posted on Oct, 24 2002 @ 03:44 PM
A Major Research Institution has recently annouced the discovery of the heaviest chemical element known to to science. The New Element has been
tentatively named "Governmentium". Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 11 assistant deputy neutrons giving
it a atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particals are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particals called peons.
Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A
minute amount of Governmentium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it would normaly take less then a second.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 3 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant
neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In Fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization causes some
morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This Characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in
concentration. This Hypothetical quantity is refured to as "Critical Morass". You will know it when you see it.