Hello, everyone!

Greetings, comrades!

I'm just dropping by here to give a quick hello, this being the new member introductions and all, and look forward to contributing to this great site. Instead of boring you with gratuitous praise, however, I think I'll just tell a joke:

A drunk man is staggering down the street late at night when he bumps into this really grotesque looking woman. She shrieks in disgust and says,
"You're the drunkenest man I've ever seen!"
The man looks up at her for a second before slurring back,
"Yeah? Well, you're the ugliest lady I've ever seen, and that's worse, because when I wake up tomorrow, I'm going to be sober!"

(Rimshot)

Welcome to ATS, funny joke lol! Well good to have you here and ill see you about the board,

If you feel you have any questions visit my thread
Hey new members!! Come here if you need advice

Below is A hand book of links that may help you answer some questions you have, ie, what are points ect....this is Zedds great link book for ATS use
www.abovetopsecret.com...

If you have any questions feel free to u2u me

You will find your u2u's in the member center



and also there is a message when you recieve a u2u



also need help getting your avatar up (or pic in your profile) check out this link
Avatar, Pic in profile help

Want to post a pic in your thread.
how to post a pic on a thread

want to change your password to something you remember? look for this tab at the top of the page, there you can edit your profile and password

Welcome to ATS, Sagittarius.

Enjoy the site!

Glad you could make it, come on in and sit a spell…

Welcome to ATS,ATSNN,BTS,PTS, and Ignorance Denied.

A great way to get off to an even better start at ATS:

Zedd's Handbook of ATS Links

Other helpful links for new (and old ) members:

Asala’s New Member Advice Thread

Answers to Questions not in the FAQ

Searching and Complaining

ATS Search for “Dummies”

Member's and ATS, L.L.C. Shared Rights

Forgot to vote? Voted and still not happy? Voted and are happy, yet unhappy that others are not sharing your joy:

PTS Is Wide Open For Business

Not sure about starting a new thread? Check out what one of our "Esteemed Senior Staffers" thinks you should do. (P.S. He's right!)

If you have any questions, or need any help, U2U myself or any Staff Member, or use the Gripe/Idea Button.



Greetings Monkeys, not just for saying "Hi" anymore...

welcome!!! i'm new but not really...just returned. it can be a fun crazy place round here. by the way......Mirthful Me is my new favorite mod and needs to adopt me!

Hey, welcome back....

Here is a hand book of links that may help you answer some questions you have about stuff on ATS

If you have any questions feel free to u2u me, or any other staff member. After you have made 20 posts, you can u2u with all members.

Also, for avatar info, here are kinglizard's avatar instructions and a reminder to all ATS members.
And, for help to make those images fit and keep those links from gong on forever, please see thisImage Size Guidelines

Also, here's a great link to help you organize your favorite forums. It will also keep threads you post in as favorites: www.abovetopsecret.com...
This link is also up at the top as MyATS

And, don't forget to check out PTS and BTS. You can log in to these other two forums with your ATS login information.

Also, there is Ignorance Denied, which requires a separate login.

Have a good time here

And,
Welcome to ATS