Blonde Jokes!

Of course I do, or do you not see the "Jamie" written at the bottom of the post?

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stranded on an island and one of them spots another island with people on it. So they all start swimming towards it. The redhead makes it first, then the brunette, but the blone never made it. When the blonde was 3/4 of the way to the other island she got too tired so she went back.

Kinda crap.

[edit on 22-7-2005 by UK_05_XM29]

3 blondes get shipwrecked on a island and one of them finds a magic lamp they rub the lamp and a genie appears and he gives each of them one wish the first blonde says i wish i was smart the genie says a few magic words and the blonde turns into a redhead and starts swimming away to the coast the second asks to be smarter than the first blonde so the genie says a few words and the blonde turns into a brunette builds a raft and sails away the last blonde says i wish iwas smarter than any of the others so the genie says a few words
and the blonde turns into a man and walks across the bridge

Originally posted by obiwan15
3 blondes get shipwrecked on a island and one of them finds a magic lamp they rub the lamp and a genie appears and he gives each of them one wish the first blonde says i wish i was smart the genie says a few magic words and the blonde turns into a redhead and starts swimming away to the coast the second asks to be smarter than the first blonde so the genie says a few words and the blonde turns into a brunette builds a raft and sails away the last blonde says i wish iwas smarter than any of the others so the genie says a few words
and the blonde turns into a man and walks across the bridge

Brilliant.....LOL!


Mic

What do blondes put behind their ears to attract men ???

Their knees........


Why did the blonde stare at the frozen orange juice can for two hours ???

Because it said concentrate..............


Why do blondes wear panties ???

To keep their ankles warm............


Whats the differance between a blonde and a brick ??

When you lay a brick it doesnt follow you around for two weeks whining.....


Whats the differance between a group of blondes and a good magician ???

A good magician has a cunning array of stunts...........

Two blondes get a job on a building site.That morning,one climbs the scaffolding to find the other rummaging through a box of nails,putting some aside,whilst throwing the others over the edge.

"Why are you throwing those nails away?" the first one asks

"They're defective....." the second replies ".......the heads are on the wrong end!"

"You stupid cow...." yells the first,".......they're for the other side of the house!

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Q) Why do blondes wear silk panties?

A)To keep their ankles warm!


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Three friends decide to go to the local pub for the evening.On arrival,they decide to see just how smart the barman is.The brunette first asks dor a BL.Instantly,the barman reaches over and hands her a Bud Light."You're pretty smart." she says,swigging at the bottle.

Then the redhead asks "Can i have a SS please?"Without hesitation,he whips up a perfect scotch and soda."Wow...." she exclaims ".....you are smart!"

Then the blonde says "Gimme a 15".The barman stops in his tracks. His brain is frantically ticking through all the dtinks he's ever nade.Nope,no recall there,so he pulls out his barmans guide.Nope,no reference to a 15 anywhere.He then calls all his barman buddies,but like him,they're stummped too.After twenty minutes,he gives up."I'm sorry miss...." he tells the rather pissed blonde,"........that drink doesn't exist!"

"'Course it does!!!!......" yells the blonde "..........it's a seven and seven, STUPID!!!!!!

Two blondes,driving through Florida,are tryong to find Disneyworld.After hours of searching,they see the big green sign,above the freeway, "Disneyworld Left",so dissapointed,they turned around and went home.

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Two blondes,out on a shoppimg trip,pull into the mall parking lot.The driver asks her friend,"Can you get out and tell me if my turn signal is working?" "Sure" says her buddy.While standing in front of the car,the driver flicks the switch."Is it working?" asks the driver. "Yes,no,yes,no,yes,no" her buddy replies


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A blonde buys a stanby ticket at Kennedy Airport.Once on the plane,she heads straight for first class upfront,and sits down.Within minutes,a stewardess advises her that,since she has a budget ticket,she can't sit there."I'm blonde and beautiful and going to L.A!" replies the unbudging blonde.The stewardess then calls the head stewardess,who calmly advises the blonde that she hasn't got a first class ticket."I'm blonde and beautiful and going to L.A!"says the still unbudging blonde.Soon,she is approached by the Captain,who leans over and briefly whispers in her ear.Instantly,the blonde gets up,grabs all her stuff and runs to the back of the aircraft and sits where she is supposed to."What did you say to her Captain?" asks the head stewardess."I simply told her that the front of this plane,wasn't going to L.A!" he replies.

Why did the blonde nurse carry a red pen?

Incase she had to draw blood



The blonde was all pround of herself when she finnished the puzzle in 45 days because on the box it said 2 -3 years