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Gentlemen, this could save your life

page: 1

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posted on Nov, 18 2005 @ 11:02 AM
Received this as an email today.


The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or significant other!

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Wow, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
SAFEST: Here's my paycheck.
ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't over-do it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
ULTRA SAFE: Have some more chocolate.

* * * * * * * * * *
13 Things PMS Stands For

1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff

And my favorite one . . .
13. Potential Murder Suspect

Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and those who might
need a laugh or men who need a warning!

posted on Nov, 18 2005 @ 02:33 PM
I just read this to my wife thinking that it was funny.
I guess I havn't been paying attention to the calendar because
I should have just offered her some chocolate.

(some people -- women -- just don't get humor)

posted on Nov, 26 2005 @ 01:39 PM
Hey! Watch it, bt
.....I thought it was hysterical!!

Especially #1 on the list of 13!!

posted on Nov, 26 2005 @ 10:43 PM
Fantastic. I'm so glad I'm single. Must remember to show that to every feminist I know... and be prepared to duck!


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