posted on Jun, 8 2020 @ 01:56 AM
"Welcome back, this is your host Timothy Broderik, you're listening to 'let's talk' on 97.6FM Radio Freedom. In the aftermath of recent events we
want to talk about what you do to stay sane in this crazy year of 2020. Our first caller is from Minneapolis Dorty Miller, hello Dorty."
some crackling sonds, a very high pitched voice: "It's Dörte Müller. Döööööööö-dö-dö-dörte
Timothy: "Oh sorry, did I say that wrong? Dirty Muller?"
Dörte: "No, no, no DÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖRTE MÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜLLER! You say it almost like an 'o' but you put your lips out really far and it's a
sound like a moped Dööööööö-rte."
Timothy tries really hard: "Okay Dirty, what do you do to stay sane?"
Dörte: "DÖ! Well it's been really hard for me because I'm very active in many different groups, who center around any and all social issues and
of course ze environment, all of our meetings have been cancelled. Now I don't really know what to do. I feel like I'm just wasting away. But I
think now I found ze answer and want to share that with all ze people."
Timothy: "TH-th-th-the people."
Dörte: "That's what I said, ze people."
Timothy: "Alright, Dirty, tell us what that is."
Dörte a deep breathe, again some crackling sounds: "Well I believe, all people want to be good, right? So I figured, maybe they just don't
know how to be good, you know? So I made my own homepage and all, you can find it on ze facebook too, right? And.......a little pause, a dog
That stupid animal! And... it's called 'pasta salad' if your listeners want to check it out. It's basically a guide on how to behave, so you're
not a burden for ze society."
Timothy: "That sounds interesting! Can you tell us a little about what we would find on your 'pasta salad'?"
Dörte: "Sure. Well for one, being gender inclusive is very important to me, so I made a little section called 'ze perils of intercourse' where I
tell men, how they can avoid feeling ze urge to objectify ze persons they want to get intimate with. Like it doesn't matter who or what you find
attractive, being inclusive means you have to be ready to give love to ze people who need it ze most and not what you want matters, but ze needs of
Timothy confused: "But you single out men? Wouldn't this also apply to everybody else? Like lesbians, or cis-women who deny to 'give love'
Dörte: "No, because you see, we want to establish new rules to build a better world. And what you say sounds like you are a hippy. Are you a
Timothy: "Well no, I just meant..."
Dörte: "Good because ze hippies are what brought us into this mess, with their fight for free speech and all that. If you look at this world it's
obvious, we need more rules and not more freedom, right?"
dog barks again. Dörte yells:: "Like someone needs to shut that filthy dog down!"
Timothy: "You're against free speech?"
Dörte apparently struggles to regain her focus: "Well that depends, right? There are people who need to be heard and people who need to
listen. If the listeners talk and the speakers listen that would get us nowhere, right? Or well...crackling sounds again... it brought us where
we are today, everybody is violent, selfish and that's what makes society so disfunctional, you know."
Timothy: "Okay, Dirty, thank you for your opinion. There seems to be something wrong with your phone, we keep hearing those weird noises and..."
Dörte: "Don't worry about it, it's fine, it's what he deserves."
Timothy: "Okay, well other callers are waiting in the line, Dirty..."
Dörte: "Dö-DÖ-DÖÖÖÖÖÖ!" crackling sounds again, a muffled scream "One more thing, because it's important: never...crackling
... refuse my...crackling, a scream... pasta salad!"
Timothy: "That was interesting, we better send the police over to check out what was going on there."
Voice from the off: "There's no more police."