Do You think the Media has made some women gay?

I was wondering if TV has had a hand in making young women gay.
This is about, Women that seem to do it for attention, or for a guy’s approval. When I was in college I saw a lot of this, girls making out, and saying they are not gay. I use to run into girls 19 to 24 at a bar I worked at, and a lot of them seemed to think that guys liked lesbians and being with girls made them cool. I have seen this lot in the past few years.
I was thinking this had to do with media pushing this view on us. Radio, TV, Girls Gone Wild Commercials, Magazines.

Not judging anyone, but I’m curious if you think the Media played a big part in this, I do.

I think you may have a valid point here. Male homosexuality gets the most coverage, yet it still something more to be "tolerated" rather than "promoted". Lesbianism on the other hand seems to be gaining popularity especially among men as something cool and hip.

Yes I have noticed this also, it seems to me that women don't seem to have such an aversion to kissing and touching those of the same sex - yet i find the idea of kissing or intimatacy with another man disgusting... in fact I don't even understand how women can find us attractive - that may be the answer, women are far more attractive to men, so much so that they are probably attractive to each other!

This hits home. Recently my 16 year old daughter has professed herself as "half-gay" or "Bi" and has a "girlfriend" of 21. (uggh)

As a well educated man fascinated with the "psycology" behind everything, this really made me stop and look at my daughter's situation.

Upfront I will answer your question and say "yes" society has played a huge role in this. What happened is, my daughter has always been slightly on the heavier side. Her friends are not. In a social setting it seemed my daughter was always "not the one" the guys would show their attention too- but rather she was "everyones" best friend. Her friends apparently are sexually active and she is/was not. She felt really left out, and rejected. It's an honest emotion to feel. Then she became friends with a lesbian, who gave her the attention she wsnt receiving elsewhere- not sexual attention but... "I love you's" and such.... so very quickly she felt "cared about" and it didnt matter who was caring as long as SOMEONE did.

Here is where society comes into play. Guys do and always have liked the idea of "two girls", lesbians, making out etc... look how its glorified in the media, Howard Stern etc... This made her "conversion" much easier. We live in suburbia, and it's no longer "trendy" for girls to hook up but rather "natural" and your considered somewhat of an outcast if you dont. It is now "trendy" for guys to hook-up with guys apparently. (Yea I know). Many many guys at her high school are wereing hip huggers and belly shirts... going to "hook-up" parties where WHO your hooking up with doesnt matter, guy girl, whatever.

Society has blurred the lines made it acceptable for this to occur and frankly I say each to their own. In my daugter case, she likes full blown "bull dykes" with piercings etc... These lesbians look like guys. I suspect that as soon as a "hot guy" shows here attention she will go back the other way.

Dont know If I got off subject, so forgive me if I did so.

Great insight Serum39. I too am always trying to figure out the psychology behind why people do what they do. It's fascinating to me. I agree with everything you said, EXCEPT for it now being "trendy" for guys to hook up with guys!!! Man, I don't know about that.

Peace

Well I dont want to agree either about the guys w/ guys, but this what my daughter and her friends (guys & girls) have told me first hand. I had a hard time believing it too... but I had to go to pick her up at school one day and when we were walking down the hall she said "see- I told you" and proceded to point out a group of kids coming our way. 2 of the guys were wearing girls hip huggers with the butt cracks hanging out and tight girlie shirts. I thought they were gay, but she said the girls with them were their girlfriends but they go both ways so...

I would prefer to be wrong. But I did see a show on this too on a - dare I say- mid day talk show. If I didnt have a daughter, I probally wouldnt have known about this anyway. I guess its hard to believe unless you see it first hand.- oh well

[edit on 9-3-2005 by Serum39]

