So when does the chit-chat start? Right now!

reply to post by desert


so now we gotta blackmale lawsuit on me...

and crazy ass broads over in the drunk thread demanding i get banished to prison for...attempted murder i guess....

damn, lawsuits...attempted murder charges...when can i get a break?



[edit on 25-4-2008 by LordInfamous]

Originally posted by LordInfamous
...when can i get a break?

I sure as hell don't know, Brother Man! I ask myself that same damn question ever damn day, and I haven't got a satisfactory answer yet.

reply to post by desert


Desert, I wouldn't doubt if there was some sort of "code of ethic" about pouring boxed wine into bottles....lol....Perhaps its just implied that you don't do it...But....I do have to agree, this glass of Red is making my day! Keep 'em coming!

Ps. I don't have your thong, I gave it back. But maybe you could check in the pockets of the pool table...thats probably where you left it.

Desert...I must say BRAVO and go back and give you a star in a minute for that double nintendo of yours: male in your inbox? DAMN...that is good. My friend Joey Pots and Pans got sent to prison once and got a lot of male in his outbox. He's never been the same.

These days he's into wearing little shorts and calling himself Mary Cone? I don't get it.....

Butt seriously....LordInfamous, it would take a lot of time to explain the many nicknames I have acquired over the years. Butt, I will say this: I will explain them before the weekend is over. In the mantime, here are a few more:

Stiff Little Finger, Smelly Finger, Two Fingers, Hands, Handsome Johnny No Thumbs, Chain Link Fence, Tip, Skip Toomaloo, Cesspool Party, Tumor, Short Bus Billy, One Two Manny, Fudgy, Fudgy Brown, Fudgy Pants, Stain, Puddle, Rude Awakening, What Is That Velvet?, Hamster in A Habitrail, Refried Beans, Gassy Ass, Ass, Asshole, Grassy Knoll, Dick Hertz.....from Holden, Cha Cha, Chee Chee, Chin Factory, Wet Toga, Safety Pants, Uncle Boner, Boner, Bone Dog, Boon Dock Saint, The Saint, Taint, Grundle, Baller, Sack Religious, Ace, Ace Face, Intercourse Face, Dick, Dick Head, White Boy, White Bread, Honkey, No Jump, No Sale, You Smell That?, Bummer, Hum Doggie, Tinkle Toes, Nancy, Butt Buddy, Colon Cowboy, Bum Chum, Rump Ranger, Penis Pal, You Better Get That Looked At, Who Farted?, Not With My Dick, Hurry Up and Wait, Two Times, Two Times, Dry Fart, Popcorn Fart, Pork Chops and Apple Sauce, Mystery Meat, Creamed Corn, Corn Chowder, Dank, Vagina.....

There are just so many.......

I will get back to you all with the meaning behind all of those. Of course, there are still plenty more!!

EDIT to add: sorry, I forgot: Chubby, Pecker, Dong, Dink, Weenie, Weener, Dong, Dildo, Old Feller, Little Soldier, Mr. Mushroom Head, Best Friend, John Thomas, Cock, Wife's Best Friend, One Eyed Trouser Snake, Wanker, Wack Off, Wack Job, Hand Job, Get a Job, Stiffy, Hard On, Scrotum, Package, Hung, Knob, Crank, Ribbed For Her Pleasure, Lubed Lightning........




[edit on 25-4-2008 by Excitable_Boy]

I would like to apologize for that last post. It was very silly and I am sitting here this morning feeling some remorse, as I forgot:

Wood, Woodie, Peckerwood, Pecker, Woodie Wood Pecker, Cajones, Shaft, Crank Shaft, Willie, Slick Willie, Tool.....

Enough of the names for my penis....

Lastly: ZAPATOS!

That is one of my favorites....because I'm into shoes.

*flies into thread on a magic carpet*

sup folks?

i know you guys are all wondering how i got one of these. i'm wondering something myself. i'm wondering how does it feel knowing you have to drive a car every damn day while lorderic has the luxury of flying on a very nice magic carpet...sucks to be you guys doesn't it?


i just got back from the mall..

as soon as i walked in this lady at a cellphone store called me over...she was obviously gonna try and sell me a sprint cellphone but it didn't go to good for her...

her: hello, are you doing all right today?

me: yeah...

her: good. well, i was wondering what kind of phone you had..

me: cricket....

her: have you ever thought about buying a sprint?

me: nah...

her: why not?

me: cause i don't want no mutha sprint phone...

her: *blink* *blink*

me: *walks off*

ran into a couple of old friends out there...my town has another mall that haven't been to yet...i'm gonna have to check it out sometime soon..

well the job i mentioned earlier in this thread i didn't get to get...tomorrow i'm gonna see if i can find me something though.

i've been in the chat room a lot lately. about 2 nights ago i went in and some member (who's name i won't mention) was really trying to be a prick to me. that same night i wound up browsing the member pic thread and i saw the guy's picture...all i'll say is if i had a face that resembled a walrus, and weighed 600 pounds...i'd be a prick my damn self.

ok i'm outta here...

*gets on to carpet and flies off*

Cool, LI, cool! A magic carpet! I've ridden into here on a camel, but a magic carpet...I want one!

So Friday night, MrD and I are out walking on a desert dirt road, lit only by starlight. We've done this walk so many times, we could do it blindfolded. So all of a sudden, out of the darkness in front of us, we hear what sounds like a baby shaking its rattle 3000 rpms...a rattlesnake! We both swung around, not stopping, just turned in our tracks and ran. I ran so fast, my butt was three feet behind me trying to catch up! I could have pushed Marion Jones out of the way!

