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(STBSS) Ted

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posted on Jul, 17 2005 @ 06:23 PM
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This is no where near complete, but I got to going on it and I wanted to post what I have. I don't know if I can compete with all you writers out there but let me know how it is. I'm still not sure where it's going but it's kind of writing itself
Only took me a couple of minutes to do this. Feel free to give me some feedback!

Here it is:

Ted was lying in his favorite hammock when the first drops of dew began forming on the long blades of grass in his mother's back yard. The hot, humid days and cool nights brought unusually heavy dew characteristic of late summer in east central Iowa. He mused at the idea of going to the pool around noon, but wanted to spend his last day at his mother’s with his mom, after all, he only got to see her three times a year. Not to mention his father would be flying in, from southern Illinois, to pick him up at quarter-to-four which left very little time to spare if he was going to mow the lawn like his mother had asked him to do three days ago. He just felt lazy, without purpose… like nothing.
Ted often pondered his reason for being on earth, the reason he was here. His purpose, it seemed, at the ripe old age of nine, would be hidden from him forever. Unless, of course, his purpose was the lights.
After his parents had divorced two years ago he had been thrown, like many children, from catching toads and camping out in the backyard on days like today to living in hotels with his dad after his mother had kicked him out, his dad still swears to this day that he did not cheat on Ted’s mother, but she’d hear nothing of it. It was a messy divorce, but at least his mom had his best interest in mind, she knew that without a job she could not support the boy, so she gave custody of Ted to his father, and for that Ted was partially grateful to her for. He was not, however, grateful of the fact she brushed off lights like they didn’t even exist! And she always scolded him when he came back from playing with bruises and pencil eraser sized wounds on his back and his legs.

[edit on 7/17/2005 by BigWyrm]




posted on Jul, 19 2005 @ 07:46 AM
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It looks like you have a potentially good story in the making. Life through a 9 year old's eyes can be a nice point of view. It would be good to be that innocent again.



posted on Jul, 24 2005 @ 10:25 PM
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This story has potential. I can't wait to read more.



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