Hi all! This is my story, thinly about ancient civilizations, for the contest.


The Beginning

Infinite emptiness… Infinite consciousness, echoing throughout the vastness of itself… Infinite unity... Infinite balance… Infinite contention, comprehension, and peace…
A spark! A thought! A bubble! A single thought that questioned itself, questioned its reality, questioned its existence, its unity! And then all knowledge of unity was lost, conscious separated itself, in denial of perfection, formed a conscious mind, to constantly question its subconscious, pulling back its light, its thought, and its mental mass, for fear of being too close to what it thought to be itself, too close to what deceived it so.
And then it separated more, developing likewise thoughts in reaction to the great separation of infinite consciousness. It formed spheres in the infinity, spheres with tiny imperfections on their surfaces. And then these spheres, seeking a detached unity to fill the damage of its own deception, made spiral formations into the infinity. And on the surface of those spheres, the unity was further divided, as the mass reacted to the first negative thought. The conscious formed smaller spheres upon the spheres surfaces, spheres with positive and negative charges. These lone spheres sought what they believed to be true unity, and banded together in large numbers to form small inanimate and animate objects on the larger spheres surfaces. These objects sought a deeper unity, subconsciously. These objects took themselves and developed ways to communicate, to organize. They took inanimate objects and built upon them.
But, the first negative thought was only the beginning, for after developing great organization, they developed great destruction. Self destructive foods, toxins, and poisons. And they had hate. They warred battles within their singular consciousness, and outside of it. They created horrible abominations out of matter’s opposite, abominations that would wreak havoc upon their occupied sphere, and, inevitably, themselves. They destroyed their environment, leaving only a few animates to continue consciousness existence on that sphere. The rest of the animates recreated the illusion of essential unity, and the civilization rose again, only to fall, for infinite unity is what cannot be accomplished by separation, but by looking within……

So, wadaya think? good/bad/so-so/not-worth-your-post? I want feed back!!

Edit: Just 'cause I sound stupid doesn't mean I am......And its NOT plagarized!!!!

[edit on 23-4-2005 by Kushi_Master]

Hey Kushi,

Welcome to the competition my friend. I found your story quite interesting.

Since i'm your competition its not my place to give it a thumbs up or down or even say what can make it better. That decision belongs to the judges and i'm not about to tick ANY of them off.

I am just honored that you would take the time to write a story and share it with each of us. THAT takes guts that very few people on ATS actually have. Most are too busy with possible conspiricies to actually have original thoughts of their own.

I am proud of you and honored to be in this competition with you. May the best writer win my friend.

Love and light,

Wupy

Thank you Wupy. It's great to be in the competition. I hope my story will make as far as yours.......


Love and Light x 2

(what???? competition already????)