In my mind, the snake was angrily slithering after us as fast as we could run. We probably came across him/her either about to catch a rodent, or in the process of eating its rodent dinner. OTOH maybe it just saw these two huge unrecognizable heat signatures coming toward it and ran for cover. We will never, never go out again at night unless we have a flashlight on.

Yes, E_B, the double nintendos...a few years ago, MrD and I were on board the SS Lane Victory on one of their day cruises out of Los Angeles Harbor. On the return to its berth, we spotted a cargo ship, Uranus, in port. We immediately regaled ourselves with our observations as we leaned far out over the railing so as not to attract attention. "Honey, I didn't realize Uranus was so big!", "Just look at how much they can put in Uranus!" , "I wonder if anyone else onboard can see Uranus?", "Pass me the binoculars, so I can get a close up look at Uranus." etc.
I wonder what ever happened to Uranus. Maybe, E_B, I should google some images of Uranus. Maybe Uranus is sleeping with the fishes, or still plying the high seas, or stuck in the sand on some beach in India, waiting to be salvaged...

*flies into thread*

desert...my magic carpet is pretty groovy isin't it?



so you've rode a camel into here before? did he spit at you before you got on him?

damn eb...you need to be in the guiness book for the most nick names for a shlong...

i'm sick of all these f'n reality shows. i hate em.

TODAY IS the day that i land me a f'n job. i must. it's mandatory. i need to get out of this house and away from my grandma, who's a stonecold control freak...

it is now official that LordEric will be my stage name for when i make it big in the porn buisness. that became official the other night in chat.

*flies out of thread*

Originally posted by LordInfamous
it is now official that LordEric will be my stage name for when i make it big in the porn buisness. that became official the other night in chat.

I think this was the best part of the whole evening last night! And guess what guys? If LordEric makes it big in Porn - We all get Autographed DVD's!!!!!!!!!!! Isn't that awesome!?

Seriously. All the Magic Happens in Chat. Its so Magical.

Desert has a Camel, LI has a Magic Carpet....I walked in here for goodness sakes! I think I want a funky cool mode of transportation too!

Off to ATS. Be back later for some of that delicious Boxed Red Wine and the Homemade Trail Mix.

- Carrot

it is now official that LordEric will be my stage name for when i make it big in the porn buisness

You HAVE to make it big when you're in the porn biz or at least the young or not so young ladies and gentlemen have to make it big for you. I think if you make it small in the porn biz you get fired.

[edit on 28-4-2008 by Excitable_Boy]

reply to post by Excitable_Boy


ha ha..i have no worries in that department...

Hi, y'all !
Jeeves, I'll have what CA is drinking. Yes, pour it into a bottle. Looks classy. After all, this place is a classy joint.

LI, here's an interesting word: sapiential. Never saw or heard it, until I read it this weekend.
Love the carpet
Good luck with the job hunt.

MrP, do you have tornado insurance for this place? I mean, with all these terrible tornadoes lately, what if one came through here, and we had to rebuild in, say, the Health & Wellness forum thread. We'ld probably have to give up our and .

desert that word is indeed interesting. looked it up. i didn't expect it to mean what it meant..

got me a copy of gta 4 today...it's f'n killer...

hey carrot i think it's safe to say that i lost lol...oh well

gonna get me a haircut tomorrow...my hair's gettin nappy...lol

had me some tacos for lunch today..i devoured them.

well i'm fixin to play gta 4...later...

I think we need to have Burger Day around here.
ooh ooh burger !
Just a quick shot and then back to work. Ouzo on the rocks, please, Jeeves.

I'll leave this note for LI..."Yes, that was my reaction to that word also lol Here's another one: heuristic."

Yankees aren't playing tonight. I have nothing to watch on TV.

Originally posted by enjoies05
Yankees aren't playing tonight.

That's a good thing.....they can't lose now.

reply to post by MrPenny


Tell me about it.

So i just finished dying the wife's hair. Ladies....do you like that? I find little things like that to be intimate!

Okay: it's time for the First Annual Lounge Noir Rap Contest.....I will start:

My Barbara has a nice cranium
It looks like a geranium
Made out of titanium

Her face 'aight too
She outta sight my boo
Sep when she say boo hoo

She like Dancin' wit The Stars
Drivin' in fancy cars
Sippin' cocktails in the bars

Bar Barbara
Bar Barbara
Bar Barbara


...I;m tired. That's all I have.

[edit on 5-5-2008 by Excitable_Boy]

Yeah Rap, Rap da..........silly ya silly

Looky Looky
peeps sittin on dey butts
elbows on da bar
playin wit der nutts

drinkin up dey hooch
swiggin down dey brew
mighty rightius honkeys
whitey ricey crew

uh huh, uh huh
pull me finger
pull me little string
turn up Jimi Hendrix
play dat little wing

beatnik on de flow
Hippy out da back
pappy got de wegie
cotton in de crack

dis rappin maka da kid thirsty
Barkeep can I get some kind of green spritzer drink over here
and one of those little umbrella's too....

I hope LordInfo don't think I'm mockin his music and come over
and beat the snot out of me!!!


hey! hey!! yeah you! Who you callin a Yankee!!










[edit on 5-5-2008 by whaaa]

Yo, Whaaa! That's some great stuff! About us, huh? :w:

Mrs E_B is lucky! Here's what MrD and I find intimate...

Take a razer to my legs
Gonna shave 'em slick
With stubble like pegs
Gotta do this quick

My man likes to help
Rubs the shave cream on
Makes me wanna yelp
As it turns me on

Keep shaving
Keep, keep shaving
Keep shaving, Baby
Oooooooooo that's nice

Don't know where to stop
Shave every little part
Now I'm flying non-stop
Baby, you got my heart

Keep shaving
Keep, keep shaving
Keep shaving, Baby
Oooooooooo that's nice