©, now new and improved with a great new lemon scent!

( Edit - forgot to add - © - to my Mr Beezer© tagline )

[edit on 23-6-2006 by Mr Beezer]



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:52 PM
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hey, keen, it's the Master.

think i can bum ten bucks?



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:52 PM
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hey, keen, it's the Master.

think i can bum ten bucks til Wednesday?



posted on Jun, 23 2006 @ 12:56 PM
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O Master, I have several questions for you:

Can you explain the four motivations for assaultive behaivor and the correllary response to minimize such behavior?

What is the inter-relationship between cortisol and glucagon?

No cut and pastes please.





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