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The Survival Monkey Conspiracy

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posted on Sep, 26 2005 @ 08:17 PM
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Oh how low will mankind stoop? In a flash of brilliance, it occured to me that what the world needed in this time of global catastrophe's and joyless existence --- survival monkeys.

If President Bush had an veritable army of Survival Monkeys hidden in specially designed camps in Wyoming and Montana, the aftermath of Katrina and Rita would have been entirely different. Bush would have been a hero for his foresight in having American scientists genetically engineer the Survival Monkey.

Sporting bright orange jumpsuits, government surplus Club Gitmo wear, the Survival Monkey would be instantly recognizable as a true friend of Mankind. The Survival Monkey is trained at life saving and even at performing mouth to (ewwww) mouth resessitation. He can clambor to roof tops and even swim through the most dangerous waters bringing aid and, more importantly, hope and joy for those who just need to see a monkey now and then....heck everyone loves monkeys.

But this thread is about a serious breech of security on BTS.....my original thread was usurped!!!!! Stolen. Who could have taken it and, more importantly why? This is a genuine conspiracy within a conspiracy site....the irony is, well, ironic. But what can be done when a thread is stolen right out from someone because of obvious intellectual jealousy and avarice?




posted on Sep, 26 2005 @ 08:23 PM
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According to the timestamp, you were simply beaten to it.
Either that, or there's a hole in my foil beanie, and the thought control waves are just making me think that... In either case, no conspiracy here...so slapping on the everlast....



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