[edit on 9-3-2005 by Serum39]

hello,

i am agreed with you on your points and even at the fact that guys now apparently like to hook up together because it's trendy. eventhouhg i don't really get the point and to me, if you go with someone it's because there is some kind of attraction or something, not just because youhave to get someone. the parties you are talking about looks more like a supermarket night than a party, and even at the supermarket, you know what you want.
but my point is that the original question was about the influence on the women (and men) and them to become gay. one thing is sure is that now the gay and lesbians are open about their situation and everyone knows that because it's shown on TV every day. there is even this show, 5 man for a queer eye or something. so defenetly, the fact that homosexulaity is not a taboo anymore, make people find their way or just try a new way, because they are not ashamed about the look of the other.
what i would like to know is how many men/women come back straight after having tried the homo/bi

KJ1 the straight, so far ...

not gay....
it seems the in thing to do in the age group of 16-21 maybe, to say oh Im Bi....
Give me a break!
Most of it is for attention...
It sells (IE-the S*** that is the girls gone wild DVDs , ratings went through the roof for that crap show the OC when they had a *GASP* lesbian kiss)

Do you think it may reach the point where an actress may profess
gayness, just to get a gig?

Umm.. well yea...

Thats the point. Because media, society doesnt view it as taboo, and seems to almost encourage it, it makes it easier for these kids to try both sides.

Point to be considered. There is a distinct demographic of 18-25 that this is an issue pertains too. I dont believe the media has that same influence on age groups beyond that. (generally speaking).

These kids are looking for identity, so many feel lost (but thats another thread for another day) and "bi/lesbianism" is just another exploritory avenue that society has said "its cool" to try. Show me something/anything mainstream that these kids are seeing that counters the trend of being bi. Where is the other side to all this?



[edit on 9-3-2005 by Serum39]

I've gotta say that I tend to agree with this, to a point. Its 'chic' and 'fashionable' for young women to play 'bi-curious'. Not out and out gay tho, thats unreasonable.

Of course, its allways possible that the culture and media have simply made it acceptable, and these women are simply doing what any women would do.

And its a good thing! mwa hahaha

Hmm, might require more reserach. I think I feel a blue ribbon investigatory comitte comming on.

Oh wait thats something else! BWa!

Originally posted by Serum39
This hits home. Recently my 16 year old daughter has professed herself as "half-gay" or "Bi" and has a "girlfriend" of 21. (uggh)

Er, ain't that illegal?

Do you think it may reach the point where an actress may profess
gayness, just to get a gig?


Ummm - dont really know. But I will venture to say, if they are gay/bi that the envirnoment is such that saying so will not hurt their image but rather elevate it. Case in point. Porcha De Rosi (excuse the sp) when Ellen D. came out and said that they were dating... Porcha's stock went through the roof, "hot chick actress admitts shes gay!" ... it was talked about on EVERY hollywood show, and in the news etc... It was big news because the MEDIA made it so... honestly who cares!!!??

Hey- we are all voyouers by nature... open up someone's closet full of skeletons and the rubberneckers will gather around.

Originally posted by Nygdan

Originally posted by Serum39
This hits home. Recently my 16 year old daughter has professed herself as "half-gay" or "Bi" and has a "girlfriend" of 21. (uggh)

Er, ain't that illegal?

YES!!! Dont ask... as aparent, we must pick and chose our battles with our kids carefully. I'm 30 (shes my step daughter), but I sure learned alot and quick. We dont like this 21 year old but NOT because shes gay but because shes 21 and morally... well not good for our daughter. But the damage would be far woarse if we forbid her to see her. We hope this is a passing fad of a rebelling teen. We are bidding our time on this one.

Peace

[edit on 9-3-2005 by Serum39]

Originally posted by Serum39
... but I had to go to pick her up at school one day and when we were walking down the hall she said "see- I told you" and proceded to point out a group of kids coming our way. 2 of the guys were wearing girls hip huggers with the butt cracks hanging out and tight girlie shirts. I thought they were gay, but she said the girls with them were their girlfriends but they go both ways so...

I just dry-heaved for about five minutes.

Believe me, those guys are closer to gay than they are to straight. Don't let your daughter tell you any different. If it walks and talks.........well, you know!

