It looks like you're using an Ad Blocker.

Please white-list or disable AboveTopSecret.com in your ad-blocking tool.

Thank you.

 

Some features of ATS will be disabled while you continue to use an ad-blocker.

 

Come on - worst jokes ever thread :)

page: 3
15
<< 1  2    4  5  6 >>

log in

join
share:

posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:23 PM
link   
what animal can you never trust
a cheetah




posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:24 PM
link   
Argon walks into a bar.
The bartender says "Hey buddy read the sign. We do not serve noble gases."
Argon didn't react.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:28 PM
link   
Why did the bridge of the Enterprise smell bad?

Because William Shat Near.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:28 PM
link   
There once were three brothers named Vromsk
Fell in love with a woman from Omsk
When it came time to marry
She spurned Dick and Harry
And married the brother named Tomsk.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:29 PM
link   
What did the salad say to the refrigertor? Close the door I"m dressing!



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:33 PM
link   
What's strong enough for a man, but made for a woman?

The back of my hand.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:34 PM
link   
My neighbor Ruth kept bugging me to give her a ride on my motorcycle.
So the other day, I agreed to give her a ride. She climbed on back and I headed down the street. I hit a big bump going 40 miles an hour,
and drove on, ruthlessly.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:38 PM
link   
On second thought I’m going to take that one down .
edit on 30-12-2019 by Fallingdown because: (no reason given)



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:46 PM
link   
A woman was vacuuming her house and got very hot. She didn't have air conditioning but had and turned on an old large floor fan. While she was vacuuming, she walked backwards into the fan...

Disaster.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:47 PM
link   
What do you call a ball bearing rat trap?


Tom cat.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:48 PM
link   
a reply to: PandaPrincess

Silly Sally was walking down the side walk

Suddenly a man pulls her into the ally and puts his hand down her shirt

Silly Sally just laughed and laughed

She knew her wallet was in her purse.




posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:53 PM
link   
Psychiatrists have diagnosed a condition that causes an irrational fear of Luke Skywalker's mentor.
They're calling it Obi Won Kenobi Phobia.


If John Lennon's widow had married the actor James Coco and then had married Sonny Bono after the actor died, she would be Yoko Ono Coco Bono.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:54 PM
link   
How to you catch a Unique rabbit?
Unique up on it.

How do you catch a tame rabbit?
The tame way.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 03:55 PM
link   
Bit of a naughty one...

What's got a hundred balls, and f%#@$ rabbits?

A shotgun.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 04:02 PM
link   
Why is the male Panda such a bad lover ?
He eats shoots and leaves.




posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 04:02 PM
link   
a reply to: ColeYounger

If Bill Gates married Gates McFadden, her name would be Gates Gates.

If Gene Pitney married Whitney Houston, her name would be Whitney Pitney.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 04:07 PM
link   
A cowboy comes riding into town and bursts into the Doc's office. "Doc, come quick!" he says, "Cletus just got bit square in the crotch by a rattler!" The Doc says "I can't come now, I'm deliverin' this baby! What you gotta do is git back there and suck the venom out right quick or Cletus is gonna die." The cowboy races back to his friend as quick as he can. Cletus sees him coming and says, "Where's Doc?"
"Doc couldn't come he was tied up."
"Well, what did he say?"
"He said you're gonna die."



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 04:10 PM
link   
Back in the '60's, large companies were all ways merging...

Shick razor company, Fuller Brush Company and Kentucky Fried Chicken merged.

It was called Fuller Chicken Shick.



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 04:37 PM
link   
did you hear the story of the old empty box

there was nothing in it



posted on Dec, 30 2019 @ 04:38 PM
link   

originally posted by: GeertrudeS
What did the salad say to the refrigertor? Close the door I"m dressing!


thats literaly the only joke i found funny


shame on the rest of you



new topics

top topics



 
15
<< 1  2    4  5  6 >>

log in

join