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Why Jesus is a woman

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posted on Apr, 22 2005 @ 09:43 PM
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There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:
1. He called everyone "brother."
2. He liked Gospel.
3. He couldn't get a fair trial.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into His Father's business.
2. He lived at home until he was 33.
3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother was sure He was God.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian:
1. He talked with His hands.
2. He had wine with His meals.
3. He used olive oil.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian:
1. He never cut His hair.
2. He walked around barefoot all the time.
3. He started a new religion.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was an American Indian:
1. He was at peace with nature.
2. He ate a lot of fish.
3. He talked about the Great Spirit.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments the Jesus was Irish:
1. He never got married.
2. He was always telling stories.
3. He loved green pastures.

But the most compelling evidence of all - 3 proofs that Jesus was a woman:
1. He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was no food.
2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it.
3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was work to do.




posted on Apr, 22 2005 @ 11:02 PM
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Nice post...I came here thinking this would be a serious and heavy posting....I was pleasantly surprised. Made me chuckle...Thanks!



posted on Apr, 22 2005 @ 11:08 PM
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Whew! Didn't notice the forum this was in, and have seen wackier theories thrown out there seriously. So here's a little insight to the JJ's mind when reading subjects that are...out there, and he want's to read through them:

JJ's inner monologue:
"I wonder if anyone will know Homestar Runner was named after >deleted for trivia's sake<
New Posts
Jesus Was a Woman
Why Jesus Was a Woman
...
Oh man, I can't wait to hear this one"
Chuckled aloud, and clicked on the link.

You're welcome for that!



posted on Apr, 22 2005 @ 11:22 PM
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Originally posted by cafeman
Nice post...I came here thinking this would be a serious and heavy posting....I was pleasantly surprised. Made me chuckle...Thanks!


Laughter is the best medicine. I'm glad I made you chuckle.



posted on Apr, 22 2005 @ 11:24 PM
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Originally posted by junglejake
Whew! Didn't notice the forum this was in, and have seen wackier theories thrown out there seriously. So here's a little insight to the JJ's mind when reading subjects that are...out there, and he want's to read through them:

JJ's inner monologue:
"I wonder if anyone will know Homestar Runner was named after >deleted for trivia's sake<
New Posts
Jesus Was a Woman
Why Jesus Was a Woman
...
Oh man, I can't wait to hear this one"
Chuckled aloud, and clicked on the link.

You're welcome for that!


April Fools? Oh wait it's almost May now. Ok, ummm happy early May Day? Glad I could make you smile.



posted on Apr, 26 2005 @ 11:58 AM
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serious note: Mary did not stay a virgin, how can you explain all the real and spirtual brothers he had?

Not serious note:
What were Jesus' first words while on the cross? I can see my house from here

Jesus walks into an inn, puts three nails on the desk and says "Can you put me up for the night?"





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