Do NOT presume to tell me what is best for MY body.

I just finished a conversation with a chap online who I've known for a few months.

He told me that I was a fool for having a particular surgery; moreover, I was "obviously taken in like a sheep" and didn't know any better. According to this wise sage, I should have ignored the advice of three physicians, two women's advocacy groups and three endrocrinologists. I should have tried herbal treatments, you see. According to this sage, "herbs would have probably cured you".

Listen.

I had a disease called adenomyosis. There is really no cure for a severe case of adenomyosis. If you're lucky, it's asymptomatic. If you're not, it can make your life a living hell. It can make you wake up in such pain that you really cannot think straight. It can cause you so much agony that Percocet only just manages to take the edge off of the stabbing discomfort. It can ruin your sex life, it can make you unfit to work, and it can really make your life a misery.

I tried Lupron (a gonadotropin releasing agent, and used in conjunction with Aygestin to make life less hellish for my then-husband) for three cycles of treatment, and I had laparoscopic surgery to see if anything could be done that way. Nothing worked. Nothing. We tried. Oh, how we tried.

At the age of 28, I underwent a supracervical hysterectomy.

This was absolutely and utterly the last resort; after living on painkillers and hormones my quality of life was just...well, "terrible" doesn't quite touch on it.

And yet here you come, with your misinformed judgemental twaddle, telling me I was "a sucker" for "letting them take away" my womb? Please.

Unless you've been in this position - you seriously should consider sitting down, swallowing the urge to "share", and STFU.

Seriously.

Because you - particularly because you're MALE - will never, ever know what it's like to be told you have such a condition, and moreover, to be told at 28 that you will never, ever bear a child. Thankfully, you'll never understand what it's like to have to tell a potential partner that he'll never be able to have a biological child with you.

Take your little packet of herbal goodness and shove it where you will - and you should be bloody thankful for this - never suffer from adenomyosis.

This was a vent session. Aimed at someone who never reads these boards, and nobody who actually does read these boards. Thanks

[edit on 13-8-2005 by Tinkleflower]

WOW, I am sooooooo sorry Tinkleflower! I know I don't want any children right now (I'm 24); but to have the ability to have them taken away, I would be very sad. I am really truly sorry! I do sympathize with you on the annoyance of people thinging that they know whats best for you. Only you know whats best for yourself. Anybody who says differently is either lying, selling something, or stuck on themselves. I'd tell that person to go take a long walk off a short peer if it were me, but that's just me. I am really sorry though....

Thankyou for your kindness, sinta

I'm more or less at peace with the whole child-bearing issue (knowing that being a parent involves more than biologically contributing); but I just got so frustrated at this person. He seemed to be thinking with the wrong head

Thankyou, once more, for your kind, kind words.

Wow. Well I'm glad that at least nothing went wrong with the operation. Sure you won't be able to have kids, but at least you're alive and well.