The Father's Role in Childcare

How important do you think that the father is in the grand scope of childraising? I'm not sure what triggered it, but I started looking up info about different opinions on the importance fathers have in the lives of children, and what happens to those children who come from single-parent homes with only a mother.

Part two of my question is this: Do you think that more fathers should be given custody of their children in divorce, and do you think it's fair or valid that in an overwhelming majority of cases the mother wins custody? Is a father as competent a parent as a mother, and can a father provide the love and nurturing required to have custody of the child?

Which parent is of more value to the child's development?

Ok, I know that was about twelve questions, but you get my drift of how I want this conversation to go....

Some stats: www.childrensjustice.org/stats.htm

(I present no guarantees of their validity)

So, the original question, because damnit I wanted to put up a poll:

How important is the father to a child's development?


*As important as the mother
*Essential to the proper development of the child
*Somewhat important; the child can develop more positively with a father
*Not very important to the child's development
*Not necessary at all

I think both parents are important in the raising of a child.

But realisticaly I think the mother is more important.

I mean my parents are still married but I was basicaly raised by my mom because my dad works too much. So I hardly got to spend any quality time with my father growing up. But now that im older we get along great and we talk all the time. But I still feel sad for the fact that he wasnt always there when I needed him because he works so hard.

But all in all my mother did a great job with me. So I think the mother plays a more important role. But the father is also important. Kids need to have a male role model to look up to be it father, uncle, couisin or someone. That male influence is needed I think.

Originally posted by DJDOHBOY
How important do you think that the father is in the grand scope of childraising?

I think it depends on the man. If he isn't a good role model then he is useless and his children would be better off without him around. If he actively participates in the childs life in a positive way, I think his value is PRICELESS

Surely the answer to this question depends massively on the father in question? Some fathers are essential. Some are a liability. The same goes for mothers. In each case you have to look at the people concerned before you pass judgment on their fitness to parent.

Well, as a guy who has primary responsibilty for my 3 month old (my wife travels alot with her job). I would say that I'm pretty important. I am involved with and engaged with my son and plan on doing so the rest of his life (whether he wants it or not ). I also agree with Venus that it depends on the man. My father for all intensive purposes, abandoned me at age 7, and when he was around hit me alot and drank like a fish... HE was not a good father. Hence, I am going overboard to ensure that I am not a nutter like him.

Both parents are critical. When my parents split, my dad raised me and my 3 siblings. I wouldnt have wanted it any other way. About 99.9% of it depends on the parent that the kids are raised by. Although my dad worked his a$$ off to raise us, he spent ALL of his free time with us. My dad was a great role model, taught me things to do around the house (typical motherly things) as well as doing his best to make a good man out of me.
Outside of your typical teenager trouble years, I'd say I turned out pretty good.

I think that both the mother and father are just as important to the upbringing of a child because they bring two different things to the table when raising a child. I also believe that a child is better off being brought up having both parents around rather than just one or the other. I believe that a good family life is a big key to having a well raised child. I am a single father of a 7 month old daughter and I would give anything to have had the relationship between her mother and I work out. I know that I can raise her just fine but being a male I have never been through some of the things she will experience while growing up. Which may make it more difficult for her to come to me about these things. This could also be the same as if a single mother were raising a son. So really neither parent is more important than the other and I believe that in all cases that if both parents are capable of taking care of the child then Joint custody is a must and one parent getting sole custody or primary custody is complete crap. Unless one parent is unfit.

[Edited on 22-10-2003 by JBenoit]