The History of the Weed Gods

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posted on Jul, 5 2005 @ 12:32 PM
Okay well, this is my first story as a writer! I hope you guys enjoy it. Also, if any mods think that the subject matter is inappropriate (from my interpretation it doesn't violate any rules, but I may be wrong) then please don't remove my writer status, just delete this.

The History Of The Weed Gods

In the beginning the cosmos was a vast empty space filled with pure THC. Then the THC began to be drawn together adding to its power and becoming spherical. These spheres where at first very many. Then the spheres began to come together. The many spheres then became few, and finally, one.

It was tremendously huge, and its light was bright enough to fill all the rest of the empty space with a pure green glow. Some spots here and there darkened. So it was not pure. But it’s taints where small, and made little impact on the One Great Sphere.

And then, incredibly the sphere shrank and became smaller. It’s once vast size withdrew. But this sphere was just as powerful as the One Great Sphere for all that THC was compacted into a small area. It was solid.
It was in this solid ball that the first conciseness emerged. It was called “Marijunana”, but obviously it was very advanced as we can’t fathom how to pronounce it. And so people today call him The First. The First started by asking itself the basic questions of life. “Who am I?”, and “What am I doing here?”

The First could not answerer these questions and so it drew within itself and split in half becoming two. This second was half of the first. It was still very strong, but half as strong as The First, who now due to the split was also half as strong.

The First then asked the Second. “Hello, do you know who I am, and why we are here?” The second replied,
“I know only that you are The First and that I must be the Second. I do not know why we are here.”
“Then perhaps we should make more of us so we can think of why we are here.”
And so, the Weed Gods began to separate and create more of themselves. It was all well, they began to create and experiment with there powers.
So the Weed Gods of 4 created the stars and other great things. The stars lit up the sky so the Weed Gods could see. And the nebulae where made to manufacture more stars when the old ones died.
And life was good, but eventually the Weed Gods became tired of each other and so the four became eight. Each of the four new Gods had something to add to the universe.

The Fifth made Time, so the Gods could tell how old they where.

The Sixth made all of the senses, but the Gods made little use of them.

The Seventh made the planets, so the universe was more interesting.

The Eighth made the Oceans on the planets, so the planets where more

Life was great for the eight Weed Gods. They had much more to talk about and much more to plan for the future. However not was all perfect. Some of the Gods wanted to create an infinite amount of themselves so that their creativity would be unmatched, for every little fragment of themselves would be its own little god. The other side thought they should make no more Gods, so that where power was concentrated and that they could commit great works of creativity alone.
So they split into two groups. The side that wanted to multiply was called “Life,” and the side that wanted to stay supreme called themselves the Weed Gods.

Life went down to all the planets. Each one received a small amount of the original four. They began to multiply through various means. Some used Xenagons, others DNA. All of the new species where unique. Life had one thing on common, each plant was filled with THC. It created Animals, and Insects, and much more. It was perfect, and everything worked in sync.
It was simply too perfect for the remaining Weed Gods. They grew bored in watching planets fill with life, then die when their planet and sun grew cold. So the Gods thought of a wonderful and terrible idea. What if they could reach into themselves and manifest their own imperfections?
Those dark spots on The One Great Sphere. If they could introduce suffering and… Evil into the world then things would be much more interesting due to the chance that things could crash down and fail. And so the element of Chaos was introduced into the world.

At first it started out by giving the existing species a sense of individuality and self. These where called the Dinosaurs, and while they weren’t exactly brilliant, they quickly became aware of who and what they where. They became enraged that they could be made simply for the amusement of a greater power, and so they rebelled. First they coated themselves in white, and then they launched attack after attack on the THC around them. Much burned.
Chaos knew it had failed, this was not the plan. So it sent a great ball of flame to the earth. When it stuck earth almost all Life was destroyed. This shocked and horrified the Weed Gods, they created Chaos to liven things up, not destroy everything. But not all of life was destroyed, some of it had somehow survived. And what life was left multiplied and resumed what it normally did, replicate.
Now that the world was repopulated Chaos could start anew. He found a small ape-like animal, and decided it would be his new creation. So he gave them self-awareness as well. And, the greatest of all changes that he made was that he removed the THC from all the plants in the world and placed it into one new plant, the Cannabis plant.

The rest was history. For now the humans would fight amongst themselves and create technology that the weed gods could enjoy, and then humans would also send sacrifices of burning Cannabis to please them. At this, the Weed Gods where happy.

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