posted on Dec, 2 2013 @ 10:37 AM
Good morning, all! Jeeves, strong coffee, please, and top it with that delicious peppermint whipped cream.
Glad to see everyone who showed up Thursday night. We all had our usual great time, and this time I thought I would get pictures to prove it. For some
reason ya'll took turns sitting on MrP's lap, but the photos I took of you ended up selfies unfortunately. Maybe if MrP would dress up as Santa for
this year's LN party, I can get photos of you on his lap this time. And, Mrp, it would be nice if you had gifts for us. You wouldn't have to spend a
lot of money; the smaller size bottles of liquor would do.
Speaking of gifts, I had an odd thing happen the other day. Holiday packages are starting to be delivered I noticed, but there's a twist this year. I
was out on the porch sweeping away the leaves, when I noticed a drone about to deliver a package on my driveway. I walked up to it just as it was
about a foot off the ground, and I noticed that the package was for my neighbor. I used my broom to gently brush the drone in the direction of next
It gently returned to the spot on the driveway. I pushed it harder, it still came back. I swatted at it, but it still came back. Ok, by now I was
starting to get angry; no machine was going to get the better of me! I grabbed the can of wasp spray and shot the stream directly at it. For a split
second it seemed to stop its hover, but it quickly recovered and began its descent.
I then grabbed the garden hose and applied the force of maximum water pressure. It wobbled, like a dog shaking off water, and the next thing I know,
I'm hit with a laser beam in my face. That damned thing is trying to blind me!
I was furious now, ready to do battle, so with broom in hand raised to the sky, I chased that thing around the front yard. I got in a few good whacks
but was quickly tiring in the face of the drone's evasive maneuvering. Then I thought, "Butterfly, what is the best way to outwit that unthinking
I leaped into the bushes and waited. As soon as that thing was just about to place the box down, I swung the broom smack dab over its top, preventing
it from flying away. In a flash, I was now the one hovering. I dropped the broom and grabbed that thing like I was noodling a 40 pound salmon. "Drop
the box now!", I yelled. It meekly complied.
I held that drone close, screaming at it, "I'm gonna terminate your ass, you dumb piece of metal!" Then I heard sad beeps and squeals emanating
from its electronics. Oh, no, how could I be so cruel as to consign this robot to my pile of ewaste?
Hey, I thought, you would make the perfect Christmas gift for MrD! So I carried it into the house, to the downstairs closet. I know MrD can reprogram
that thing's programs. We can have fun with it out in the desert. Once he fixes the faulty delivery program, I'll bring it here to carry drinks from
the bar to our tables for us. And, Spira, we can have it deliver our sherry to the veranda for us!
Well, I gotta go. Got a little holiday travel coming up, so I gotta pack.