posted on Aug, 20 2006 @ 02:24 AM
I'd rather not get into posting the symbol here, as I keep it to myself. I had been at that time, for a few days pouring over old reports
and interviews I had done with others over a 10-13 year period, and rather then go into deep detail of what someone saw, how they saw it, etc..I tried
a different approach. I tried looking at the only thing left to study, the people themselves.
What had sightings or experiences done to them personally. What had been their outlook on certain things beforehand, and then after, the event. Had
their spiritual views been altered or influenced. Were their relationships changed, better or ended due to the experience?
After all, the study of UFOs isnt a study of UFOs at all, but reports...by people. And thats an important issue to face. What I saw in those reports
and even making some follow up calls was that people by in large were changed by the event, some much more then others.
For example, one man was a Pastor at a church north of me. He and his son had a sighting of 2 structured vehicles in 1998, near their home by a barn.
He vehemently insisted that these things were "not of earth". He also had the feeling that night, that something happened to him, while alone in the
basement, 2 hours after the sighting. But he didnt know what.
By 2000, he was divorced, working as a restaurant manager, and believed without question that there was no God, and that we'd been seeded here by
aliens from another planet. His wife left him due to this belief.
Another one was an elderly couple, together for over 40 years. She had a significant sighting and experience in VA, while out with her Daughter one
night 1997. The daughter recalls nothing. The elderly lady recalled everything, without the regression crap.
By 2000, her husband had left her as she'd literally become consumed by her search for what happened to her, and who the "people" were she saw walk
out from a light directly in front of her daughters car. She was out every night looking for UFOs, and nothing stopped her, not the grandkids...not
even Thanksgiving or Christmas. She died as a result of complications from diabetes that summer.
This is only 2. There's alot more. But after awhile they seem to fit together, in their simialarities. Obsession, torment, loss, and a search that
never yielded anything they wanted, but only posed more questions.
I had been in that boat before. No answers, just more questions. You try to integrate the experience into your life, but it never seems to fit like it
should. There's no place for it.
But it's got a place for you. Bet on it.
I came to a realization, that it's a dangling carrot. You'll never get the carrot. Thats not what it's about, it's about the things you do, and
the lengths you'll go to find out.
Thats what hit me.
The consuming of spirituality, beliefs, relationships, sometimes your ability to go out after dark, your ability to function like a normal individual.
I'll give you 10 guesses what you'll get for giving up or changing those things to meet the challenge of the phenomena in return.
There is no answer. It's the question. You'll relinquish your relationships, friends, family, your religion (whatever it is) money, and time to this
endeavor because you just know there's something at the end of it.
What does all that sound like to you?
(thats not rhetorical, give me your heartfelt answer)
I know what it sounded like to me. And it made me physically sick.
One of the most frequent things "said" to me by "them" was this:
"Are you sure?"
And that echoed in my head. I could literally taste my own self doubt.
Now, I'm slated for a lecture in DC that weekend to talk about my experiences, and it's one of maybe 2 I've done on that, at that time. Most of
them that I did were on sighting photo analysis or film, etc. I was nervous enough having to talk to a huge group, now this.
So Jill, and myself along with a couple who knew all about me and my experiences, and in fact the man was one who had a sighting with me...a pretty
dramatic one, came over one night about a day or so later. We had our bedroom door shut and locked because the room was a disaster at the time and we
didnt want company seeing it.
I discussed with Jill and the couple what I'd found, and they saw how frought I was with saying the entire thing was...lets say, "highly-negative"
in nature, at this lecture.
They left at 3 am and Jill and I went to bed. The next morning as we went to leave the house Jill asked me if someone else had come by after the
couple left. I said no, but found it odd that I had that feeling too.
"It felt like some people came to talk to you, just you, not me. It was quick though." she said. "I dont know why I feel like that...just that
feeling that someone else came by."
We blew it off and went to leave. I'd forgotten my hat or keys or something, and went back to the bedroom to get it. As I looked in the mirror I saw
the symbol drawn on it. Jill had not seen it, nor had I. The couple the night before didnt do it, as they had no access, Jill didnt do it (and swears
to this day), and I sure as hell know I didnt.
When I showed it to Dr. P, he said what I mentioned in the prior post. But to describe it further, he said it was called "angelic writing". And, he
said, it was an urgent tone.
"It's a challenge of sorts..." he said.
"I dont get it, challenge to what?" I replied, cutting him off.
"I assume to you, your mirror right?" he laughed.
"Right" I said.
"It essentially says, 'Now you know, do you have the courage to stand up for what you believe?', does that have bearing to you?
I nearly fell over, I remember the top of my head pounding like I'd been smacked.
"Holy sh&*t." I said.
Dr. P was clueless about my dilemma, but there was no mistaking the challenge, nor what it meant, nor it's perfect timing.
The next weekend I gave my lecture at DC, and gave my answer to whoever wrote that symbol on my mirror.