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What does that Sign say?Funny English!

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posted on May, 25 2006 @ 11:32 AM
What happens when English is not your mother tongue?

Here are a few of signs and notices that have been gathered by people .....

Feel free to add with pic?

The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbeaable.
(in a Bucharest hotel lobby)

Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.
(in a Leipzig elevator)

To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.
*in a Belgrade hotel elevator

Please leave your values at the front desk.
*in a Paris hotel elevator

Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.
*on the menu of a Swiss reataurant

Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11am daily.
*in a hotel in Athens

The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.
*in a Yugoslavian hotel

Not to perambulate the corridor in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.
*in an Austrian hotel catering for skiers

Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger: roasted duck let loose, beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.
*on the menu of a Polish hotel

For your convenience, we recommend courteous efficient self-service.
*in an Hong Kong supermarket

Drop your trousers here for best results.
*in a Bangkok dry cleaner's

Dresses for street walking.
*outside a Paris dress shop

Ladies have fits upstairs.
*outside a Hong Kong dress shop

Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.
*n a Rhodes Tailor shop

Could you like to ride on your own ass?
*advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand

To stop the drip, turn cock to right.
*on the faucet in a Finnish washroom

For coats made for ladies from their own skin.
*in the window of a Swedd*ish furrier

Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.
*on the box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong

Specialist in women and other diseases.
*in the office of a Roman doctor

It is forbidden to enter a womman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.
*in a Bangkok temple

Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.
*in a Tokyo bar

Ladies are suggested not to have children in the bar.
*in a Norwegian cocktail lounge

Stop: Drive Sideways.
*detour sign in Kyushi, Japan

Special today - no ice cream
*in a Swiss mountain inn

Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
*at a Budapest zoo

The manager has personally passed all the water served here.
in an Acapulco hotel

Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they're best in the long run.
*in a Tokyo shop

We take your bags and send them in all directions.
*in a Copenhagen airline ticket office

Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.
*from a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditional

Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such a thing is please not to read notis.
*in a Tokyo hotel

You are welcome to visit the cemetary where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
*in the lobby of a Moscow hotel across the Russian Orthodox monastery

It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different gender, for instance men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose.
*a sign posted in Germany's Black Forest

Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite gender in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.
*in a Zurich Hotel

Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.
*in an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist

If this is your first visit to USSR, you are welcome to it.
*on the door of a Moscow hotel room

When passender of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.
*in an Tokyo car rental firm

Here is another one....

edit///Is that considered too long of a quote?

[edit on 5/25/2006 by helen670]

posted on May, 25 2006 @ 11:43 AM
Thanks Helen! I needed a good laugh today. Those are great!

posted on May, 25 2006 @ 11:47 AM

Thanks Helen! I needed a good laugh today. Those are great!

I did too.....


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