posted on Oct, 31 2010 @ 07:09 PM
THIS is why America is the most hated nation on the planet. They think the world is there's for the taking, and that if they want it, they can just
walk in and take it. They also seem to think they're all a bunch of incredible war heroes, when really they couldn't even defeat Vietnam, a bunch of
Asians hiding in the bushes, got their ass kicked out of there, and then say "WE WON CUZ WE RETREATED." WTF? The Americans may have a ton of bombs,
equipment, and troops, but you are the most idiotic person alive to think that they can take Canada. Why? Let me list some reasons...
1. Well... somebody said they would rather live as Americans than die as Canadians. # you. I would much rather die a Canadian than as an American
(hey! your country just hit 85% of all people obese. congradulations, your the fattest nation on the face of the Earth), and even if I couldn't fight
as an actual soldier, I would grab a gun and shoot anything that moves. Sorry, but they deserve it if they think they have the right to invade their
greatest ally. I don't know anyone who would give in, and by the way, most Canadian farmers are taught to shoot at the age of 6. Any farmer worth his
weight can shoot a gopher in the eye from at the very LEAST 50 yards away, no scope, with a 22 cal. By the way, remember what happened last time you
tried to invade us? Epic fail. Same as Vietnam, and Iraq by the looks of it. And what did you gain from it? Your White House burnt to the ground... it
was grey at the time though.
2. Canadian soldiers are some of the best, if not THE best trained soldiers in the world. Need an example? Vimy Ridge. The Brits tried to attack it,
fail. The French tried to attack it, fail. The AMERICANS tried to attack it, fail. The Canadians marched in and took it in 3 days. Need another
example? Heres one: have you ever won war games against us? Sure as hell doesn't seem like it...
3. You think our allies are going to watch you march in here and start killing everybody? IDIOTS. Lets see who you'll be fighting... The British
Commonwealth (Britain, India, Australia, New Zealand, South Africa, to name a FEW), everyone else in NATO and the UN (NATO is what, 26 countries if I
remember correctly?. Russia will probably come, god knows they're just waiting for an excuse to bomb your miserable country to a glass surface. China
might come, they dont particularily like you either, plus you owe them trillions. France would come, Canada is partly from French origin (Mainly
British though). Other countries might even come to help. Looks like your all outa friends, if the great and powerful U.S.A. exists after, you'll be
like a tiny Russia. "That country over there nobody likes that just seems so... damn... pointless.
4. Canada would simply cut off your resources if they knew you were about to attack. We supply you 65% of your oil, hydro, timber, and a ton of other
resources that you couldn't live without.
5. The U.S. is so economicly screwed right now they can't fund a war 1 tenth this size. You owe China trillions, and keep crawling back to Canada or
China every time you need resources or money. Here's your allowance, sonny boy, go spend it on McDonalds.
6. McDonalds. LOL. Like I said, 85% of Americans are fat, and wouldn't be able to do much good in combat.
7. The Americans that have finally woken up, and have seen the consequences of their actions that have contributed to the destruction of the world,
will retaliate, fight their own country, hide, protest, or, if they were already in the military, desert.
8. Terrorists may even join in on the fun. What better time to attack when everyone else is attacking too, and nobody will even notice when they waltz
into the country with bombs strapped to their chests, blowing up anything that looks big and important, like the White House (if the Canadians
haven't already marched back down their and let history repeat itself). Maybe if we're nice enough to stop the attack (assuming the Russians and the
Chinese will give have a #), we'll let the U.S. become its own province? What do you think, "That Place Down There", or "Crater"?
9. Basically the same as #7. Tiny Civil War's would break out all over the States, people would some would say that they deserve what they get, while
others would support the Americans in the war, and then the States would kill itself from the inside out.
10. Every countries already pissed at you for the war in Iraq, your terrible music (I'm truly sorry for unleashing Celine Dion and Justin Bieber upon
you guys though), and that McDonalds isn't making enough money making the U.S. fat, so they're spreading across the whole world like an obese
plague. Ever seen that vid where that woman left a Happy Meal on the table for 180 days (6 months)? It never even began to start going bad. WTF DO
THEY DO TO THE POOR COW? DO THEY THROW IT IN A VOLCANO AND SEE WHAT COMES BACK UP OR WHAT??? CAN YOU EVEN CALL IT FOOD OR A BIG BALL OF PROCESSED
11. Last, but CERTAINLY not least, maple syrup, canadian bacon (NO ITS NOT THE SAME AS HAM), hockey players, beer, and BEAVERS will all destroy you.
Do...not...mess...with...my...beavers. They'll chew your limbs off.
12. Your government is (I think we can both agree on this one) made up of the most idiotic people in your country. Come on, BUSH?!?!? Maybe you
didn't hear me... BUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSHHHHHH!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
^^^ Basically to sum it all up, U.S. invading Canada = Epic Fail. You may be able to beat us 1 on 1, but some people have to realise this is reality,
nobodies going to stand aside while the worlds best peacekeepers are all killed by an army of posers, saying they're the worlds police because they
"saved Europes ass" in WW1 and 2, even though the only reason they bothered to get off their asses was because they were attacked a few years after
the war began. You were SUPPLYING the Japanese, great help.
But in all truth I really do love most of you guys, and your country as a whole. I just hate the arrogant, ignorant assholes who run your government
and the people who think they can take over the world because they spend billions on bombs, rather than fighting poverty, and getting their country a
better education and healthcare (no offense on the education part, but its a fact that its not as good as in many other countries, Canada for
example).... Again, I have nothing against your nation, and have many great friends from the States, but so many people have to grow a brain (We all
know who I'm talking about... the American version of Hitler and his name reighms with "Cush")... They have to learn that they don't rule the
world, and that life exists beyond their ignorant little bubble, not a bunch of land to bomb the crap out of when their angry. If people keep acting
like this, I'm sorry to say, but something like my little simulation might happen, and all thats left of the United States of America will be yet
another burnt down White House in the middle of nowhere.