posted on Mar, 24 2005 @ 07:32 PM
People are rude because they assume they will never have to deal with you again. When society is anonymous, there is no social censure for
If you live in a small town, people cannot afford to be rude to you, since you will see the exact SAME person at the grocery next week. Maybe they
will even by sitting in the jury box when you come before the court. . . .
There was an anthropological study of the San bushpeople of the Kalahari that researched levels of violence and population size. The San used to live
in small nomadic groups for 10 months of the year, and only gathered as a nation during the rainy season. Anthropologists found that when the local
population exceeded 500, people began being more and more rude to each other, and resorting to violence. The author I read concluded that you can
only keep track of the personas of about 500 people in your mind. After that, they are "just strangers" and you don't feel any emotional
obligation to them.
Personally, I believe that the person showing honor or respect actually has more moral merit than the one being honored.
I lived through the 80's, when men were supposed to not open doors for ladies any more. We weren't supposed to call them ladies, either.
With about a handful of exceptions, there are no more ladies. merely women.
I remember holding a door for a womyn who castigated me for my obsolete social mores. She chided me for trying to "hold the door for a lady."
I shot back at her: "I am not holding the door because I think you are a lady. I am holding the door because I am a gentleman."
Actually, mom taught us to hold the door for everyone who approached, regardless of their gender (or manners!)
What peeves me? How about the fact that money is more valuable than honor. That if someone insults me, I am not supposed to challenge them to a
duel. But it is acceptable to sue them for money.
There are some things that cannot be bought. Or paid for.