Peace

I think women are beautiful creatures and it's natural for girls to be attracted to other girls. How could they not be? I also think most girls are 'bi' to some certain extent or the other. Girls clearly can tell if another woman is attractive, and can even admire that attraction. For some, this may be it... but other girls may like to go farther and kiss or experiment around. Even if they don't kiss, girls are a lot closer to one another than guys are. They see each other naked, they snuggle and sleep next to one another at sleepovers, they go to the bathroom together, etc. Kissing or doing sexual acts seems the next logical course of action. Plus like you mentioned, you add in guys 100% enthusiasm for this behavior, and girls are going to give in to their natural attraction for other girls. Yes in high schools nowadays I think that the majority of girls have kissed other girls.

Guys on the other hand, are completely different. We don't go to the bathroom together, we don't confide in each other as much, we aren't ever 100% comfortable with one another, etc. Touching is 100% off limits, whereas girls on the other side, its not. Also I couldn't tell an attractive guy from an ugly guy to save my life. Brad Pitt does not look good to me at all. On the flipside, girls can certainly look at Jennifor Aniston and say she looks good, she has a pretty face, nice butt, etc etc.

Anyway in conclusion I think all women/girls are bi to some extent or another. Even if they won't admit it... (just like they won't admit they like jerks better than nice guys, and every syrupy romantic movie says they like nice guys... fact of the matter is nice guys lose most every time while the jerks take home the women)

Aren't we all sortof bi? Its natural for both genders to have a curiosity of their own sexuality, especially in the teens. This is also essentuated by the situation. In my case, in high school, I noticed many of the lesbians or bi's all come out after being rejected from men. I agree with serum here, it deffinitely has alot to do with the situation around them. In the end though, I feel this is just a passing thing, as its a time to experiment with their sexuality, and figure out where they fit.

Nope. I dont think that we are sort of BI.
The gilrs being BIs, seems to come from the media. You dont see to much of this in older women, mostly younger women. 18 to 26. It is going on in highschool to. Its ashamed so much of it is marketed towards teens.

[edit on 9-3-2005 by Snowman9]

Maybe a little. Im not a women so I probaly have no business specualting but here goes. I think a lot of gay women have been used, lied to, raped, and abused by men early in their dating life, the scars from those events make them unwilling to partner up with men ever again. And I do believe some women are just born gay, as well as some men; call it hormones, genetics or whatever, that is just the way they are.

Also with women going that way they are often encouraged by a bunch of men to do so, ever been to a Frat party and seen a bunch of drunk guys drooling over girls making out? Or on Girls Gone Wild and similar trashy films many of the girls are handed out cash after they do their deed. Call it loosing inhibitions frm being drunk, lack of self control,or the attention whore syndrome. It happens all the time.

When girls 'experiment' with each other they are applauded, with guys they are shunned, and we cannot forget about all the diseases and social stigma gays open themselves up to. Also both males and females tend to 'switch teams' after being rejected often by the opposite sex.

As for the girls who fool around with other girls for attention, I could never bring myself to be with a girl like that for more than a week or two. Sure they dont have trouble picking up guys, but no intelligent guy wants to be involved with an attention whore. In my observations those are the same girls who end up crying and loosing their temper over the most pointless situations.

Originally posted by WolfofWar
Aren't we all sortof bi? Its natural for both genders to have a curiosity of their own sexuality, especially in the teens. This is also essentuated by the situation. In my case, in high school, I noticed many of the lesbians or bi's all come out after being rejected from men. I agree with serum here, it deffinitely has alot to do with the situation around them. In the end though, I feel this is just a passing thing, as its a time to experiment with their sexuality, and figure out where they fit.

I assure you I have NEVER had any of "those feelings" what so ever toward the same sex. I can and will say I have no problem saying.. yea that guy is good looking, he has style, etc... but I never came close to being "bi" and NOT for any other reason than.. its not my thing. No judgements passed.

But you are right, for the most part it is a passing thing- I believe this to be the case with my daughter. But in regards to the thread topic, the media/society has made it acceptable and often encourages it.

Quick thought- Chances are the head of FOX's OC is a guy. As I suspect these CEO heads are mostly horny men... of coarse they want girls kissing girls... think about the who makes the descions in the media...