originally posted by: LookingForABetterLife
a reply to: Finspiracy
Nice to find you here tonight. I'm sorry for your bird troubles. Are you certain it wasn't the Lohikäärmes?
How can you even remember such a word
(For others: Lohi = salmon, käärme = snake, lohikäärme = dragon)
It is the birds. Background info: i was maybe ten years old, every other weekend at my grandpa's and grandma's place. Should have spent those with my
father but he chose career and the bottle. Some birds were always there, eating their strawberries. Grandma promised me 10 marks for every bird i
shoot down. Air rifle. Missed once or twice. A bird landed on a tree branch near the strawberry field. Aimed, shot, and the bird dropped down like a
rock. A part of my soul died right that moment, i still remember how it felt. I still remember it nearly every time i see a bird. Never aimed towards
a living being ever since, and never will. Was truly not worth the 10 marks... You can get a bag of candy or a soda for that money. Very roughly 2
euros, 2 USD and so on...
Yesterday, i was taking a nap at my friend's place. Friend was at work. I woke up with one thing in my mind "Coffee... now..." Saw something fly by
and i was like
A little bird managed to fly inside and headed straight in front of kitchen window. I was totally awake right away, not much
choice. 2 cats in the apartment with me. Other one of them headed to the kitchen. My plan was to carry the cat into the bathroom, close the door, find
the other cat, carry her also to the bathroom while blocking with my foot that the other cat won't run out of there while i put the other cat into the
bathroom. Then it would have been just a human and a bird in the apartment, and cats out of the equation so then there would be time. I thought about
opening the front door and try to lure the bird to fly out. And... I failed.
So i lifted the other cat into my lap. And at that moment, the other cat runs two million miles per hour past me, and RIP bird... I was like "No...
No... will not watch this" So i let the other cat go from my lap, what is the point anymore? Went to the living room. Cat carried the bird in her
mouth and the bird was still flapping it's wings. Little tweets and sounds of tiny bones crushing. "Okay i can't listen to this either" Went to
bathroom, closed the door, set the faucet full speed and covered my ears with hands and broke down. But could not stay there in the bathroom forever.
Micro-meditation and after a couple of minutes, then i closed the faucet and entered the living room. Only to see just a couple of feathers here and
Then it hit me. This was my chance to save a bird, after i had murdered one 3 decades ago. And i F'd up my chance. I will get a little bit of money
tomorrow. Gonna head into a forest to do some serious apologizing. Gonna google about feeding them and stuff. I was thinking of some kind of grease
balls and this... like a seed thing that won't give all at once, but only a small portion drops to be eaten. I have to set them hanging from a branch
or something, not on the ground, so i have heard. Then take some distance and open a beer and sit down, and see if anyone flies to hear what i have to
say. Then wait a week and go back to the same place to take the plastic seed container and stuff like that with me and then recycle them. I don't want
to make the forest spirits angry, that is when real trouble is destined to begin.
City regulations ban feeding birds. Then they can sue me or something, and see if i care about their stupid books which tell me how to live and what
to do and what not to do. I am not a robot, i don't need an instruction manual, i need morals and ethics, not rules which were set by someone else
before me, with me having zero influence on that. I have a mission now. I have an agenda. Can't run around collecting bad karma all the time,
otherwise it will finish me.